feeling helpless?! can anyone help?

Question

Im currently 35 weeks pregnant. I was forced to switch jobs due to sexual harrassment when i was 14 weeks along(which is better for me now :) The only problem is now i dont have maturnity leave or pay. My husband is a police officer and there is NO WAY we can make it on his salary alone......i have sold my car back in Dec. To help save that way...I have been trying to find a job where i can work from home with my baby. I tried applying to nanny for other moms but NOBODY wants someone who has a new born.
HELP any suggestions. I know i would be fine watching other ppls kids while i have one of my own as well. Im trying to pack money away to get us through the first month and a half but after that i know we will be screwed for money for groceries......can any one help us? what can i do??

TO SEXY B-

For your information it was not selfish of me to switch jobs....it would have been more stressfull and harmful to my health to stay there and i took a pay raise when i changed jobs by $2.
Also, my internet is through my job now...we dont even have that at home.
We dont and never have had cable.
I think you can take your rude comment and shove it.

Answer 1

This is probably a simple answer and you've most likely tried this already, but I'll put it out there anyway-

Have you tried talking to the HR department? The reason I ask is this - I started a new job in October. In November I found out I was already 2 months pregnant. Whoops! So I talked to my boss and the HR department and they were more than willing to work with me and still offer me maternity leave (even though I'm not technically covered by FMLA.) It can't hurt to ask, right? Your new job might be willing to work with you and you might be pleasantly surprised.

Answer 2

I know how you feel. I don't get any maternity whatsoever...I don't even qualify for FMLA so my leave is UNPAID and UNPROTECTED....my husband is a PhD candidate and makes a stipend of $24,000 a year....but we live in the Washington DC metro area (which is a DAMN expensive place to live). I am having the same fears as you. And besides the fact that we desperately NEED my paycheck, I'm the one getting the health insurance through my job since my husband is a student...if I'm fired while on maternity then I lose health insurance for my family.

We sold my car, we live in a 650 sq foot apartment, we're doing everything we can to make it....with a baby coming in May it can be extremely nervewracking.

Unfortunately, it sounds like you might be in the same situation as me...I have to go back to work after only a few weeks (probably no more than 4 weeks off). It's horrible and stressful and I cry about it all the time...but I HAVE to go back to work immediately. If there were plenty of ways to work at home and be with my baby I would do it...but unfortunately there aren't that many options...

You can try caring for other children...but you should check out your local government regulations. I know where I live you need a permit if you watch more than 3 (I think) children that are not your own.

Most people today must be a dual income family...it's extremely difficult to afford to stay home...you might just have to go back to work until you can afford to stay at home later.

Best of luck.

Answer 3

I believe this is an HR issue. If you were comfortable and had a maternity leave at your old job but was forced to leave due to sexual harassment, I would go explain the situation to your Human Res sources specialist. Try going to your local food bank and maybe you could ask for help from friends, family and your church. If you can't take a year off, maybe try looking to take only 6 months off and returning to work sooner. Also, look to see if there are any some government programs that could help you with things like diapers and formula. All just ideas. Good luck to you.

Answer 4

I have to tell you, caring for other people's children when you have a newborn will not work. You're going to be more exhausted than you can imagine trying to cope with your baby and your body/emotions as they try to settle out of pregnancy mode.

So, that leaves you with making do on what your hubby makes. Have you looked over your budget and cut out absolutely everything that isn't necessary (cable TV, less expensive cell phone plan, packing lunches rather than eating out, etc)? Is moving somewhere less expensive an option?

I worked for United Way at one time and there are a lot of agencies that may be able to provide assistance. Check with your local United Way office, they can point you in the right direction. Good luck!

Answer 5

u didnt say where u were from, in england if you are not eligable for maternity leave or pay they do a maternity benefit which is less money, but you would be entitled to it. they also have a grant of about £500 to help you buy all the baby stuff u need, then theres the tax credits, child benefit and milk & veg tokens.
Im so sorry you are in this situation and i just hope u live in the uk cos you will be entitled to all this if not my answer is completley useless. Good Luck with everything. x

Answer 6

You shouldn't worry so much .There are lots of people willing to help out if you really need groceries.Just work for as long as you can then spend some time with your new baby.You might have to cut things to the basic needs for a while ,but everything should be ok.Most towns have a food bank that help people with food,when they are low on cash.I don't know where you live but most states offer what they call the wic program for pregnant mothers and their babies . Its kinda like a nutrition program that makes sure people who don't make much money can eat like they should.You should check it out at your local Department of family and children services.,or welfare department,whatever it may be called where you live. It may be hard but don't worry I know everything will work out for you. Good luck

Answer 7

i dont know what to tell you except buy store brand everything, look for sales, dont buy anything you dont absolutely need, get him to direct deposit his check i know with wells fargo you can get direct deposit advance while they charge you money you get money when you need it, try for assistance or wic, but i know how you feel right now you feel that its your fault for switching jobs and i think that unless it was that horrible you couldnt take it would rather kill your self than be exposed to sexual harrasment then fine but you coulda stuck it out got the paid maternity leave and then found a differnt job while on maternity leave and quit the previous company at the end of maternity leave without loosing money, im not trying to make you feel worse but things happen for a reason and sometimes you just got to do things for others not your self but now the cost is going to be generic things and nothing that you dont need like just because the lamp is old dont go buy a new one stash away money even if its coins, having to live paycheck to paycheck can be disheartening and make you feel hopeless but if it was realy that hard then a lot of people wouldnt be making it now
personally i was in the similar boat i got pregnant couldnt find a job and we lived paycheck to paycheck with the direct advance to get groceries or only paid half of the light bill at a time it may be time for you to cut the internet save money there downgrade the cable to basic get rid of things that cost you a bunch of money each month and live on the basics until you get back on your feet it may be a while but even then it will be in the past and you will survive just remeber big money expenses get rid of and generic everything should help

Answer 8

I am so sorry that you are going through this. Just please don't stress yourself out, it's not good. Is there any way that your husband can pick up another job to help with money? There are also many government agencies & programs out there to help people in your situation. Did you get on the WIC program? They will help with groceries immensely. Good luck to you, just remember that things always have a way of working themselves out. Hang in there.

Answer 9

If you have vacation days you could use some of those... You'll just have to cut your budget and try and get along with things that you don't need. Also have a nice big list of things you need for your shower. Hopefully the poeple around you will see that you maybe in a financial bind and help you when then can.

Answer 10

You should try to apply for some help, such as food stamps or other programs for people w/ low income, at least till you get back on your feet. Hope that helps & Good Luck!