Truth: I've had five relationships. One was an 18 year marriage. Two were serious relationships with GFs (one lasted 4 years, the other 3 1/2 years). Two were "whirlwind romances" which easily could've developed into serious relationships.One lasted 6 months, the other 1 1/2 years. All failed due to dishonesty on the part of the ladies I was involved with. So are all women dishonest or have I cornered the market for getting involved with the wrong women? BTW, all 5 relationships were initiated by the women. All 5 women came from different backrounds, etc. What say ye?
2007-02-21 16:47:26 · 14 answers · asked by Silver Fox 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Quite honestly, I believe the answer to this troublesome routine belongs with you. You have pinpointed quite clearly, to me, anyway, where the problem is in your BTW. Here we need to break it down into a couple specific things.
It IS true that people will attrack a certain type of person to them in their looks and behavior and basically in the energy they put out. In this case, I am suggesting that you are drawing women towards you who are dishonest. Now, secondly, something about them must draw you to them since you are accepting the relationship. There is a reason, if you search for it in yourself. Something in you 'needs' this. It must fulfill a function for you or it would not continue. BTW - not all women are dishonest!
There is a solution to this problem of yours and it can go a couple different ways. You can pay very close attention to the women who are attracted to you and try to identify what it is about them that 'hooks' you. (Relationships are something like velcro - where each person has a corresponding emotional 'hook'. If the hooks don't match up, there's no connection.) If you can find that internal issue that needs to be addressed and fix it, you're good to go. You'll no longer attrack that type of person.
The other solution is this - YOU find the girl that YOU want to be with! You initiate the relationship. I suspect that perhaps you aren't sure what you are looking for and find that it is easier to let 'them come to you', so to speak. The thing is, you need to change the pattern to change the outcome. Break the cycle. (Just don't go looking for dames with your hook, lol) Take a look around, take some chances, ask yourself what you want and see what happens. Pay close attention especially to what is 'somehow different' about these relationships than with the ones you have had before. That's a key piece in understanding.
So, are you READY for things to be different? If you are, find your hook, file off the tip, scope your mind and the world for what YOU want, and make your own moves. I think you will find that the change is what you are looking for.
Take care of you. Good luck!
2007-02-21 17:23:06 · answer #1 · answered by Pantera 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boy... matters of the heart are so fickled at times, yet can bring us such glorious joy.
The breaking of trust is probably the largest factor in broken relationships now days. It is partly due to lack of communication and a fast life. It also encompasses our insecurities.
So, what is one to do? People will fail you. Choose wisely and carefully with mind and soul. It is a risk that is worth the time, as there is proof that some couples make it.
Don't stop trying... not all women are jerks, just like not all men are jerks either.
Happy Trails
2007-02-22 00:54:10 · answer #2 · answered by Golden Smile 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should never give up looking for that one true love.
Sometimes I think that it's a matter of that we try to hard. Take things one day at a time, and not worry so hard about looking. Then at times things seem to fall in our laps.
I had been divorced for about 16 years when a long time friend and I decided that we wanted to try and become more than friends. We aren't married yet but it's in the works.
But before that, I used to feel sorry for myself when I'd see a couple holding hands or something and say to myself "Why can't that be me?'
I never thought that that would ever be me again. And things have changed.
Also, keep the faith, God can help and do wonders for us.
2007-02-22 00:59:15 · answer #3 · answered by ktsgrl2 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never stop looking for true love. It sounds like to me that you haven't found it yet, although at the time maybe you thought that you did. Keep looking, never give up on it. Someone is out there that will make you the person that you are meant to be and will be your better half for eternity.
NEVER SETTLE, and that applies to all areas of your life. Not all women are as difficult as the ones you've been with, although it seems like it at times. You must always stay positive because you could meet her tomorrow, be ready for it. I'm still looking and waiting excitedly for the same thing.
2007-02-22 00:54:05 · answer #4 · answered by Dr. of Situational Psychology 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like my husbands past experiences with women. He actually decided to give up and didn't date anyone in over a year and then when he and I least expected it(I wasn't looking for anything serious at the time) we met and got married 10 months later. We've been married for over 5 yrs. now. Don't give up. There's someone perfect for you out there somewhere.
2007-02-22 00:52:25 · answer #5 · answered by sweet.pjs1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe none of these women are ment to be. Are you sure you had no part in these breakups??? Find someone that you are compatable, yeah easier said than done. All I can say is good luck!!! When it is time you will meet the right person.
2007-02-22 00:52:10 · answer #6 · answered by pink 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Umm... you're just unlucky mate.... I've had .... eh... alot more relationships, and alot of them have been great, and broken up due to either one's fault, just outside circumstances... i.e. moving away, mutual decision,... don't look though, just let things happen. like with the other 5, how the lady initiated, soon enough you'll find a good one, trial and error my friend
2007-02-22 00:51:49 · answer #7 · answered by Wsdm 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ALL women aren't alike any more than all men. Don't look for Love. Just live a good active life. If it happens, it happens. If it doesn't, would you be any worse off than the roller coaster ride you've been on so far?
2007-02-22 01:28:13 · answer #8 · answered by DixeVil 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not everyone is dishonest. You need to find something you love to do (a hobby) and find someone who likes the same thing. Take it real slow and tell them how you feel about being honest.
2007-02-22 00:53:29 · answer #9 · answered by C M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats all up to you. It depends whether on whether or not you hae the ability to erase all the negative thoughts from your head and continue on your path to find that one person. It all depends on what you want and how you feel. And you never know, maybe if you stop looking.. that one person will find you and then sparks could fly and who knows.. life's funny like that
2007-02-22 00:50:57 · answer #10 · answered by frontlinenut13 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋