I'm starting to belive that my husband hates me, and for reasons I do not know. I can't tell if I'm the cause of his hatred, or if he is just a hateful person in general. I have been married for 5 years, and our relationship has slowly declined into a co-habitation. When is enough, enough? He always says he wants our marriage to work, but we just make each other miserable. What should I do?
2007-02-22 14:40:59 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I've asked him to go to marriage counseling multiple times and he refuses, or he will agree to it just so I stop asking then we never go
2007-02-22 14:52:39 · update #1
Marriage is a partnership. You both need to learn how to communicate with one another. You both should try to do the little things that you did before you got married. A marriage should not be about who is going to take out the trash. Every marriage changes as time goes by. We take the other person for granted and forget to make them feel special. Start doing special things for him and when he does something special for you tell him how greatful you are for him doing those things for you. Both of you need to remember why you fell in love in the first place and try to get back in that routine. Good luck.
2007-02-22 16:40:52 · answer #1 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first thing you should do is seek counseling and help for you and for you marriage. I dont feel he hates you at all since he wants the marriage to work out. Why do you make each other miserable if i may ask? You both need to learn to communicate and love each other and not just co habitate. You really need to work on your marriage.
http://www.drphil.com
2007-02-22 23:10:49 · answer #2 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that first you should try to identify what the real issues are and only then settle on a solution. The link from Wikipedia on attachments gave me some interesting insights into my relationship problems.
Help is always available through counseling but understanding why is very important.
2007-02-22 23:09:59 · answer #3 · answered by John B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should make the effort to be a better wife instead of brushing this under the rug and expecting him to change. Show him some more respect, appreciation, and affection. I can guarantee that things will turn around. If you are like most women though, you'll just expect him to change and think that you're too good to change and get a divorce.
2007-02-22 22:50:14 · answer #4 · answered by SillyKimmie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
THROW IN THE TOWEL!!!! He does not want your marriage to work if he wont work at it and you have already made up tour mind ... there is no reason for two people to live with the contempt he displayed toward you . Like I said he does not want your marriage to work he just don't like the idea of being alone and after you leave Id bet he wont be for long...May already be seeing someone?
2007-02-22 22:48:15 · answer #5 · answered by Rock Star Outlaw 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't no the man you have been married to for five years .You had to no if he was mean when you married him or if he loved you. If this is something that just started then I would be wondering why now.You do no that is one of the signs of cheating.Your husband really does turn on you.Everything you say and do is wrong. You feel he is purposely starting fights with you for no reason.If he is doing any of this I would start to worry about who he 's been with .
2007-02-22 23:33:42 · answer #6 · answered by Teenie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Foodychic has the best answer... get to counseling with no excuses... just get help, it will not fix itself, and if the two of you cannot talk about it/fix it, then trying a few professionals is your only option other than quiting.
2007-02-22 22:49:03 · answer #7 · answered by Been there 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems like your husband wants to continue the marriage, what do you want? Both of you would have to make compromises, marriage is tough, but worth it.
2007-02-22 22:48:40 · answer #8 · answered by Vegas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would be interested in knowing your reasons for thinking he hates you , but as in any marriage that both parties are miserable . its time to do yourselves and each other justice and stop wasting any more time,
2007-02-22 22:49:25 · answer #9 · answered by xx4real4lifexx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk it out,or go to counseling.If he hated you then he would not want to work it out.A lot of times couples try to work it out but its hard b.c. they have so many issues.I suggest you and your husband go to marriage counseling together.
2007-02-22 22:50:14 · answer #10 · answered by TH 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋