My wife is saying that she is very unhappy because the only fun we have is when we go out or go on holiday. She is constantly refering to when we first met and how exciting and loving it was and how she wishes she could turn the clock back as things just aren't the same.
I love her deeply but should I just let her go if she's that unhappy?
2007-02-21 23:54:14 · 25 answers · asked by Nathaniel 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
why not give her what she wants..
start sweeping her off her feet.. :)
send her some flowers to her work.. she'll love it i bet
who doesn't like to get flowers at work to make all the other ladies jealous.. :)
2007-02-21 23:56:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is what she is saying the truth? Get off the couch and make life more interesting for the both of you. People get in their comfortable ruts, which is normal, however a rut is actually very boring. And, from what you wrote, she is reflecting back to when the two of you were courting. What you need to do, is to spice things up. Take a class together; whether it be a cooking class, or a dance class and get out and date each other at least once a week. Turn the TV and computer off. Get creative, but, don't do anything that would make her feel uncomfortable. And, communicate. Don't assume that she knows what you are thinking. Remember men and women are wired different.
2007-02-22 00:01:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i had the same problem with my man, we r not married yet but already become so close to each other that it feels like we've lived 30yrs together. I wanted to go back in time and i told him the same thing that im not happy and i want the chemistry back. i even said i wanna break up. i didnt mean it but i just wanted him to know how i fell. so good for him and me that he didnt take it personally and juts took action. surprises are always very nice. romantic cooked dinner, little presents: nice sexy underware not necessarily expensive, 2 necklaces with one heart that belongs to each other etc small stuff that really mean smth. go out to a movie, take an erotic dvd home and watch in in candles and dim lights. massage her and have her do it to u too so its not just ur effort. there is this really nice choco shop where they sell hear shape choco and inside u can put a message u could buy that, little stuff that r cute and mean a lot, because often a sexy pair nickers or a message on the pillow while she still is in bed sleeping has a greater effect than an expensive phone or jewllery. go walking in the park and just watch the sunset or the starts whatever that will make her feel imporatant and special to u
2007-02-25 02:31:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lord no. If she is unhappy for lack of attention........then give her some...and ask for some for yourself. Make a date to just sit in the bathroom and talk while she soaks in the tub...Trade massages after the kids are in bed. If you own your home........take a stroll around the exterior and exchange your ideas of what needs to be done to your home and how and when you would like to work on it. Walk around the block twice after dinner. Make sure you tell her how much you love her and why.....ask her to do the same for you. Keep in touch with her..........don't let her feel like she is all alone. Recognize when YOU feel all alone and go to her for comfort.....everyone needs to feel needed...it makes you remember why you are still there. If you are angry...work on ways to see it, admit it, and work through it till you can let it go (this is wickedly hard but lifechanging) . This is the point where you can SOLIDIFY your marriage instead of being passive and letting it sit as it is.....or even slowly disolve. Let her know that you are ready to take it to the next level. Don't give up. Don't let her give up. The two of you can make it work. Believe that and make it happen. :)
2007-02-22 00:18:52 · answer #4 · answered by yepitsme22 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when a wife constantly referring to when she and her husband first met, and how exciting and loving it was, she actually imply that there're something missing in the relationship at the moment. If you really love her, tt is your duty to find out what those things are and fulfill her needs.
Are you caring enough?
Are you being affectionate as before?
Are you taking your wife for granted?
Talk to her. Ask her to tell you openly the way she feels. Do not ignore her comments or implying something. It is hard being a good husband, but if you really want her to be happy, this is worth trying.
2007-02-22 00:04:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very tricky, nothing remains the same; relationships change and develop over time. Being hooked on the 'honeymoon' stage of falling in love can lead to constant disappointment and unfulfilled expectations. Maybe she needs to develop other areas of her life-exercise, training, new learning etc so that she doesn't expect you to 'make her feel good'.. In the end we are are happy together if we can also be happy alone.
2007-02-22 00:06:17 · answer #6 · answered by madresicilia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO, she obviously wants the excitement back! This means you should start taking her out again and acting like a loved up couple. Can you take her out to a place where your first date was? Or, ask her out and then when she is upstairs, go outside and knock on the front door, as if picking her up! Take her to a bar and pretend you just meet and start chatting her up, trust me, this all works! Buy her flowers, chocolates, roses. Set it in your mind that you are trying to win her heart all over again and good luck!! x
2007-02-22 00:50:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is not saying she wants to leave, she is saying she wants you to put a bit more effort in to her.
Write her a soppy letter or poem, try turning the tv off in the evening and playing cards (strip poker) or a board game togeather over a glass of wine, but u could also try reminding her that life ain't like the movies, we get tired from work and daily life & remind her that u love her.
Good luck
2007-02-22 00:02:51 · answer #8 · answered by K W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What she is trying to tell you is that she is wanting you to do things with her like you used to do when you were first together. So to me you need to start treating and loving her as you did when you were first together and dating. Date her once in a while . Buy her something just to surprise her. Do fun things with her at home. Cook her a nice dinner with candle light of her favorite foods. Romance her. Buy her some flowers just because. Write her a poem or a love note or letter. Women love things like this as long as they come from the heart.
2007-02-22 00:32:42 · answer #9 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
even if she turned back the clock she would still end up where she is now........marriage makes you content and so it should it means you know each other so well, when yous first met it was fun finding out things about each other plus the fact yous didn't live together so had fun and went places. so if she wants them feelings back again its not just you that has to throw in some surprises she also needs to remember the little things she did for you to rekindle that loving feeling
2007-02-22 00:04:59 · answer #10 · answered by angie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you can't let her go, starting all over again wont help you or her, because it get's to this stage of marriage anyways...just have to do things for each other and it's not only your responsibility to make her happy, it goes both ways...try to come up with something interesting and new:) good luck
2007-02-22 00:06:24 · answer #11 · answered by happydial 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋