I have been friends with this person for a while, and oddly i still feel like i don't know them that well. In general, he very cold and distant and don't offer much details about himself. He is very hard to read as far as facial expression and tone of voice goes. He is kind of impassive and monotone...but he still seems to function in society as a new college grad. he goes out on the weekend drinking, and he has a really good finance job. I sometimes think that maybe he just dislikes me, but everytime i talk to him he is responsive and chats with me for a while (he doesn't blow me off or say he's too busy) I tell him a lot about myself, but I really would love to know about HIM. Sometimes when i talk to him, i feel like i am a nuisance only because i always initiate contact with him and i begin to doubt myself. I dont know where i stand with him, if i am a nuisance to him, or if he likes talking to me. I want to get him to open up. Does he like me or no? should i just give up?
2007-02-21 11:43:57 · 3 answers · asked by Tammy L 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Once i got frustrated with him and said that he is only an acquaintance, and i said it because i feel like i hardly know him. I think he was offended by that comment, even though i did not mean it to hurt him. It was probably illadvised but i really feellike he is more like an acquaintance rather than a friend because he is so distant and doesn't provide much information. Is he afraid of intimacy? How do i go about getting him to warm to me? I know there is a great person beneath the surface, i just can't seem to reach it.
2007-02-21 11:47:21 · update #1
I'm putting your two questions beside each other and noticing that you are asking the world about two friends, one of each gender, whom you experience as struggling with personal communication. One who seems to offend your feelings without realizing it and one who seems to you shut down and not liking to express his own inner being. So you might be brave enough to consider if there is anything about y o u in this dynamic.
How are you, for example, when you do meet and mix with people who ARE open about themselves and sensitive to feelings? Some people... yes, including some women... feel insecure and threatened then, they actually feel safer in the company of 'closed' people... you know, less vulnerable, less likely to be 'invaded'. I'm not suggesting that's you - I'm simply offering you the idea of discovering more of who you are.
2007-02-22 23:25:07 · answer #1 · answered by MBK 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Obviously he likes you or he wouldn't talk to you, I'd dress very sexy, put my arms around him and give him a big smooch all of a sudden to see how and if he would react, you got nothing to lose.
2007-02-21 22:17:42 · answer #2 · answered by Georgewasmyfavorite 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Totally a psychology unrelated answer, but he sounds like a Scorpio or Capricorn man. Is he? He probabaly won't tell you that either huh. Lol.
2007-02-21 20:04:45 · answer #3 · answered by Rain 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋