Are women OK about their boyfriend having female friends?

Question

I'm single at the moment, but think that my last girlfriend was unhappy that one of my close friends is female. When I do meet someone, how do I make sure it's not a problem.

What if I mentioned that my best female friend is in fact an ex of mine. Is that allowed?

Answer 1

tell her straight your best mate is a girl if she thinks anything of you she will accept it, i have lots of male friends and my hubby lots of female ones dont mean to say we are sh**ing them. xx

Answer 2

Hi, (I'm female)

If your girlfriend isn't happy that your best friend is a girl then she doesn't trust you and to be honest in a relationship you need to be able to trust each other for it to work out. When you go with another girl maybe try and get it into a conversation that your best friend is a girl. I do see where your ex is coming from she was maybe scared in case she lost you but if this girl is a true friend don't loose her over some jealous girl. A true friend will always be there for you but girlfriends can come and go.

Answer 3

You are well past wrong here hun. I mean what kind of person just says you can't know anyone of the opposite sex that is single. Be it friend or otherwise. I mean reread what you just said there. Your guy has known these chicks alot longer than he has known you. And rather they dated in the past or not. They are still his friends. Its not like they are all over him and saying "oh yes, lets get it on right here and right now on the badmitton courts". No that is not how friendship works. I mean I'm sure you have single male friends that you are friends with and probably still are friends with before you got together with your guy. So don't be so rude and bossy trying to control your man's life like that. I mean the man is not sleeping with his friends, he is with you. So grow up and stop trying to control him. Because if you keep this up he will find someone that isn't uncomfortable with his friends.

Answer 4

You must be straight up honest with anyone that you get involved with because some people are very weiry when you bring another female into the picture. Due to you are taking away from your couple time and giving to another female..it is odd but it is how some chics think..not all but some..I would also suggest to do some couple dates with your best friend and girl friend to let your girl friend see that she is involved with someone. Do not get to close..this is something that could be misinterpted. Good luck the next time!

Answer 5

I'm sure the majority of people would be cool with it. Why did she have a problem with just one of your female friends thou? Maybe she picked up on some vibes, how was ur pal acting towards her? My ex had a good female pal who was hot! She used to fancy him, it sucked until I realised he was with me through his choice, most girls/guys are pretty laid back about partner's buddies of the opposite sex but obviously you might find one or 2 who have issues with your closeness! Sorry not much help but you cant make it not a problem - only your next partner can do that!

Answer 6

It all depends on the women in the situation! If your girl is not secure with her position in the relationship she would feel threaten by every other woman in your life no matter what! However any sensible woman would be suspicious if the "friend" was acting like more than a friend! For example, if that friend is doing things like bringing your man lunch everyday or clean his house weekly or run errands all that is a little much!

Answer 7

ask yourself how you'd feel if your girlfriends ex was still a close friend... not many men would be happy with that... none of you would want to admit that but its true.that ex can know things about you intimate things that friends dont know. maybe your ex and your girlfriend could swap notes... after all if you're such good friends what made you split up? sounds like you want your cake and eat it too.men and women can be friends but exes are always going to be an issue when they remain friends....jealousy can rear its ugly head when you least expect it.maybe you appeared closer to your ex than your girlfriend would have liked.

Answer 8

..that girlfriend was probably scared because her boyfriend could possibly cheating on her, She is scared you will break her heart for her, or she just feels like the third wheel,or she feels intimidated..well when or if you meet a girl make sure she knows she wont be left out you wont fall for your best friend and make sure she is ok with like you know make sure she knows you 2 are best friends and will always stay that way.

Answer 9

I have been in the position of both the "close female friend" and the girlfriend many times, so I know how this goes from both sides.

Horror stories:

I remember going to a pub to meet a boyfriend's friends for the first time. The instant we got in, this girl let out this massive squeal and launched herself at him, gaving him a big hug and a kiss and then dragging him away to meet someone, leaving me standing in the middle of the pub on my own not knowing which ones were his friends. I don't know who was ruder there, her or him.

I remember a good friend of mine getting a new girlfriend. I could tell the first time I saw her that she had already made up her mind not to like me. She made about three bitchy comments within the first ten minutes, and was cool towards me the whole afternoon. For my part, I decided that I didn't like her either thank you very much, and I declined all future invitations, seeing him only when she was out of town (i.e. rarely).

It's lucky for me he split up with her six months later. In a different world he could have gone on to marry her and I'd have lost him as a friend for good just because I was too proud to keep making the effort to at least get on with her. I mean, rightly or wrongly she would have been quite entitled not to invite me to the wedding, never mind involve me in any of their future married life.

I've learned a lot over the years, most of it the hard way! So, credentials over, onto the advice.

Introduce the two of them as soon as possible. That way, the girlfriend knows from the start what the situation is and if it's a dealbreaker for her then she can say so up front long before you've fallen for her. Fact is, it's she who is the new person in this existing situation and she can take it as it is or she can walk away. There's no "third option" of you ditching your friend.

This also stops the girlfriend from feeling threatened by constant tales of this great, brilliant MYSTERY girl who means so much to you. I don't have a problem with my boyfriends having female friends, but I would like them to be more than just a name to me. I'd like them to be my friends too.

Your friend needs to appreciate that possible insecurity (I'm sure she does) and cut the new girlfriend some slack. Two elements to this: 1. The first meeting is not the time for your friend to give you a big hug and a kiss and walk arm in arm with you, even if that is what she usually does. 2. Even if they wouldn't necessarily be friends under other circumstances, you should not let it get to the situation where you only see your friend when your girlfriend isn't there.

Don't let your friend make a snap judgment about the girlfriend, or vice versa, and decide that one meeting is enough. It will come back to haunt you in the long run. Be prepared to appeal to the better natures of both of them (separately) by telling them how much it means to you that they both get along.

Sometimes the friend is a little jealous that your time is being taken away by another girl - even if she isn't romantically interested in you it's still competition in a sense.

Try to keep watch for little power-games and be sensitive in the way you handle them - you may need to nip it in the bud by making a point of "snubbing" your friend for your girlfriend (e.g. if there's a spare seat next to both of them, sit with the girlfriend) to make sure she gets the message that if she puts you in a position of having to choose then she may not like the choice you make. Your girlfriend, having arrived on the scene when the friendship already existed and chosen to go out with you regardless, hopefully shouldn't have quite so much of an issue.

Displays of possession from your friend (like whispering in your ear or leading you off for a private chat leaving the girlfriend on her own) are inappropriate, and displays of casual affection (sitting really close and so on) are only acceptable if she's prepared to do the same or similar to your girlfriend.

Think twice before venting to your friend when you've had a row with your girlfriend because, like families, she may bear a grudge on your behalf long after you've kissed and made up.

So yeah, in summary, the girlfriend shouldn't make you choose between her and your friend, your friend should make a real effort even if it's rocky at first, and you should be sure to see both sides.

Answer 10

Some girls get pretty jealous and want their boyfriend all for themselves while others are pretty understanding about them having female friends. As a married woman, I trust my husband and I'm OK with him having female friends as I too have male friends. It all boils down to trust. Just make sure you make her feel that she is your one and only.

Answer 11

if you have a female friend try introducing them to your girlfriends, so they don't feel that they are a fret. and you really have to answer the question is your ex girlfriend friendship worth being single.