I have a 14 yr old neice. I just found out that she has been trying to get pregnant. I told her mom and everything and she has been taking her to a counselor but nothing seems to be helping. She has her mind set on getting pregnant. I tried to explain to her that she still has a long future ahead of her and to not try to grow up too fast.... any suggestions??
2007-02-22 07:05:09 · 43 answers · asked by cheesepoofies07 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
have her watch a child if its possible. that usually is a ''wake up'' call for younger girls who want a child. i know it worked with even my friend whos 23 and wanted one. lol she watched my twins and was like ''um maybe i'll wait.'' so thats just suggestion. nothing you SAY can make her change her mind, because you can't MAKE her. but if you give her little things, such as that to show her how hard it is, she will wake up. not saying for long periods of time, but just short ones, they are a lot of work, and normally that is noticeable to a 14 year old (they will get really overwhelmed, my lil sis is 14 and cant watch my lil ones on her own, or my 9 month old newphew for long extended periods of time without gettin stressed).
2007-02-22 07:11:36 · answer #1 · answered by ricleigh 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try and find out why she wants to get pregnant. Is it because she wants a guy to stay with her? Is it because she wants a "baby doll" to love and hug?
If it's the baby doll reason, try getting her a puppy or other needy pet. Maybe see if you can get her a real dose of what it's like to have a baby by offereing to babysit a young baby overnight. Oversee what she does but make sure she has to do all of the work (like getting up 6 times a night, changing diapers) and then have her go to school the next morning. If you can't "borrow" a baby, try a simulation of having a newborn with a doll. I hear there are dolls you can rent or buy that cry to simulate the needs of a real baby (ie. they'll only stop if rocked, fed, burped, etc.) I think a dose of reality should cure it.
2007-02-22 07:12:09 · answer #2 · answered by army of me 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Expalin to her if she really wanted a child she would wait until she was able to look after that child herself, its not easy having kids, no matter what age you are, never mind 14.
Show her some childbirth footage, and stratchmarks, and so on.
All else fails, wake her up every hour and winge for an hour and continue this for a few nights she will soon think its not a good idea.
2007-02-22 07:13:54 · answer #3 · answered by hayles 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call Maury and get her on the show. LOL
All joking aside, do you know anyone who has an infant or baby under a year old? If so, maybe you can get your friend to allow your niece to take care fo the baby for a full day. Once your niece gets the full impact of just what it means to care for a demanding baby, it should convince her that she's nowhere ready to have one of her own yet.
Good luck.
2007-02-22 07:10:48 · answer #4 · answered by Kristen K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh I'm 15, so maybe this helps. firstly tell her that the chances are she'll be ditched by her babies father, so when they baby grows up it aint gonna be happy, cuz it'll be dad-less, every child deserves to grow up in a stable home with mum AND dad present (though that doesn't really work anymore), secondly, her friends will ditch her, probably anyway. She won't get to go out to the cinema and shoppin and all with a baby. thirdly people will call her really mean names. and thats a guarantee. And fourthly, she could be a grndma in her 30's..thats just wierd..hope that helped!!
2007-02-22 07:12:14 · answer #5 · answered by cheri s 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh god. Why are 14 year olds even having sex? Make her watch a video of a woman giving birth. Not that censored crap on TLC, but a real video of full-on stretched vagina and epesiotomy bleeding and woman in great pain. My mom's got a lovely home video she swears is birth control for any teenage girl. I don't know where to find one online, but most OBGYNs have one to show moms what to expect. GOod luck!
2007-02-22 07:12:56 · answer #6 · answered by grayhare 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The best thing would be for her to see a 14/15/16 year old on a postnatal ward who has had to have an emergency caesarean section that would definitely put her off! I would explain or ask a new first time mum (any age) to talk to her about what it is like. Do you know why she wants to get pregnant? Is she unhappy at home/school and think this is a way out? See if there is a specialist teenager pregnancy midwife at your local maternity unit (most units have them now) who could talk to her or direct you to a local group where she could meet up with other teenagers who had the same idea and see if that puts her off.
2007-02-25 09:45:07 · answer #7 · answered by LAURENCE B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have her mom put her on birth control, regardless. something that she can't skip (maybe the shot? not the pill or patch that she can take off or throw away).
14 yr olds tend to think they know their situatin better than anyone, so i doubt she'll listen. i like the puppy idea though! and videos, show her birthing videos, not the baby story type tv shows, the real thing!! talk to planned parenthood--they may have something to help also. perhaps talking to a kid her age that DID have a kid about how hard it is & the sacrifices she's had to make would help.
good luck!!
2007-02-22 07:18:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
See if there is a teen pregnancy group that she can go and see other teens who had babies and listen to their stories or their regrets. Another thing is that if you know of anyone who has a small baby have her stay with them for a week and see just how much fun it really is.
I'm not sure what she will get out of having a baby at such an early age. Perhaps,she's searching to love something or feel loved, there is something going on but she's just not ready to let anyone in on it. Keep the counseling or find a different one (she may not want to open up to the current one). Good luck.
2007-02-22 07:18:26 · answer #9 · answered by trojan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have her babysit a baby around 2-3 months old (and really attatched to their mother) for 24 hours and see how she thinks she can handle it.
2007-02-22 07:13:43 · answer #10 · answered by Susie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋