Seriously bad position in our marriage?

Question

I need real help - please tell me someone has had problems like this with sex in their marriage.?
My wife and I have been married for 2.5 years and we still havent had sex yet. We tried on our wedding night but in our nievity didn't know what to do, we were nervous etc. We lost confidence after that, and tried less and less. We used to have oral sex etc. but even that dosne't happen anymore.

We had gone out for many years before, but decided to wait. I wish we handn't now as non-sex is part of our life. It almost feels like we are more friends then husband and wife. We have had a pretty bad married life, lots of arguments, tears etc. We have just started seeing a therapist to help wit the arguments, let alone the sex.

I just don't know what to do. In my heart I think the sex issue is the root cause of everything. We are both very low in confidence, and the fact that we haven't had sex seeks to make us feel worse about ourselves even more.

Has ANYONE been in the same situat

Answer 1

Maybe a sex book and or sex therapy would be good for you two. Sex is an important role in a marriage. It helps with the bond. You never feel closer to your spouse than after making love to each other. I hope you and your wife find your way. Good Luck!

Answer 2

Honestly no I haven't , but have you tried to ask her if something bad has happened to her as a child or an adult ? Not saying this is the issue but it could be . Also do you feel she is more comfortable or maybe a little flirty with women ? I ask these questions cause a friend of mine was going through this as well and she came to me and told me in secret that she only married her husband to make her parents happy and to hide who she was . That she was so miserable in her marriage and not having sex with her husband and things are getting really bad between them . I asked why would you be so miserable he is a very nice man . She said I am going to divorce him cause I cant lie anymore . I was thinking what could she be lieing about . Then she dropped it like it was hot , she said I am gay and I don't like men I like women and I will never be happy pleasing everyone else but me . That was a shock to everyone but we dealt with it and she is as happy as can be now . GOOD LUCK !!!