Should i drop my morals to fit in with others or should i just be known as a snob?

Question

This is quite a serious question.....I have just started a new job and all the girls-women i work with are loud, brassy, rude, foul mouthed and to be honest the type of people i would avoid like the plague...I really want to keep this job but feel uncomfortable around them. I'm not saying i'm better than they are, just different...i've just been myself, i'm NOT a snob, but i've been brought up with a high standard of what 'i see' as 'right and wrong'..politeness and manners...i know they think of me as a snob...why should i be made to feel as though i'm the one in the wrong, how do i get over it!!??

Answer 1

You are not a snob, you are a very graceful lady. I don't blame for you not wanting to associate or be part of that particular group of people. Remain firm, be polite and smile to them and always in a courtesy manner,asking them how they are and wish them a lovely day, they will eventually realise that you are a very nice person and will come to respect you and probably even defend you should someone say horrible things about you. They might even start correcting their own manners. Some people are just very ignorant and have to have a leader to follow. Perhaps your just the person to show them right path. Kindness over vileness will always win. Be positive, friendly to them and when they start behaving in an unacceptable manner, excuse yourself and walk away. I do know what it is like, as it happens to me all the time. Women can be so cruel and men are horrible because they think that they are not good enough! Who would of thought that good decent manner could bring so many social problems. Wish you all the best.

Answer 2

no way you have been brought up in a manner that teaches politeness manners and ettiquete good on you why should you change to fit in what a waste of education to change. No way stay as you are don't change you are not a snob just more thoughtful of others. You don't need to get over anything they are the ones with the problems let them get over it carry on be yourself you may even educate a few of the other girls allong the way good luck

Answer 3

Be yourself. That's the ONLY way to be. And remember that "majority rules" isn't always right. It's quite possible to be in the minority of something and be perfectly correct.

Just think about it - if you don't respect them, why should you care what they think? Do you care if a crack-ho thinks you're a snob? Same should go for them.

Just be polite - I'm sure you are.

In time you may find that you'll want to move on to more amenable working conditions. Or something else may change. In the meantime, just be you.

Answer 4

Apart from one or two mindless nuggets that have just wrote 'snob' the general concensus is an well argued one...and one i would whole heartedly agree with....i always teach my kids that there are few things that you are in full control of, one of these is your morals and principles and only you should choose to change them. Dont lower your principles and standards just to please others, start doing that and where do you stop? Let people get to know you and vice versa and you may find that you dont have to lower yourself set standards...if it isnt workable you just be polite and pleasant and get on with your work as best as you can...however this doesnt mean be unapproachable or unflexible....it is a very fine line, sometimes its workable and sometimes its not

Answer 5

Be yourself, and dont compromise your belief, conforming to fit in is NEVER good, because you are putting on a false persona for each person you know eventually.

Best way to deal with it is to be yourself, if these people are somewhat intellegent maybe you can discuss your differances in beliefs, if theyr'e not somewhat intellegent, why bother to try?

Just be yourself without being a snob, dont push your beliefs down their throat, but dont compromise what you see as "right and wrong," or politeness, just make sure you're practicing what you are preaching.

Answer 6

Don't go down to their level, please. They really are not worth it. You should try and be a good influence on them. I did this and at least the boys I work with respect me for it. They say I'm more ladylike and polite then any of the others and that makes me feel good about myself. I'm known for being quiet and polite and when important things come up the bosses are more likely to take note of that and use your skills rather than someone who might be obnoxious or rude.

Answer 7

Don't sink to that level.In time, they will see you for the person you are.... a polite person with manners.... and who could possibly find fault with that . That is a rarity in today's crass world; be proud of yourself always! Also, in time, you may see a glimmer of goodness in them. This is a new job and there is always acclimation for the first weeks. Do your job , continue with your same classy persona, and I bet they will come around.

Answer 8

Be yourself, whatever you are, be true to you and do not try and fit in because you have to, that is the road to nowhere. If it means being singled out then do, you will find people will accept you for whoever you are and if they don't find another job because you will just be another sheep that follows the herd. It takes courage being you and Good luck!

Answer 9

Don't judge a book by it's cover, some of these people can be very good and genuine people once you get to know them.

I know how you feel, I once was like that, but just try to get to know them, you can still be yourself but you have to work with them so become friends with them. They just might be more positive people that liek to always be cheerful.

Answer 10

I think that maybe you're not giving these other people much of a chance. Talk to them, you might like them and they may be more like you than you think! Get over yourself for crying out loud.