Have been married for 2years does he really love me?

Question

I have been with my partner for 4 years and been married for 2years ,how do i know if he really does love me or is he just using me.

We have 3 children 2 from a previous relationship and one with him.Is he only staying for his daughters sake or what.

He knows their is nothing i wouldn't do for him,i do everthing that is expected of a wife,but he just treats me like dirt.

It just seems that the more i do the more he expects,i feel like i am his slave someone to run after him all the time.

My last relatioship was the same and i had spent 16yrs with that man and i feel like i'm doing the same with this man. Don't get me wrong i love this man with all of my heart but i really thought this time around i had found the man of my dreams.

Someone who would look after me,but it seems that i'm the one who always ends up looking after them. All we seem to do all the time is fight and it's tearing me up inside.

Please help?

I have been to counselling and the counseller has told me that i was not the problem.

I think of my children everyday and what they are going through,and when we do fight my children always say to me that they don't want daddy to leave.

He won't go to counselling as he seems to think he's not the problem. Is he scared of not being loved or something.

I'm not afraid of being on my own and my children will always come before any man.

My children have already said to me who will be their daddy,they have already one dad who doesn't give them the time of day.

Let alone a second dad,this man has raised them since they were 2years of age. I want to do what is best for my children,cause at the end of the day they will love me no matter what"?

I feel so alone and so unloved? I just want someone to love me for me and love my children. I'm sick of being hurt all the time.

Answer 1

Leave him. It'll do you right. This scumbag needs to learn that women are not s e x toys or property, they're people! Go and find a better man, one who treats you the exact opposite way this guy treats you. This man doesn't love you anymore.

P.S. Take the kids.

Answer 2

Mostly low self-esteem and low self-love steers people to the wrong relationships. Stop and assess what went wrong in current and previous relationships before you ever think of moving on to someone else. You can't take a man or woman with negative characteristics and turn them into a prince or princess. In fact the only person you can change is yourself.

Answer 3

Sounds like you are repeating the same mistakes as with the first relationship.

The question is really:

What are you doing to make the relationship turn out the way it is?

Since the same thing is happening over again is it because of the type man you picked or is it because of the way you act toward him?

Are you properly communicating with him? (That means in a manner he understands... not "do you think that he SHOULD understand.")

I suggest Dr Laura's book "The Proper Care and feeding of Husbands" http://www.drlaura.com/main/books_1.html Along with "10 Stupid Things Women do to mess up their Lives"

Women actually have more control over whether the relationship succeeds than men do.

Answer 4

Sounds like he's getting board, and your letting him use you like a mat. Stop bending over backwards, and stand up for yourself!!Also try leaving him for awhile, and see if he cares. Go to your Mom's or some friends. You may need to see a counselor or a man of the cloth. Just sit him down and ask him if he still wants you, and still loves you, if not don't get mad, or feel hurt, just go. There's a good man out there somewhere, looking for a good woman like you.

Answer 5

He treats me like dirt - that stood out like dogs balls(excuse the french) - i know its a big call but bring things to a head - say you are sick of being treated badly and live with a female friend, call him every day so he doesn't start harassing everybody to find out where you are. stay away at least 2 weeks even if he says he will change. Come back on your terms-be strong, its probably your last chance if you want a fulfilling relationship.

Answer 6

You chose another man for the wrong reasons again. You need to get yourself some support (as in therapist) and have that person work with you about your choices in life. Once you feel you understand yourself, then you can decide whether this relationship is worth putting the time and effort into saving. Fix yourself first the other issues will fall into place.
good luck.

Answer 7

There is something wrong here. I'd sit down and talk with him. If this doesn't work tell him you'd like to get some counseling. If he refuses then maybe and this is maybe, he isn't the man for you. He should be waiting on you hand and foot. Good Luck, you sound like a very nice woman.

Answer 8

i think sorry for you by using fact this guy is a quite intelligent guy. He has his cake and is eating it too. he won't in any respect pass away his spouse, if that's what your wishing. He has the perfect of the two worlds. he will shop on making use of excuses on why he won't be in a position to pass away his spouse. on the different hand, i don't understand why you're nevertheless sticking around with a married guy. you ought to not in any respect have began seeing him in case you knew that he replaced into married. do not supply the lame excuse which you like him by using fact in case you quite love him you are able to have enable him be. A married individual isn't unmarried ( it quite is why there is one in each and every of those element as "marriage" ). even although he fell for you while he replaced into married, it replaced into quite purely a actual element and that i'm particular that it quite is nevertheless in simple terms actual. pass finally end up a unmarried guy and pass away the married ones on my own till you in simple terms % to be a intercourse toy.

Answer 9

If you lay down at the door, he will wipe his feet on you. Maybe its about time that you stopped doing the same things that ruined your first marriage. Don't be his mother. Maybe that is the problem. He is a man, and he wants a wife, not a mother. Let him do for himself sometimes. You will get more respect. Dont be a door mat.

Answer 10

Family counseling would be a great idea, especially that you say you still love him. If he doesnt want to go to counseling, go yourself. Learn what it takes to make your marriage work and then...if all else fails....then you might want to separate for a while.