Would you tell this detail about WHY YOUR HUSBAND LEFT?

Question

My husband is telling people that he left me and the two kids because he was unhappy for all ten years of the marriage. He actually left after he got involved with a woman who lives four blocks away, who is separated but not divorced. He then moved down the street and so the whole thing is in my face daily. I am having a hard time saying to people that he left and then wondering whether to tell people the part about the other woman.

He has since dumped the other woman.

Looks like John has the answer.

Answer 1

Your husband sounds like a complete jerk and the woman down the street deserves what she gets.

Answer 2

Your husband walked out on his wife of 10 years and his children for a fling.

Tell people that, if you want. Dont tell people if you dont want to.

A word of advise though, even if he werent down the street most people would find out anyway. You have no shame in it--he is the one that did not honor his vows or his family.

Your best revenge? Rise above him (which shouldnt be hard) and move on with your life. Be glad you only lost 10 years and not more on such a self indulgent person.

Get a hobby--even a cheep one... or spend time with a charity, such as habitat for humanity.. this will keep your mind off of all teh troubles, will get you out of your home so he doenst think you aer sitting around pining over him, and it will introduce you to new people.

Furthermore, do NOT get into a mudslinging battle with him. It isnt worth the anger.

In regards to your children, do NOT make excuses for him, but DO NOT badmouth him either.

Good luck. I am sorry you have to go through this. Ive been there. I know it hurts.

Answer 3

Your husband is telling people he left because he was unhappy because it is true. People that are happy with their spouses rarely leave them. Not to say it was your fault. At times a spouse that is unhappy in a marriage fail to see their part in making this so. They often seek happiness with someone else, then past mistakes repeat in the new relationship and they wonder why they are unhappy again. Without resolving our mistakes we are sure to repeat them.. Actually it is no body's business as to why you two are not together anymore. You owe no one an explanation, and bashing your ex will gain nothing. People on their own will see for themselves what really took place and why. All you can say to people who ask is, "our marriage was not working so we decided to call it quits". No other explanation is needed. Best of luck to you!

Answer 4

When my husband left me because of another woman I did tell everybody because I felt that he was in the wrong. He told his family I was crazy and a lot of personl stuff that was just supposed to be between us. In a way it helped me to tell people because I had a lot of support and other people were telling me their stories, I even went to a support group at church. I don't know if I would go so public if it happened again but turns out I was with a lot of good people at my job which is in a hospital and they all knew of all the love and support I gave him when had cancer and then he did this to me. If you have good friends then it might help to tell them the truth. Sorry this happened to you but you will come back stronger, I did.

Answer 5

I know you are hurting but it really isn't anyone's business why you guys split up. You can tell family and close friends the truth but if you make it a point to tell the whole world he cheated, you are going to look like a petty, bitter person - you don't want that. It won't be easy but the best thing you can do for you and your 2 kids is move on.

Answer 6

You don't have to explain yourself to anyone. Your husband is just making a fool of himself, and he will continue to do so until you put your foot down and tell him that what he is doing is unacceptable and uncivilized. Too bad in the civilian world you can't get him for adultery. However, if he is in the military, you could go to the co of the base and tell them what is going on to get something done about the situation.

Answer 7

I would say to tell them what you want to tell them. However, both what your husband is saying AND what you are saying could be true. Maybe he was unhappy through your marriage, and then finally started cheating. As a matter of fact, the cheating sounds like proof that he was unhappy. So, maybe what you're upset about is that he omits the affair when he tells his version. Well, that is his prerogative. Your prerogative is to tell your version when you explain the breakup.

Answer 8

What's wrong with telling people the TRUTH? And that is, quite simply......that your husband walked out on his family to be with another woman. Who do you think that will reflect more negatively on? You for not being a good enough wife to keep him? Or him for walking out on his family to be with a woman who's not even divorced yet?

Answer 9

I say don't tell them anything at all!

It's your business. Keep it to yourself. That's personal information that no one needs to know but you and your ex. If they find out from a rumour or something, so be it. Set them straight if the rumour is twisted though.

But don't explain anything to anybody unless it's soley your decision to do so. Cause frankly - it's nobody's business but yours.

Hope this helped, and wish ya the best with whatever you choose to do!

Answer 10

Did he leave and then meet her...do you know the timing of this? Is there any truth to his claims of being unhappy for 10 years? If so, then there may be in his mind justification and the girl was post departure. I would be honest with yourself here and ask why he left before you consider chastising him for leaving for another woman. If you can be honest and he literally left you and your family for another woman....and you can find no rational reason for his departure...THEN GO FOR THE JUGULAR - just keep the kids out of it.

Answer 11

Would you tell this detail about WHY YOUR HUSBAND LEFT?