Mother in law?

Question

We have been married for only 2 weeks, my wife is wonderful, I love her with all my heart and soul. She misses her home very much, she is from out of the country and can not return home until her immigration documents are complete, about 6 months from now. The problem is that she misses her mom terribly. She calls every night, which is fine, but now she wants to send 100 dollars a month to help out her mom because her dad is so over bearing and refuses let her have any money. I feel like that is an issue between them, not us. Her parents make very good money, they have plenty and are not in great need other than the fact that her dad is protective with his money. What is the best way to handle this in a loving and caring way...

Answer 1

Invite her, your mother-in-law to live with you. she would be very useful when kids come to this world, and you'll be giving your money for something in return.

Answer 2

You are in a bit of a "pickle". I too left my country and it take time to adjust . I believe you are very generous letting her call home so much but that is excessive and should gradually get less. You're wife's place now is with you and needs to grow up to be you're wife and put you ahaid of all else.
She is being squeezed by her Mom and if you belong to a Church, have the Preacher talk to the both of you about this issue (it's important to get solved)
Once an a while is ok to send a little money but it should never be on regular base, ESPECIALLY HER NOT BEING IN NEED OF IT.
I agree with you totally, (her parents need to settle between them self's)

Answer 3

Is she working? If she is working and brings into the household then I'd tell her its her choice. If she's not then I'd just say we can't afford to do that at this time. Tell her you don't mind sending money once in awhile but not monthly, you married her and took on the responsibility of taking care of her not her family too. Of course she has to think about the Dad too, how will he feel if/ when he finds out she's been sending money.

Answer 4

Your the man of the household. You lead the way. Your wife needs to know that this is not smart because you are newly married and you are saving for things yourself.
Just plain out tell her "We can not send your parents money."
You be in charge of the money if you think she might cheat and send it anyways.

Answer 5

That is actually a good idea. If possible, let your wife get a job if she wants to send her own money to her mom.

Answer 6

when you say" Her Parents" does this mean her mother works ? the mother should retain a certain percentage of her earnings or if shes given an allowance retain a small portion and stash it away ...you have bills and such and as long as mom is not destitute your wife shouldn't have to help ..unless shes earning her won pay check and wants to send some of it to her mom then its her money and she can do with it as she chooses ...

Answer 7

Shhhhit ,,,um not sure what uve married here???? Do u know her commitments 2 her family seen as she is an immigrant?? Just be honest with her, and with your self too wouldnt wana see u get into a messy marriage & its only been 2weeks!! Ask Questions!!
You have a right 2know whats going on!!!!!! Goodluck

Answer 8

Try to make her understand that her dad is doing that in her mothers interest and why can she just talk to her father about it rather than sending money without his knowledge

Answer 9

Have your wife get a job if she wants to send money.

Answer 10

Your wife can send the money out of her earnings.

Answer 11

Sit her down explain that maybe she should let go alittle and 100 pounds is alot. tell her to save that money to go visit her family instead. Be sensitive, but marriage is about honesty. so speak to her.