She told me she has no respect for him because he cheated on me once and lied to me 3 times now, I told her that he's changed. So instead of accepting an invite to watch movies with he and i, she said "no thanks, I don't enjoy being around him anymore since he hurt you" What do I do?!
2007-02-23 05:05:02 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I have been in your best friends shoes before. Most of the time your friends and family can "see" what you choose to be blind too. I lost a very good friend because she chose her now ex husband over all her friends. It hurt like hell when she basically told me off, I couldn't figure it out until she came in one day and I saw that her last name had changed. With out saying a word to me she told me the whole story. We have since mended our friendship and she now realizes that she will never choose a man over her friends.
It is going to have to be you that makes the final decision, she has told you how she feels and WHY (kudos for her) is this boyfriend of yours worth throwing away a friend that I presume has been there for you a lot longer then your boyfriend? It will be hard.
I see it this way, there are other men out there that aren't cheaters or liars, why settle for someone that has already hurt you and lied to you? From what I have seen people like this don't change, you can try your darnest to change them but most of the time you waste your time and get hurt worse in the long run. Is this truly what you want for yourself?
If it wasn't for friends and family telling me that my ex-fiance was a loser (there is more behind this but I won't get into that) I would have married him and I know that I would have been divorced shortly after. (I have heard through the grapevine that my ex hasn't changed a bit and it has been 10 years since I called off the wedding) I have no regrets.
I met my husband shortly after and have been married to him for almost 8 years now. I am so glad I listened to my family and friends.
Hope this helps and I hope you make the right decision.
2007-02-23 05:31:39 · answer #1 · answered by M M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think your friend really cares about you and she is letting you know that you can do better. No one ever changes, once a cheat always a cheat. Just remember boyfriends come and go, but a friendship lasts a lifetime. Pay attention to what your friend is saying...
2007-02-23 05:50:08 · answer #2 · answered by Urchin 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you should consider that she might be showing more wisdom than you. She's not as emotionally tied to your boyfriend, good or bad, so is more objective. People change, but only rarely and much more rarely in the case your describing than normally. You are emotionally vested in seeing that he has changed, so will see it even when he hasn't.
Since this isn't something you will accept, then you should just understand that she's doing this for your good, not her own.
2007-02-23 05:09:57 · answer #3 · answered by Radagast97 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to let her be. She might decide to come around later, but definetely do not force the issue. Sounds like she has some hurts, or maybe even some jealousy. Just wait and sooner or later the truth will be revealed.
2007-02-23 05:08:51 · answer #4 · answered by ineeddonothing 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well that sounds like a true friend that cares about you. Once a liar, MOST LIKELY, always a liar. She just cares about you and apparently doesn't want to see you get hurt. I wouldn't point fingers at her, for she sticks up for what she believes in. She thinks you can do better and maybe you should consider it!
2007-02-23 05:08:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you should dump your boyfriend and go have some fun with your friends. I agree with your friend. "Once a cheater always a cheater" He is a liar and a cheater You should totally go hang with your best buddy and dump him common girl you deserve better than that you sound like a sweet girl so go out and party.
2007-02-23 05:37:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that your friend is right. Let go of this loser. He lied 3 TIMES and cheated once,that he told you about. DUMP HIM. Friends are better then all the guys you will date
2007-02-23 05:08:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
the only thing you can do is accept her wishes...you arent going to dump him, and you dont want to lose her companionship...so just keep this away from each other, you wouldnt want something escalating you know? between them...she obviously has you in her best interests, and didnt appreciate him hurting you...dont make her choose to be around someone she doesnt care for.
2007-02-23 05:18:59 · answer #8 · answered by wolvie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL she probably just doen't want to tell you he's hit on her and she's uncomfortable that your are giving a male sk*nk a chance. Respect yourself. He will cheat again because you let him know it was ok by giving him another chance.
2007-02-23 05:10:08 · answer #9 · answered by ddtking2002 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Spend time with them separately ..... by the way you have a really good friend. I can't say the same for that boyfriend of yours though.
2007-02-23 05:08:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋