you think of my Grandma saying that she no longer wants to speak to her again.We have a small family and I have not actually told her I dont want to speak to her any more but I don't call her anymore or have much contact after we all found this out .
My other question is how would you handle this situation ?
Do you know anyone who has also done what my sister did?
2007-02-22 02:20:15 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
What would you do if you were in me and my Grandmas shoes??
2007-02-22 02:20:59 · update #1
Tell her husband, help him get a bloodthirsty attorney here in the states and make sure he gets EVERYTHING in the divorce!!
then KICK HER *** TO THE CURB!!!
And tell her exactly why, tell her that this family doesn't need any whore's in it!!! Seven guys, what Else would you call her?
I don't care if she is your sister, she is immoral and devoid of any character, integrity, self respect, or honor, and I don't know about you but there is NO REASON WHAT SO EVER that I would want someone like around me... ever!
2007-02-22 03:20:20 · answer #1 · answered by David P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Her husband needs to know as soon as he returns, and it is unlikely that she will tell him. If you or anyone in your small family can contact him, you should do so when he gets back; he doesn't need the added distraction while fighting for his life.
However, I concede that I know nothing about the relationship between your sister and her husband; there may be personal issues that you or her hadn't mentioned. I'm not saying that cheating should ever be supported, but if some of it is HIS fault (for example, if he's known to be unfaithful and untrustworthy), then perhaps alienating her from the small family isn't the answer. She may feel that he's not keeping his pants on or he treated her poorly or that he abandoned her by going to war (something she really should have considered before the wedding).
They both need a lot of help, but you can't make her do anything. You know the situation better than I do, but as soon as you can, you and your grandmother need to tell her that you find this behavior unacceptable and you will not condone her actions by keeping quiet. Don't cut her off from her potential support group, but let her know that her husband will hear about it the week he comes back; either your sister tells him or you do.
Just make sure he doesn't kill her when he finds out. Seriously. I'd be tempted to if I was him and risking my life fighting for my country in a war I don't believe in so I can survive just long enough to go home to my cheating whore of a wife.
2007-02-22 02:41:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a wife of a husband that served our country, I am very disappointed that this was a question. To simply put it, HELL NO. First, your husband is fighting for every freedom you have as a citizen of the United States. He faces danger seen and unseen. You have to idea or sympathy what he's going through. Not only, is he under attack physically, but also mentally. My husband now has PTSD. I even think that you considering cheating is HEARTLESS! Apparently, your marriage vows didn't mean very much to you or did they? It's not about whether he finds out. It's about doing what's right. You are the only person that have to live with you. May God keep our soldiers!
2016-05-23 22:56:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I live on an Army post and you can't believe how much cheating actually goes on when the men go to Iraq. These women have no shame and flaunt it for everyone to see. THere is some justice to a degree. One story I will tell you is there was a guy that was parking on our street seeing a married woman regularly whose husband was known to us to be in Iraq. My neighbor friends got so fed up with this outright adultery and put rotten fish guts in his car. He never came back. or at least never parked his car on our street again.
I can't imagine being in Iraq, risking my life, working my butt off, seeing so much death and destruction, looking forward to talking to my family and keeping some connection and hope of a life that seems so far away, but when you get home, you re freaking wife has either packed the house and left, or has an STD. My husband told me a few stories of what some wives did to the soldiers in his unit while they were in Iraq. Somehow I hope he will find out. It's wrong and he needs to know. So he can move on with his life.
You ask how I would handle the situation, since you're not talking to your sister anyway, you could write him a letter, or e-mail him. You can mail an anonomous letter to him if you don't want her to know exactly who told. Good luck and I'm glad to know that soldier in Iraq has someone standing for him. He needs it.
2007-02-22 02:46:35 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can see you a re truly worried about your sister. But you have to remember that her behavior has nothing to do with you or with the love she has for you or your grandmother. Would you want your grandma to disown you if you develop a drinking problem? or what if you get into drugs? Your sister's need for love is human and although I am not condoning it, this is her business and her only. You should stand by her side no matter what and maybe try to her out. It's not easy losing a spouse for a long time and not having sex. Don't abandon her now, she already feels abandoned by her husband.
2007-02-22 02:30:33 · answer #5 · answered by V S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I am a soldier deployed right now to Afghanistan and I don't think that I would like it too much. I would have to say leave her. My wife wants to separate. We were married four months and she left me. She says she can't do this. I know it has hurt me alot. I guess I would cry because that is where you expect most of your support. I mean as a soldier we are backing up not only the United States but other countries now and for this stuff to go on back home kills us. It happens to a lot of us soldiers. We are fighting a war here and losing a battle at home. Pray for us all.
2007-02-22 02:29:45 · answer #6 · answered by david r 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all I want to thank your Brother-In-Law for is service there are people that respect and appreciate what he is doing right now. I don't want to judge your sister since i don't know her but you should talk to her and try to get to the bottom of this why she is doing this to not only to her husband but to her self she could get a STD with having so many different men she could get pregnant then what would she do and she is only degrading her self with the way she is acting. I also think her husband has the right to know what is going on he is out there not only doing this for him self but for his wife trying to have a better future for his "family", I think it would be better to wait until he comes home unless there is no other choose but to tell him now just so he doesn't have to add another problem with everything he is doing right now. For V.S. i don't know why you said that he abandon her when she got married she knew what she was getting her self into marrying someone in the military and its not like he wanted to leave her he has no choose but go where he is station at but don't you think he might feel abandon and guilty for leaving his wife. I hope everything works out in the end i wish your brother-in-law the best and i hope your sister knows what she is doing is only going to hurt the people she loves and herself.
2007-02-22 05:16:02 · answer #7 · answered by Jeanette 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this was my family and my sister, I would let my sister know what I thought about her and then just leave her alone. She can do whatever she wants with her life, she'll probably end up lonely and miserable and it'll be her fault. I wouldn't interfer unless my interferrence is wanted or I really felt speaking up was the right thing to do.
2007-02-22 02:27:57 · answer #8 · answered by cgc17788 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How would I handle it? I would tell her that she has no respect for her husband or their relationship, and that if she doesn't tell him, you will. I also agree with the first answerer about std's. She is putting herself and her husband in jeopardy for getting them. This poor man HAS to know. Not telling him would be wrong. What she did was horrible. Tell her exactly how you and your Grandma feel. I did know someone who did this to their husband(though he was not in the military). To this day, she still sleeps with multiple men(she is divorced). I find it disgusting and I have nothing to do with her. It's like they are never satisfied with any man or have no qualms with sleeping with other womens men. It's gross! Tell her and then tell him. Good luck!
2007-02-22 03:07:03 · answer #9 · answered by looloo1122 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Judge not lest ye be judged....oh hell , how can you not judge that !! Let me say this, for every decision we make in life, there are consequences. Your sister knows that too, she can not possibly expect you and grandma to condone this immoral behavior. I'd let her know exactly how I feel , no holds barred.
2007-02-22 02:28:21 · answer #10 · answered by EGOman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋