He said...I love you and will always love you but I'm starting to have a wondering eye I asked him what he meant he pretty much just said he was a guy and he said he caught himself wondering how far he would go if he got a girls #....also he used to have low self esteem and used to be a really small man and ive introduced him to working out and eating right and now he's really cut and looking better than he ever has been now he has a huge ego...what would you do
2007-02-23 02:11:28 · 46 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
i would dump him
2007-02-23 02:13:34 · answer #1 · answered by chris 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
i'm not going to say dump him, its obvious you know why he is now starting to have a "wandering eye" he is finally getting the attention he didn't receive before. I dont think that means he will cheat & he is obviously telling you (i dont think to hurt you) but you let you know he is aware of his behavior. I would suggest an open dialogue with him about what you both want. Its in a guy's nature to be drawn to visually stimulating images (ie women LOL) so he will look no matter what but if what he has with you is truly special to both of you thats as far as it goes just looking and wondering...what if? Really talk to him if he isn't in the same place you are and you dont think you will be able to trust him now because you are feeling insecure then you can always try couples counseling or make the joint decision to continue or release your relationship. Don't just dump a good guy because he is starting to love himself more but remind him & yourself that you are an empowerment to him & should be always to yourself. Ok i'll stop channeling Dr. Phil now
2007-02-23 02:53:23 · answer #2 · answered by wyatt.rebecca@sbcglobal.net 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wondering eye isn't good. wandering eye is alright ( if the Chippendales walked past u know you're gonna look!) same for us. if a woman walks by in a bikini we'll admire. but there's no way I'd have even thought about it. Used to tease my wife about this construction guy she drooled over. Hell, she gave me a Playboy subscription for christmas once. as long as admiration stays admiration AND doesn't get out of hand, can it hurt? It does show a sense of frank honesty that is important in a relationship.
He doesn't have the right to step out on you. remember that. and if he does, change the f*****g locks. just cause he missed the boat earlier in life doesn't matter
2007-02-26 16:53:58 · answer #3 · answered by UPbeachbuggy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ummm.. hunn whether you two break up or not it is really up to you.... you should talk to him about whats going on and how it makes you feel.... since he did have a self esteem problem, make it known that you rnt trying to shoot and kill just trying to get your feeling across.... let it all out and tell him what you told u, and more, if he reconizes where you r comin from and then you both can work things out ( but dont expect him to have nothin to say about you ) although if his "shape change" has given him too much of and ego and he just can't wrap his mind around what you r saying, then saying together will just be trouble for the both of you.... no matter how much it hurts
2007-02-23 02:22:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are married or in a serious relationship, I would not just end things on that statement. If you are planning on getting married, I would wait & see if he is just wondering, or planning on acting on an those impulses. If he decides he wants to date other women, then let him, go ahead and dump him& move on. At least he's being honest about it, something that most people, man or woman don't usually do.
2007-02-23 04:08:32 · answer #5 · answered by Al 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't dump him just yet, you've been together for three years. Obviously, you both have a lot invested in each other. You have to give him some credit for being upfront and honest with you. I have to say, that if I was in his position, I might not be so forth coming with my feelings. In any relationship, there is always a chance that a partner will stray, but it is an emotional risk we take going in.
Good luck to you.
2007-02-23 02:17:25 · answer #6 · answered by sleepingliv 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ouch!
Three years is a long time to be with somebody. If you're young then maybe it's best for both of you. If you're older then you should have done the wedding thing already. It sounds to me like things have become a bit stale for your b/f. That is reason enough to dump him. You might as well do it, because it sounds like he's getting ready to dump you. That or he wants to make it easy on himself by making you the bad guy who breaks it up.
2007-02-23 04:59:15 · answer #7 · answered by Peter D 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe not dump him... yet. I think is a silly, stupid think to say to someone you love, because when you really love YOU DON"T WONDER. If he continues making this kind of comments you must put a stop to it. In fact, this comment still is a sign of a low self esteem... and of being a fool.
2007-02-23 03:08:08 · answer #8 · answered by gabyrogut 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump his ***, a real man doesnt say that to a woman he loves. What you have on your hands is a wuss who still has low self esteem and feels like he needs to try a few women on to feel fullfilled. Unfortunatly he has alot to learn about love, and more importantly self love. Get rid of this loser ASAP.
2007-02-23 07:48:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, that's massive disrespect. If he's committed to you, he wouldn't wander. There are plenty of men in this world who can committ to one woman, who are also beautiful and have high self-esteem.
Tell him you're getting a wandering eye also, and you're looking for someone who knows they only want you. Tell him don't let the door hit him on the way out.
2007-02-23 03:11:17 · answer #10 · answered by ~Biz~ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A man is going to look and he's going to wonder--don't you? And I think he's being pretty open with you--or he's already cheated and hinting. I've been with my husband for eight years and the ground rules from the get-go were #1 Hit me and you're history; #2 Cheat on me and ditto. I mean it, too.
2007-02-23 02:18:51 · answer #11 · answered by Mad About Purple 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋