It's been three month since I gave birth to my cute little boy, and somehow I feel like Im not in the mood for sex most of the time. Before I used to live for it, the slightest touch would get me going. Let me rephrase that, I am always in the mood. Now I feel unexcited, maybe with the routine we do, plus my contraceptive pills really affected my spontaneity.Won't you agree that after some time, no matter how you love each other, it slips once in a while? Has anyone here experienced the same thing? What can I do to bring back that loving feeling?
2007-02-21 10:01:23 · 15 answers · asked by SexyBelle 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I dont know.. I have a 22 month old and it has just gotten worse, especially since i began working full time too.. i'd rather sleep!
2007-02-21 10:05:54 · answer #1 · answered by zimba 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know how birth control pill affect your spontaneity....You only take them once a day??? Try taking them when u brush your teeth or something.
Anyway...it's your mindset that you need to change. If you are having trouble finding time, make it a point to set aside time per day to spend alone with your husband....like when the baby is napping or send him to grandma's or at worse hire a baby sitter for a couple hours. If you are into sexy lingerie buy some and suprise your hubby when he comes home....If he wants to do it and you aren't in the mood....just do it. By the time it get's started you maybe enjoying it....plus the time you spend arguing about not doing you could have just done it and then been on to other things. Having date nite once a week to get out of the house is also a good thing.
Good luck
2007-02-21 10:15:45 · answer #2 · answered by answergirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its normal for a couple not have sex for ahile after the birth of their child. Your body has gone through so much and now the both of you have a little to boy to care for, which is your priority. I know some couple who never had sex for 12 months or more after the birth of child so what you are going through is normal. If you are concerned that medically there is a problem given the contraceptive pills I suggest that you seek medical advice. Good luck!
2007-02-21 10:10:10 · answer #3 · answered by jtgot1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm in exactly the same boat - I have a 12 week old baby and I've gone off sex completely.
I think its quite natural and perhaps we should stop beating ourselves up about it. Our libidos will come back when they are good and ready. Having a baby is such a big event its only natural it alters our feelings for a while. I'm just glad to hear that someone else feels this way because I thought I was the only one!
2007-02-21 10:11:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It happens to most women right after birth. Your hormone levels are probably off. Are you breast feeding? Talk to your doctor about it. Sex is mostly in the head anyway, so if you aren't feeling in the mood it is probably subconscious...you don't want to get pregnant again! You can go to a health food store and ask them to show you their libido formulas, which are usually all natural and herbal. Emerita makes a great one! Try watching some porn with your husband, ask for a massage, go a little slower and ask for alot more foreplay. You'll get in the mood!
2007-02-21 10:09:00 · answer #5 · answered by StrawberryShortcake 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been through something similar. I am a man, but was involved in the same situation. My wife had my daughter then was no longer sexually active. I waited around for almost a year, finally I gave up. Needless to say I am now Devorced and engaged to another woman that I know this will not happen too, because she has had a baby of her own. I suggest trying new things. To most women having a baby is the ultimate goal and once they have actually had one then there is no point in sex anymore. I would definately make some more goals.
2007-02-21 10:07:06 · answer #6 · answered by nshappe 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
there are chemical imbalances right now going on inside you, besides you are wore out i bet most of the time, be honest with hubby tell him what is going on and you are sorry for it that will make him feel good for you allowing him to be in a solution ,plus if it is bothering you it will make him glad you trusted him with it ,he is your man remember that is one reason you married him right? so let him in on it you will Be surprised ,also ther e are women who their inner self is scared cause they know what happened last time you had sex, and the pills do have an effect , you might want to talk with obgyn, ithink that's what they call them the woman doctor you know i am a guy my wife listened to my grandmother no pain pills El natural by sharing with him will bring you two closer than you can imagine that's what you want anyway, it will come take it easy but let him know whats up ,
2007-02-21 10:52:25 · answer #7 · answered by JAYHAWKER 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, SexyBelle, sorry i couldn't resist. You are experiencing a temporary problem. If you used to be easily aroused you wlll be again. If he is impatient, just tell him good things are worth waiting for. Don't worry about what's happening to you, that would only complicate things for you....if you want it, then get rid of the contraceptives and try something different for birth control. That way your spontaneity may return quicker.
2007-02-21 10:12:46 · answer #8 · answered by normansbro 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take your time that feeling will come back. Many women expierence a lack of interest in sex right after having a baby, they are still recouperating, still healing, child birth is a very difficult thing and your homones are still "out of balance" Give it time, I do suggest you discuss this with your physician, he/she can give you some insightful information on what you are going through
2007-02-21 10:24:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Exercise after the baby and getting into good shape helps get that back big time. Working out together with your husband makes a difference too. It will get better. Good luck.
2007-02-21 10:09:20 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋