Would a replica doll of your dead baby make you feel any better?

Question

I have just read a news artical about a woman who makes replica dolls of a baby who has died, by coping a photo,
Do you think this is right,
Should'nt you greave, and try to come to terms with a loss of a baby
Please give me your thoughts

Answer 1

The bottom line is that people have different ways of grieving.

When I lost my baby, I turned to massive amounts of alcohol. Was this right? Proably not and it served for numerous headaches and calls into work. The turning point for me was when I hid a capsule of hydrocodone in my pocket, so that I could take it later with a few doses of liquor. The fates stepped in and I ended up forgetting about the pill and danced in the rain... and the pill disolved in my pocket. At that moment, I knew I had hit rock bottom and decided to pull myself out of my hole.

If women need that "doll" to grieve and to heal then let them be. It's when they start confusing dreams with reality that it begins to be a problem.

I'm not saying the way I grieved was right and I am not saying that putting a doll in place of a child is right. What I am saying is that no one can tell a person how to grieve. Some people join support groups, clubs, or start working more... and that's fine, but no one thing works for everyone and people should understand that.

Just remember, losing a child is the most devastating situation any woman may go through... and with a loss of such proportions sometimes people will go to extremes to make that pain go away... here's to hoping that they take the steps to mend their hearts though.

Good question.

Answer 2

It must be a devastating thing, to lose a baby .
It is a tragedy , which is very hard to come to terms with,
for both the father and the mother

I really can't imagine, how i would cope .

But to your question .
I do know of some bereaved couples,

Given the opportunity, to cuddle their dead baby
and be given a photograph, of their child ,
is a real comfort to them .
a proper funeral, is also a big part, of the grieving process.

Time and support ,from each other, can gradually ease the loss .

I do not believe anyone can "get over " the death of a child ,
even a tiny baby"
You just learn to live, with that grief,
and get on with your life, as best you can .

The doll idea ,
is new to me and seems wrong and bizarre ,
I fail to see how it could help . ( only reinforce the tragedy)
that would be a constant reminder, that your baby was dead .
I do not think , IMO ,it is a good or natural way
to manage a bereavement .

My heart goes out, to any parents faced with this situation .
xx

Answer 3

When I was 30 I was in a doll store buying my daughter a very expensive life like doll for Christmas. They we're beautiful!! It wasvso amazing that I picked another one up while hers was being wrapped. It was like holding a real newborn baby. Everything but the smell. I ended up buying myself a cheaper version. I loved it, clothed it occasionally, kept it in a cradle. Sometimes just to pretend again that I had a newborn. I knew she wasn't real, I had little problems giving her to my knew niece a couple of years later. If a woman wanted a replica to remember, what's the harm. Other people take their babies home, love them, photograph them all of their life. Its pretty much a one shot deal to get a picture if your baby dies. This way she could have a life size model, all of her life. If they could do it with a 3d printer, all the better. A full size picture. A wonderful thing!!!

Answer 4

Does this woman charge the grieving parents money for this? If so it seems wrong to make a profit out of others grief, (although funeral directors, florists and card companies have been doing it for years - not quite the same I know).

Everyone grieves differently and there is no 'right' or 'wrong' to it and whatever helps has to be a good thing? Not sure it's something I'd choose but then I've never had to deal with the death of a baby (and never want to either).

Answer 5

It is a little Norman Bates. What next, a full bown replica of your dead mother sitting in the lounge.
The bereaved need counselling and comfort, this doll will not give them closure. They may become preoccupied with it and never have more children or neglect any they already have. At the very worst it could encourage mental illness. Its very sad ... and eerie.

Answer 6

That sounds horrible like she is playing on their grief. I would not want that, a photo would be enough, a friend lost a baby and they gave her a photo at the hospital but three yeatrs later she hasnt opened the envelope containing the pic, she now has a healthy baby. She says she may feel strong enough one day.

Answer 7

It wouldn't be something I would consider doing to help me through my grief, but I do know that everyone grieves in their own way & in their own time. So if it helps a woman get through a traumatic time in her life, then it is right for her. Losing a child is a devastating experience & a person needs to do whatever makes them feel right. No one can say what they would do or how they would feel until they've actually been there.

Answer 8

i my self has lost a baby and i think it is so sick for someone to be making these dolls
i have my memories and photos that is all i want not a doll
you should be able to greave in peace not people making money out of your loss of a so much wanted and innocent baby

Answer 9

Whilst I dont think its right to make money out of a baby dying, some people might find that this helps them.

It is a bit weird to actually start up this kind of business, has this woman ever lost a baby and maybe she thought this would help her?

Answer 10

I read this myself and find the whole idea quite frankly disturbing ... u can never replace the loss of a child with a doll .... this is a disgusting money making scheme praying on people who have suffered a loss ... its traumatic enough ... let them grieve .. its sickening and shouldn't be allowed ....