2007-02-23 04:57:01 · 26 answers · asked by bpgveg14 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
The date is really a decision you and your girlfriend should make yourselves.
On the note of marriage, you are making the right decision, children need their father just as much as they need their mother. I said THEIR father not A father. Fatherless homes have spawned the violence and disregard for others we see in America today. Is it any wonder that inner city blacks are so at risk when 80% are illegitimate. You'd be pissed too!
You also need to change your mindset completely. This young woman and your baby must come before you. All of your hopes and dreams need to shift in their direction, not the other way around, otherwise, you will divorce. Priorities and sticking power make a good marriage, Anybody tells you different, is a fool or a liar, and neither is any good. Love and beauty cannot carry a marriage, commitment wins the day.
2007-02-23 05:17:09 · answer #1 · answered by james 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't get married only b/c there is a baby on the way. I understand a lot of people frown on having A baby before you are married but that was the 1950's. You both are going to love this baby either way. Plus if you know you want to be with her for the rest of your life why do you have to rush. I would recommend that you wait until the baby is born and you two can enjoy having a baby around. Than after you get settled with the baby then go ahead and get married. If you separate the two than you can concentrate on one celebration and have time to enjoy it to its fullest. Both marriage and having a baby are at the top of the list of most exciting and unforgettable times in ones life. Take time. congratulations and best wishes to the both of you.
2007-02-23 05:17:03 · answer #2 · answered by Jan 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you planning on marrying before she got pregnant? I know everyone says that it is good for a couple to marry, but if you have only been dating her for a little bit and you are unsure if you want to get married, then wait, there is nothing wrong with making sure that you want to marry her, marriage in my eyes is forever and if you are not sure/ready to make that forever commitment then wait. Your baby will not suffer from having two parents that are together but not married. The baby will suffer more if you rush to get married and you get divorced when the baby is 5 years old. If you are ready to get married, then do it now, have a home for the baby when he/she comes into the world.
2007-02-23 05:16:05 · answer #3 · answered by Hawaiisweetie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not get married just because she is pregnant, get married because you want to spend your lives together. You can make great parents with out being married. The only reason I say this is would it be better to marry for a baby and then eventually put them through the heartache of a divorce? Or is it better to have the child see you both cooperate and be great parents with out being married? Children know when you are unhappy. But hey if you love her marry her after the baby, when she can feel like she looked her best on the most important day of your lives. Good luck.
2007-02-23 05:04:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's completely up to you and your girlfriend. I'm personally not getting married until a while after my baby is born, because I don't want to get married "just because I'm pregnant". I want me and my boyfriend to know that we are doing this because we love each other, not because we feel like we have to. But if you and your girlfriend want to get married now, there's nothing wrong with that either. Just don't spend your whole life trying to make the rest of the world happy. People say "Get married if you get pregnant to make it right in the eyes of God"...but the problem isn't the baby to these people, the problem is sex outside of marriage. If you feel like it's okay to have sex outside of marriage, and the baby came from sex...why wouldn't it be okay to have a baby? Do what's right for you, my friend.
2007-02-23 05:03:54 · answer #5 · answered by grayhare 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I say wait. Don't add the stress of planning a wedding along with planning for a baby. One thing at a time. A new marriage and a new baby can be hard. Being pregnant is very emotional. Let her have the baby and let her emotions/harmones go back to normal before making anymore life-altering decisions. If you love each other, and plan on marrying anyway, take your time and don't rush things (anymore - LOL). She may wish to take more time in the planning process anyway. Girls have a tendancy to want things "perfect" for their weddings. It should be up to your girlfriend though.
2007-02-23 05:08:19 · answer #6 · answered by Mom of 3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't matter when you marry. The question is "do you want to marry?" Sometimes marrying just because there is a baby involved isn't always the best answer. If you want to get married, then by all means do so. But just make sure it's what you would have wanted anyway.
2007-02-23 05:30:01 · answer #7 · answered by Jen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm waiting to get married after my baby arrives (I've been with my fiance for 7 years) but that's only because our parents don't mind and also because we'd rather save our expenses for the baby. I dont' really care what others think since i know I will be giving my baby a stable home with a permanent father and plenty of love and support. It's really up to you and your girlfriend, but remember that whatever is best for the baby should be your top priority!
2007-02-23 05:04:10 · answer #8 · answered by keonli 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thats completely up to you guys and your beliefs. If you guys are married now, then go for it, don't you think it'll be great to have a child born into a married lovin couple? I was 5 months when I got married..we were originally planning on it..but we found out we have a little one on the way. If you love her and know that she is the one, i wouldnt wait!
2007-02-23 05:05:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is for you two to decide. Don't think that you have to get married b/c she is pregnant. If you want to get married no matter what then I say go ahead and get married. Better to be married before. But if you are not sure and just want to get married b/c she is pregnant then I say wait. good luck
2007-02-23 05:06:45 · answer #10 · answered by doodersmom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋