ok, my wife and i were very happy together, we've been together since high school, but when i proposed to her, she cheat on me 4 days afterwards. i forgave her, i signed up for the military and we got married. we now have a 2 yr old daughter. i got orders that i was leaving for iraq, i told my wife and we talked and she said that i could still trust her, then in november my wife cheated on me again, with my supposedly friend,, the day i found out i told her it was over, she tried to commit suicide and i took her to the hospital. i reported it to my sargent, and he took it up to up to the colonel, and now they won't let me go, it seems that i missed a great oppurtunity becs. of my wifes stupidity. we are still together but it's hard, i don't know if i can do this, but i still love her so much, and i'm worried about my daughter, waht is this going to do to my daughter. everything is messin up. should i stay with her or leave, i want to stay, but i just don't know, plz help me.
2007-02-21 20:50:09 · 13 answers · asked by Wizard 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
One of the most important pilar in a relationship is TRUST and if this trust is lost as it is in your case then Divorce her...I don't know the age of the parties nor the State they were married and that plays a rolle...in your case your wife committed Adultery and that in some cases is Punished by Law!. If you are in the Armed Services if you committ Adultery you come under the UCMJ!!.
2007-02-21 21:05:31 · answer #1 · answered by Lubakraine 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry to tell you this but she will probably cheat on your again. If you want to be okay with this and let her do it then go ahead and stay with her, your daughter will grow up in either a dysfunctional family or with two parents that love her and can't be together. You couldn't go because of your wife? I guess if it happened right before you left then they might make you stay. Was your friend in the military because if he was, then he can get in trouble, and I am surprised that they haven't sent her back to your Home of record. Sometimes they do that, because a cheating spouse affects the ability for the soldier to be a effective soldiers. You need to go see a marriage counselor, and you need to go to JAG right away and see what options there are for you. Your military career is going to suffer if she keeps pulling this crap on you. I don't know how far you want to be in the system, but if you are not able to deploy because of your wife and home issues that is not looked upon highly by the military.
2007-02-21 21:06:16 · answer #2 · answered by Hawaiisweetie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once can be forgiven, but this is twice. How many times does it take before you say enough? She has emotional or psychological problems or both, take your daughter and leave, it's unhealthy for you and EXTREMELY unhealthy for your daughter. Whatever damage would be done by you leaving or your wife's suicide just doesn't compare to the damage your wife could do to her physically. If your wife would be so upset and distraught to take her own life, she would take your daughter's life too. Get yourself and your daughter out of danger! Try to get your wife some help, but you be sure your little girl is safe first
2007-02-21 21:11:41 · answer #3 · answered by Steel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your wife knew what she was doing and knew you were there to stop her when she was doing the suicide thing that was her way of getting out of her cheating so your mind would be on something else.So you would feel sorry for her do you really want someone who is running around on you like that. How can you even trust her isnt that supposed to be love. How many more times are you going to let her sleep with someone else before you get the picture you love her but she doesnt love you are she wouldnt be sleeping around on you.lol
2007-02-21 21:03:28 · answer #4 · answered by sweetpea 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she is not trust worthy do what you can to be a good father but explain to your wife your thoughts right befor you serv her pappers your daughter is still young and dosnt get whats truely going on and wont even realy remember any of this just do the best you can for her ...i have ben going through a very similer situation ..i came to find i needed to for 1ce pay attention to my own happiness,and that befor that is straight you cant realy do a lot for any1 else
2007-02-21 21:02:21 · answer #5 · answered by nrrs_chrstphr 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your wife certainly seems to have issues. Tell her that if she wants your continued support she must get theropy. If she won't do that then consider what's most important to you. You may need to quit your job, divorce your wife and ask for custody of your daughter. You should support your wife but only if she is prepared to help herself.
2007-02-21 21:14:32 · answer #6 · answered by gerrifriend 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think u should stay wid ur wife 4 da sake of your daughter but make it seem like u dont care about her anymore and the only reason u r with her iz cuz of the child. and im sure she will regret cheating cuz not caring about your wife is worst than a divorce and all thiz cheating iz a bad impact on your daughter your wife should know better
good luck
P.S u can always email me since im a woman and i can understand a women and tell u wat 2 do step by step im really good at it
2007-02-21 21:07:38 · answer #7 · answered by Dream_success 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your wife sounds like a silly child wanting attention all the time. How DARE she treat you like this? You need to get angry (Not physically) with her, have some respect for yourself, you sound like a thoroughly decent man, but unfortuneately, men like you get taken advantage of by women like her. Stand up for yourself, she has no right at all to behave like this, but she will carry on doing it as LONG AS YOU LET HER. It's time to say 'enough' She either makes as much effort as you to make the marriage work, or it's over, and that will be her fault, and her loss. Women like her make me ashamed to be a woman myself.
2007-02-21 21:01:15 · answer #8 · answered by myfavouritelucy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry dear, I hope you did not have to loose the job for your wife.
Try to let her talk to a physotherapist, she may need some help.
For whats its worth stay strong for your daughter.
2007-02-21 21:16:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Although it is not easy, try to forgive her since you still love her. Stay and time will prove it all.
2007-02-21 21:04:46 · answer #10 · answered by blurqu33n 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋