I am dating this guy, and he is somewhat of a loner. He literally has no friends. Most of the time he is calm and it is almost impossible to get a rise out of him. But when I tried to introduce him to my friends, he got into a fight. The guy he got into a fight with was poking him and after my boyfriend asked him multiple times to stop, my boyfriend turned around and popped him in the face. The other 3 guys were trying to hold him back from the guy he just hit. My boyfriend took them all on and won. I want to stay with him because he has a masters degree in engineering and is a genius, but after seeing what a monster he can turn into im having second thoughts. Any thoughts from you yahoo people??? Also, why might he be the way he is???
2007-02-21 11:55:59 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
hmmmm, ok, so he was being poked and violated and harrassed by one of your friends and he asked your friend to stop MULTIPLE times and finally got annoyed because him being polite and asking him politely MULTIPLE times he was finally forced to resort to extreme measures to DEFEND himself and you are caling your boyfriend a monster
perhaps your friend is a prick and deserved getting a beat down, i know i would have done the same after telling your friend to stop MULTIPLE times
i noticed that you didn't mention on here if your boyfriend was good to you or if he treated you good or if he was a nice guy or not, all you did mention was that he has a masters degree in engineering, i can pretty much see the $$ light up in your eyes
the way i see it, your friends instigated the whole scenario, and you and your friends deserve each other because you don't have any depth to yourself either, leave the poor guy so he can find someone to be happy with instead of being stuck with you
2007-02-21 12:35:04 · answer #1 · answered by zether 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think there is probably more to know about your boyfriend that he doesn't want to share that with you. It could be that he may be a jealous guy, had some childhood trauma, or just doesn't know how to act with being around people in general.
You may want have a chat with him some time to find out what is bothering him, or it could be just nothing. The guy that he had a fight with must have intimidated him to where your boyfriend didn't know how to control himself, so he got into that fight.
If you consider him being a violent man, has he ever gotten violent with you by hitting you or other people besides your other friends?
I think if he is a violent man, don't stay with him just because he has a masters degree in engineering and is a genius, you will be staying with him for the wrong reasons.
Plus, just because he got into a fight doesn't necessarily mean that he is a violent man, it could be that he just doesn't know how to control the situation. Being angry is a natural thing, but being a violent extremist who just likes to hit or hurt people, is something different.
2007-02-21 12:08:38 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Actually, I don't understand what the problem is. Me, I would probably have done more than just popped him in the face. By your own admission, the other guy was asked multiple times to stop. Your boyfriend reacted. Why does this make him violent? It makes the other one an *** for continuing to do something he was told was annoying. Why is your boyfriend a monster. He took on four people and won. You should be applauding him, not giving him a hard time. He should be ashamed of you for not supporting him.
2007-02-21 12:08:24 · answer #3 · answered by eharrah1 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I won't justify his behavior, but it sounds like he was being harassed a bit by the other guy and went off the deep end. It also would seem he has some social disorder that makes him not want to be around people. Whether or not you stay or go is entirely up to you. If he has never been violent or abusive towards you, then I don't think he would be. He just seems to do better in a one on one situation. The main problem I see is it will cut you off eventually from your friends too. So you need to decide if you can live your life with basically just him in it. If not, move on.
2007-02-21 12:03:08 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, if you're only dating him or staying with him because of his earning potential, that's pretty shallow on your part. But as far as the situation goes, I can't say I wouldn't have reacted in the same manner. He was being physically provoked and annoyed and the guy would still not stop bothering him, so he jaw-jacked him. From how you write it, it's got nothing to do with how he is, just a reaction (albeit perhaps a bad one) to unpleasant provocation.
2007-02-21 12:09:35 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If i told someone to stop poking me and they didn't i would get pis*ed as well... Then once he hit the guy his blood was pumping and the other people there were not his friends so he felt threatened.. Talk to him about it tell him it scared you and see what he says..I would not take it so serious personally.. If he has not shown any other signs of violence then give him a chance
2007-02-21 12:04:51 · answer #6 · answered by BLONDE BEAUTY 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If I were in your shoes, I will be worrying about my future just in case we have disagreements or small fights.
I don't want to think that he will become an abusive husband in the future but based on what had happened to your friends., there's a possiblity he can be one, since he was impatient and violent and unable to control his anger.
It will be wise of you to weigh things carefully before making final decisions, don't you think so?
2007-02-21 16:02:29 · answer #7 · answered by dtmc542006 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe he is insecure and seems to have anger problems. That would scare me!!!! I think you should really look at it, does he ever get violent with you. Or even verbally mean. If so, GET OUT!!!! Be careful!!!!! Talk to a close friend about it also.
2007-02-21 12:00:43 · answer #8 · answered by pink 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You should leave him. He may end up hitting you or hurting you if you get into a fight. And you will get in a fight. When a person is angry like that, gender is no issue. It's better to be safe than sorry.
2007-02-21 12:03:54 · answer #9 · answered by sunflowerdaisy94 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
oh goodness, look at it this way, if it were your sister or best friend telling you the exact same thing that you typed above, what would you tell them? Exactly, cool it, .......he needs some anger management classes, perhaps even counseling, but to be sure he is a time bomb just ticking away.
2007-02-21 12:02:46 · answer #10 · answered by abc 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋