So, like I've been saying for days, I'm moving to Texas. (Today!!!) And I'm transferring with my job. (It's just retail, so I don't find it all that important)
Anyways, my new manager is seemingly in constant communication with me. He's forever texting and calling me, and going on about how work will be different with a female present. (I work in a store where women generally don't)
Well, today he called and he's like, I don't want to seem forward or weird, but I wanted to know if on Saturday night we could meet up and have dinner so I can get to know you a little better and you can get to know me.
And ya know, that's cool. I'm alright with that. But I asked if I could bring my boyfriend and Dad (since my Dad is driving all the way from Illinois to help me move) with so I wouldn't have to leave them behind.
And he's like, well, I'd rather just get to know you...
Maybe I'm reading this wrong?
2007-02-22 02:49:24 · 12 answers · asked by Miranda 3 in Business & Finance ➔ Careers & Employment
If you go to dinner, and you have already made up your mind that this guy is trying to hit on you, anything this guy does will be wrong! Give him the benefit of the doubt. Afterall, he is not hiring your bf and your family - just you, so it makes sense not to invite everybody. Plus, it gives you an excuse to leave early!
I admit Saturday night dinner has all kinds of connotations, but maybe that's the only time he can meet you. As you know, retailers can keep long hours on the job. Since you are working for him, and not the other way around, it would be impolite to turn him down (the meeting not a dinner date) unless you had a very good reason.
He is the boss, so you have to be careful not to misinterpret his motives. However, he has no right to assume the two of you will have any realationship other than manager/employee.
Why do you think he has designs on your bod? Is he single? Are you both the same age? Have you met this guy face-to-face and had the feeling he was attracted to you? Do you trust yourself with this guy?
Anyway, assuming the previous messages and phone calls were NOT suggestive or sexual, cut him some slack and agree to a very quick dinner meeting.....
2007-02-22 03:36:20 · answer #1 · answered by Chef dad 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you're reading it wrong at all and I'd certainly be a bit cautious with this guy. He's way too forward for my taste.
He could honestly just want to get to know you. However, if that's the case, he shouldn't have a problem with your father and boyfriend coming along.
I would tell him that you would just be more comfortable with them there. Make sure he understands that they will pay their own way and you're not expecting him to pay for their dinner. If he has a problem with that then I would seriously consider looking for new employment. This guy is a bit weird for my taste.
By the way, since you are transferring to a new state, this must be a national company with a home office and HR department. Is there someone you can talk to in HR? They might want to politely warn this guy about sexual harassment.
2007-02-22 02:57:02 · answer #2 · answered by Faye H 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, your reading it right. Be upfront with him. Let him know politely, but firmly, that you do not intend to have a romantic relationship with him. Do not be ambiguous. Suggest a business lunch so he can get to know you professionally. An evening outing will easily be construed as a date. Don't let him push you with the whole "I'm your boss" thing. That is very illegal. Good luck.
2007-02-22 02:55:04 · answer #3 · answered by SA16 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yeah that is a little odd.... i'd suggest lunch instead. good job at bringing up the point that you have a bf. i would say don't get hostile and take everything as the boss is hitting on you, but beware, because it sure sounds like it. i would suggest lunch instead, like i mentioned before. definately don't let the boss pay for you. good luck!
2007-02-22 02:53:42 · answer #4 · answered by jpcjulia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are. This guy is asking you out on a date. And since you have a boyfriend, you shouldn't go. You need to tell another manager higher up about this because that is sexual harassment. Don't answer his phone calls and let him know you are not interested.
2007-02-22 03:35:37 · answer #5 · answered by L 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, I'd say you know exactly whats going on. He want's in your pants or he wouldn't be that interested and he wouldn't care if you're boy friend and father showed up.
2007-02-22 02:55:09 · answer #6 · answered by Third Uncle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stick with your gut feeling---where will it end.( is he married) then the answer will be No. You will get a bad name ( a slapper) that is what work hours are for--to get to know your staff.do as he says all the time or you will be out of a job.Stand up to him,I WONDER WHAT HAPPENED TO HIS LAST STAFF.the choice is yours.good luck.
2007-02-22 03:00:13 · answer #7 · answered by mother 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hello, quick promotion?
besides what's wrong with a boss that takes the time to learn about his employees. people are so p.c. these days! :P
if you do go, wear a mini skirt and a thong.
2007-02-22 02:54:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you it seems that this guy is looking for a little more than a working relationship
2007-02-22 02:53:27 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'd say start looking for another job ASAP. This guy sounds like someone that likes to abuse his power.
2007-02-22 03:00:27 · answer #10 · answered by rafa922 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋