Will you speak my Language around me?

Question

I am in the Philippines with my filipina wife and her friends and family always speak to each others in Tagalog around me and I find it frusterating. Is it too rude of me to ask them to speak in English in my presants? They know both I only know English.

Answer 1

Hey, that's rude !! On their part !!
It always happens to me at the office,but family & friends?
That's no way!
U GOTTA ask them to stop doing that.
Be friendly in asking, they must be hoping that u learn their language real fast, but do tell them it's not the case!

Answer 2

I feel that the answers prior to mine does not fully address your concerns so I felt the need to put my two cents in.

I apologize for the behavior of my compatriots whenever you are around them. While I cannot fully vouch for their reasons for acting that way, I am quite certain that they do not do so on purpose (i.e. they are talking bad stuff about you). As someone whose second language is English, I can say that it is not easy to speak the language. However, I do try to converse with my housemates in English whenever we have a foreign visitor in our midst (I translate the answers too if they are in the vernacular).

I understand that it does sound rude when they talk amongst themselves, but you must realize that not every Filipino is conversant in English. They may understand what you are telling them---especially if you speak a little slowly---but it doesn't mean they can easily formulate a multi-syllabic answer. Besides, many Filipinos tend to be critical of others who mangle or mispronounce English. Therefore, this is a cultural thing. They do not mean to be impolite to you (you can ask your Filipino wife!). But surely, you may ask them to speak English when you're around. Just don't laugh when they take forever to finish a simple sentence. It is THAT hard to them.

And no, not all Filipinos are untrustworthy. As in many societies, there are bad eggs in some baskets. Do not let an unpleasant experience spoil the many good ones you've had in this country.

Lastly, put yourself in their shoes. What if you have a Spanish friend coming over to visit you in your country? You know a little of his language but your housemates know so much less. Will it be impolite of you guys to speak in a language you are more comfortable of? I don't think so.

What I suggest you do is take some informal Filipino/Tagalog lessons. If you can't lick 'em, join 'em.

23 Feb 2007; 8:51pm, Philippines

Answer 3

So you are in the Philippines and you want everyone to speak English----bad luck it ain;t going to happen.
You will find that they are not being rude at all, because
1/ they are in their own country speaking their own language,and
2/ even though they can speak English they are more comfortable with their own language.

What you can do is to interrupt every now and then with a question and then try to hold the conversation in English.

I know that it is frustating but you really have to learn to live with it
and just remind yourself that your wife is in her country let her enjoy her native language.

Answer 4

Well i understand how you feel about that, that's really sort of frustrating.
Some folks are not comfortable speaking in english (even though they can) specially in the comfort of their homes. They are more casual with the local language but you just wish they would at least make you feel comfortable too.

Try to ignore, but talk it over with your wife so she would know that you aren't comfortable when everyone's speaking in "strange tongues". Then be open to learn some local phrases.

Answer 5

You can try asking your wife to speak English instead but I think they might feel uncomfortable about it. Put yourself in her situation. Take for instance, you are in Japan and you meet another American or English speaker. Would you speak Japanese or English infront of your Japanese wife or friend? If you are that polite enough you might speak Japanese but it will be awkward. I doubt you could even express yourself well.

Answer 6

I ought to comprehend because i'm a language geek. yet a million) chinese 2) English 3) Spanish so i'd pass for Spanish. I advise you unassumingly communicate English reliable so it really is unnecessary getting to charm to close English and chinese and billions of letters so that you would ought to study a clean alphabet so that you're acceptable off getting to charm to close Spanish. Plus it really is truly ordinary

Answer 7

I got one advise for you ...


When in Rome, do as what the Romans do!

I was in Malaysia, and people didn't even know how to speak English but hey, I learned their language out of frustration. Filipinos are comfortable speaking in their language so if you are kind enough, let them. They will not expect you to speak Tagalog when they are in your country anyway right?

AND HEY, YOU CAN'T EVEN SPELL YOUR ENGLISH WORDS RIGHT.

Answer 8

OK, you are in the Philippines. The language is Tagalog. Deal with it, and learn some. Sorry - I'm a foreigner and live here too. If I don't bother to learn their language, it's my fault and not theirs.

Answer 9

It's simply saying when you are in Rome, do what the Roman's do. I know they are not saying anything against you. Remember, they may be shy or something like that. Learn the language and it will benefit you later. Just politely tell them that you want to converse with them but you cannot join in since you do not understand what they are talking about.

Answer 10

if i'm around you and your wife not only that i would not speak english i also wont speak tagalog. i would speak our provincial language to further frustrate you and your wife too. and any tagalog speakers. i always do that. LOL!