My wife threw me out but tells me she loves me?

Question

My wife of thirteen years, told me and my two teenage daughters to move out. I have two daughters from a previous relationship and she has one teenage son from a previous mariage, we also have a ten yr old son together. Something has not been right for a while with our relationship as she has been very distant from me and doesnt spend any time with me. I thought she just needed space and I stopped pushing. I moved out and she calls every day and comes over once or twice a week. Mostly for sex then gets dressed and leaves? I miss her and my son very bad and strugle to deal with this every day. It is effecting my job and my health. When we talk she tells me she loves me but wont give me a good reason for wanting me out. She has said the problem is with my daughters because they dont like her. this is not true at all, she is all they have known for a mother for there whole life (my X is not around or part of there life) She refuses to see a counsler is it over? Do I just move on? HELP

Answer 1

Well sorry to hear that. I do not wanna say this but seems like there is someone else in the mix. She wants to have her cake and eat it too. If she does not want you to live with her make her woman up to her word that means NO SEX either cause she could have all the sex she wants if you were still together. Do not allow her to keep holding onto you while she is doing her thing. This will let her know that if things do not work out with whatever she is doing she knows that she can all ways run back and get you make your self distant from her you do not have to go out there and be with anyone else I am just saying that when she wants to come over make yourself not even be home make yourself unavailable to her needs. When she sees that she is going to loose you to someone else she may come back but then she may not. But do not allow her to come and go as she please spend your time doing what you like to do and raise your girls they need you the most. take your daughters and son out somewhere fun and enjoy your life, she is living her life and not even worrying about if she is going to get you back or not cause your giving her access to you when she wants it so she is not worrying herself about you. You are going to have to stand tall and stand strong during this. Now it is time for you to spend your time with your family without her it is going to be hard but you have to gain your strength back, focus more on the things in your life if she really loves you she would have not put you out plus she is your wife and if she had any problems with your daughters she would of been woman enough to talk with you to work it out not put you out she wants to run around and do her own thing right now so let her go do her thing and you do yours show her that you are not going to be avaiable for her to come get sex just because she wants it she is playing with your feelings and emotions and that is not right. Be there for your son ONLY nothing more. I am available for some family outting fun!!! HE!HE! Just keep your head up there is a woman out there who will treat you right and take your girls in as well stay strong and focus on you, your son and your girls. SMILE!!!

Answer 2

You are still in denial about the breakup and the reasons for it.

It seems that your daughters have been making your wife's life a living hell, and when she tried to talk to you about it, you denied her reality. I.e, you told her that what was happening wasn't really happening, and what she was feeling was wrong or not important. That would make anyone despondent and crazy. She did the only sane thing anyone could do in a situation like that, get out of it.

Obviously she still has feelings for you, but after 13 years they are not the same as at the beginning of the relationship.

To save your marriage, you have to return to a place where you respect and listen to your wife's words as you wish to be respected and listened to. You need to demonstrate that you will protect her from verbal abuse from your teenage daughters, and discipline them when they need it, and keep your wife completely out of it. Your daughters do not respect your wife as an authority figure over them. Just accept that and be their parent. That way she will not be constantly in the line of fire.

You both are seriously in need of a good marriage counselor. Even if she doesn't go, you should go for the sake of yourself and your children. Probably you daughters could use teen counseling if it is not too late for them.

Answer 3

I don't think that there is a nice way to tell your wife that she's gaining weight. You should love her for her and as long as she loves herself and the way that she looks then let it go. Maybe you should start eating healthier. Also, why don't you try to take her to the gym or explore the outdoors with her. I, as a woman would want to know if my husband was starting to find me less attractive, but not all women are the same. Again, if she's ok with the way that she looks and feels, you should leave it alone.

Answer 4

people will make up any lame excuse they can to leave a spouse, or get rid of them. if she refuses to seek counseling than the problem may not be with u or the children, think she may be having an affair with someone else, she seems to want you and yours out of the house, she wants to be single and i think at some point this needs to go one way or the other here, as it isn't fair to u to keep u hoping and putting faith in reconciliation, and having it never happen. chances are she is having an affair, and may love u but loves him too. confront her, find out why she feels this way if u can, u can't keep on like this, it has to go one way or the other. could be she is not yet sure of this other man and is afraid to make a move one way or the other.

Answer 5

If you did not do something wrong, someone could be messing with her head. Either a family member or co-worker. Does her family like you? Is she pretty and how does she dress when she is not around you? Too many things, bro. 13 years is a long time to just try and end. A lot of people I know with kids from different parents have a lot of problems. Too many possibilities.

Answer 6

You may not be seeing everything going on with your 'little princesses'. I definitely would seek out family counselling to get to the root of it and see if this can be salvaged.

And dude, if you're out of the house because she is distant from you and has problems with the relationship, booty calls on her part doesn't really help the situation. You may get your rocks off, but it doesn't solve any problems.

Answer 7

yes you move on she wanted you to move out and you did. stop taking her phone calls everyday I'm aware you do have to speak because of the son you share but sleeping with her and allowing her to keep you at her beck and call is contributing to your pain while you wait for her to change her mind and make the words of love turn into actions of love. she is quite content to let you deal with the teenage girls that she seems to dislike so much that she no longer wants to live with them. tell her she cant have it both ways . just like when you got married you and the girls are a package and to love you is to love them .

Answer 8

Shes Cheating- Women Will Act Like This When They Are Cheating- TRUST ME

Answer 9

I honestly feel that she is playing with your mind and your emotions and you are allowing her to do so. If she has left you, then let her go (especially if you tried to work it out). Do not let her enter your heart just to rip it out again. She needs to take care of herself before she can continue in a relationship.

Answer 10

Seek help for yourself. Afterwhich she may realize that your family needs to be put back together. If she still doesnt see what she may be throwing away, at least you will gained some insight into who you are, and what you truly desire.