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2007-02-22 00:29:26 · 26 answers · asked by steven g 2 in Arts & Humanities Philosophy

26 answers

It is for us to learn how love people unconditionally, without selfish false attachments.

Please Patiently read this. Thank You.

*What in the world is the difference between loving a person, and being attached to them? Love is the sincere wish, for others to be happy and to be free from suffering. Having realistically realized other’s kindness, as well as their faults, Love is Always focused on the other person’s welfare. We have no ulterior intensions or motives to fulfill our own self-interests; or to fulfill our own desires, we love others, all people, simply because they exist. Attachment, on the other hand, exaggerates others’ good qualities, and makes us crave to be with them. When we’re with them, we are happy, but when we’re separated from them, we’re miserable. Attachments are always linked with expectations of what others should be, or what they should do for us. Is love, as it is understood in most societies, really love OR attachment ? Let us examine this a little more. Generally speaking, we are attracted {drawn to) people because they have qualities we value, or because they help us in some way. If we carefully observe, through introspection, our own thought processes we’ll notice that we very often look for specific qualities in others. Some of these qualities we are drawn to are qualities within our parents, or qualities which society values.
We examine someone’s looks, education, social status, financial status, and so forth. This is how Most of us decide on whether or not the person holds any true value, or not. In addition, we judge people as worthwhile according to how they relate to us. If they praise us, encourage us, help us, if they listen to what we have to say, if they make us feel secure, if they take care of us when were sick, unhappy or depressed, we consider them good, or sometimes righteous people, and these are the people we more drawn to, whom we are most likely attracted to, and the people we choose to be around with.
In all honesty, this is very biased, for we are judging them, only in terms of how they relate to us, as if we are the most important person in the world & thinking the world revolves around us! After we’ve judged certain people to be good for us, whenever we see them, it appears to us as if goodness is radiating out from within them, but as we are more mindfully aware, we realize that we have projected this goodness on to them.
Desiring to be the people who make us feel good, we become emotional yo-yo’s, when we’re with these people, we’re up, but when we’re not with them, we’re down. Furthermore, we form fixed concepts of what our relationships with these people will be, and thus have expectations of them. “When they do not live up to our expectations of them, we’re unhappy, disappointed or may even become angry. We want them to change so that they will match what we think they are. But our projections and expectations come from our own minds, not from other people. Our problems arise not because others aren’t who we thought they were, but because we mistakenly thought they were something they were not. We often use a type of Checklist also. Checklist: “I Love You IF ___________ !” This Love is Conditional and what we call love, is most often attachment. It is actually an attitude which overestimates the qualities of another person.
’Then we cling tightly to that person, thinking our peace and happiness depends on that person. We even often blame that person for our unhappiness.’ Love, on the other hand, is a very patient, calm, optimistic and relaxed attitude. We want others to be free from suffering and to be happy simply because they exist. While attachments are uncontrolled, and too emotionally sentimental, Love is Patient, powerful, and controlled(disciplined). Attachment obscures our judgment {our ability to make sound, wise decisions), and we become impatient, angry, and impartial – helping our dear ones, and those who do us no harm. Love clarifies our mind, & we access a situation by thinking of the greatest good for everyone. Attachment is based on selfishness, while love is founded on valuing, & cherishing others, even those who do not look very appealing to us. Love always looks beyond all the superficial appearances and dwells on the fact that they are just like us: they want peace of mind, happiness, and wish to avoid suffering. If we see an unattractive, or unintelligent people we most often feel repulsed, because our selfish minds want to find attractive, intelligent, and talented people. On the other hand, Love never evaluates others by theses superficial standards and looks much deeper into the person. Love recognizes that regardless of the others appearances, they’re experiences are they same as ours: they want inner mental peace, happiness, and wish to be from suffering. When we’re attached, we’re not mentally, emotionally, & spiritually free. For we overly depend on, and cling to another person, to fulfill our emotional, mental, and spiritual needs. We fear losing the person, fearing that we’d be incomplete without them.” This does Not mean that we should suppress all our emotional needs, or become aloof, and totally independent, for that too would not solve the problem. We must simply realize our unrealistic needs and slowly, gently and patiently – seek to eliminate them. If we try to suppress them, pretending they do not exist, we become insecure, anxious, or possibly depressed. In this case, we do our best to fulfill our needs, while simultaneously working gradually to subdue them. The core problem is that most of us seek to be loved, rather than to love. We yearn to be understood by others, rather than to understand them. Our sense of emotional insecurities comes from the selfish obscuring of our own minds. We develop confidence by recognizing our inner potential to become a Selfless human being, having many magnificent qualities, and then we’ll develop and have an accurate perception of ourselves, gaining self-confidence. We’ll seek to increase true unconditional love, to increase compassion, to cultivate patience, as well as generosity, right concentration and wisdom. Under the influence of attachment, we’re bound by our unstable emotional reactions to others. When they’re nice to us, we’re happy, but when they ignore us or speak sharply to us, we take it personally, and are unhappy. But pacifying attachment doesn’t mean we become hard-hearted, rather without attachments, there will be space in our hearts and minds for genuine affection and impartial love for them. And as a result, we’ll be more actively involved with them. As we learn to transform our minds & lives, through subduing our attachments, we can definitely have successful friendships, and personal relationships with others. These relationships will be richer, more meaningful because of the freedom and respect the relationships are based on. We’ll really care about the happiness and misery of all human beings equally, simply because everyone is the same inside: we all want inner peace of mind, Happiness, and to be from suffering.
However, of course, our lifestyles and interests may be a bit more compatible with some people. Our friendships and our personal relationships will be based on mutual interests, and to help other people. Having such an attitude, we’ll be much More Patient, & tolerant toward others; will remain mentally calm, having Peace of Mind and Happiness, and we’ll communicate successfully with others in life.*

2007-02-22 05:39:11 · answer #1 · answered by Thomas 6 · 0 1

It is probably nothing. It prob has no meaning whatsoever. To each person individually however, it must have a meaning or there would be no point carrying on during the tough times. But as someone once said to me you only have two choices get on with it or give up. I do enjoy my full life, I would like more money but that is the only area I could improve. Family wise its great. Not to say i have everyone, my mum died 10 years ago but that is part of life too.

2007-02-22 08:42:02 · answer #2 · answered by babyshambles 5 · 0 0

. The meaning of life for every individual is different. Life is a journey that you've got to draw lessons from until you die and that's it. Even if you are a born again Christian and have the Bible as a guideline, you've still got lots to figure out as you go through life's journey. So I say to tall those people - there's no easy way out. Find intellectual stuff to delve into, stay as positive as you possible can, surround yourself with positive things and people, keep seeking knowledge.

2007-02-22 10:44:50 · answer #3 · answered by Slim Shady 5 · 0 0

42

2007-02-22 08:36:55 · answer #4 · answered by karen. 4 · 0 0

A film by Monty Python - It's very funny but not as good as the Holy Grail or the Life of Brian

2007-02-22 08:32:56 · answer #5 · answered by crazylady 6 · 1 0

Life – it has a meaning and loving purpose - you just have to find your purpose and live it.

I believe every person is here for a definite purpose. Each person is special and valuable; that refers to me, you, your family, friends, in fact everybody! There is a loving plan for each of our lives here on earth and there is no such thing as coincidence. I don't believe that anything in life happens by chance and that every aspect of our lives points to something deeper.

You need to decide now to live for God rather than for yourself. You spend your life on Earth preparing yourself (as best you can) for death. I don't see death as a scary, negative experience, but birth into a bliss filled eternal life with God. I believe that this is something you have to consciously choose or not during your life on earth.

The meaning of life is for us to discover that we are true children of an infinitely loving God, to find out what our responsibilities are to our Creator, and to fulfill those responsibilities. Each of us is called to affirm, accept and develop the talents God has given us. -

2007-02-22 11:37:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I don't think life has a meaning (unless you mean the scientific one, any living organisim has a few things in common... I think it's 5, don't remember them, something about evolving or something...)

life simply is. it is the collective name given to what it is you are living. you are living your life, but really you are just living.

does that make sense to you?

it does in my head...

2007-02-22 08:38:46 · answer #7 · answered by Mogli 2 · 0 0

Why do you think life must have a sens, life is a thing to live, See Voltaire's "Candide" after a trip to see and understand, the hero, Candide, arrive to this conclusion "You must look after your garden" (hope my translation is good enough)

2007-02-22 08:44:46 · answer #8 · answered by new_bell_pete 3 · 0 0

now theres two of these on page one.
there is no meaning to the phenomena life in general, it is the precondition for there to be any kind of organism capable of recognising meaning therefore we must consider the existance of life as necessary data relating to the background of any question about meanings.

2007-02-22 08:35:18 · answer #9 · answered by richard 3 · 0 1

There are 859 reasons already listed if you type your question as it is into the "Search for questions" box - but my personal favourite answer is 42 - on the basis that if it's good enough for Monty Python it's good enough for me!

2007-02-22 08:49:34 · answer #10 · answered by Richard E 6 · 0 0

the meaning of life is to live ... the purpose though is to continue

2007-02-22 08:37:21 · answer #11 · answered by wolfwagon2002 5 · 0 0

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