My husband just called me to say his friend called him and would like to meet up for a few pints tonight. I'm annoyed because I was looking forward to a nice night in with him. Am I unreasonable?
2007-02-23 03:51:25 · 39 answers · asked by Carol T 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He should invite you along
2007-02-23 03:54:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
Your not unreasonable but honey that is the way men think...my husband gives me 10 min notice so feel lucky ha ha..don't be upset they (men) don't think the way we do. Get a good book, take a long hot bath and relax just tell him that tomorrow night is your night...or do what I do and make plans with your friends...I always ask my husband to not be real late and then when I ASK him he is usually home in a few hours and in a good mood.
2007-02-23 03:55:37 · answer #2 · answered by r_fazenbaker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Might be unreasonable if he only does it once in awhile. If he goes out often, then he needs a wake-up call. Would it be better if he just didn't come home, and you had to track him down at the local pub? My co-workers often talk about their conquests after a night partying. Then they complain that their spouses were angry because they got home at 2a.m., and that they had to turn their phone off because their spouse kept calling them. If the worst he does is call you and give you notice, then he sounds like a reasonable guy. Maybe you should invite yourself out with them. You aren't a homebody are you? If you are, a change of pace would be good. If you already like the nightlife, then join him. If he says no, then...What's up with that? I always welcome being able to spend time with my wife, no matter what the occasion. Meeting up with friends, at work, going out, anytime. I am proud of my wife and everything about her. She can show up at anytime and it always brings a smile to my face. So, given these options, are you unreasonable?
2007-02-23 04:00:16 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's your HUSBAND. Just tell him - honey, I would really love to spend a nice Friday night with you, and only you. What's wrong with that? Most of the time, I don't have a problem with my husband going out with friends, even if he only gives me an hour notice, because we spend a lot of time together as is. But if for some reason I wanted him to stay home, I would tell him, and he would have no problem with that. You have to be able to communicate to your mate; he probably has no clue you're stewing about it.
2007-02-23 03:59:05 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you trust you rhubby? If so, just let it ride. He needs some spontanaety in life just as you do I'm sure. My husband does this from time to time and he comes home in a good mood missing me. Even if I have had a bad day and was really looking forward to him coming home straight from work, I try to not get mad. But Do remember that if he can do this spur of the moment thing, so can you. Meet up with the girls somenight, have fun while he is expecting you to come home that day.
2007-02-23 03:57:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The main question is....did you already set aside this evening to spend time with him and did he know it? If he thought nothing was going on, 5 hours is enough time to let you know especially if he asked if you wanted to join them.
What would have been worse is him telling you as he's going or not telling you at all. Best thing in a relationship is communication, you two could work out a nice system for alerting each other of plans for the evening.
Remember, marriage is for life....enjoy it.
2007-02-23 03:55:39 · answer #6 · answered by chad_zortman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on whether it is something he does all the time. If not, let him go, the two of you can make time, but communicate to him when that is. You just said "I'm annoyed because I was looking forward to a nice night in with him", well did he know that is what you wanted?
2007-02-23 04:22:17 · answer #7 · answered by finished 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yea i would make sure he isnt cheating for one, second off, tell him , i was really hoping to spend time with you tonight,... and possibly ask, do you mind if i bring a girlfriend and we all could hang out at the pub together... if he says no, or hints around at a no, then i would be very suspicious... but if he is really meeting a male friend, and is not gay... then yes you should still be angry dpeending on how often he does this.. maybe you should start doing the same to him, when he wants to do something call and say, oh well im going to the pub with my girlfirends.. give him a taste of his own medicine. best of luck ♥
2007-02-23 03:56:29 · answer #8 · answered by ~♥Dominatrix♥~ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good question only you can answer.
Questions like this usually expose a SELFISH party. Now you have to determine FIRST is it YOU. If it is you you need to correct your thinking.
And generally speaking if this is a rare occurrence it is probably not him. Now if he does this every night to your detriment I'd say he's got his priority wrong.
I mean what would you want him to do if you had an out of town old girlfriend stop by and want to go shopping for a few hours. Would you want him to be here asking Questions?
My suspicion is you are being a bit self-centered.
2007-02-23 03:59:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just turn the tables. What if an old buddy of yours called? Would you want your husband pouting all weekend because you wanted to go meet her for a drink? Why not go along and have a few with your husband and his friend?
2007-02-23 03:56:21 · answer #10 · answered by Bev 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do you want? Twenty-four hours? You're being unreasonable. If you wanted a quiet night at home you should have made these intentions know alittle earlier. Next time communicate well in advance. Either that or make your wishes known in no uncertain terms.
2007-02-23 04:19:15 · answer #11 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋