Please this is for the women. I have a young daughter and I am a single father. She is 12 years old and I have a dilema. She started her menstrual cycle this weekend. She actually started crying because she thought she was dying. Well I gave her a bunch of toilet paper to use. was that ok I ran to the store to buy pads and tampons. i gave her the pads but i am afraid to give her the tampons. Of course she is a virgen will the tampons break her hymen and will it hurt. How far do I tell her to put them in. Should I take her to the doctor. Isnt 12 too young to go thru this. Please any women help me as you can see I am in a dilema. She stayed home from school on Monday and tuesday she went back today when she felt safe. Thanking you all kindly
2007-02-21 05:54:31 · 21 answers · asked by larryissfc 3 in Health ➔ Women's Health
My thoughts are with you. 12 is a very normal (almost perfectly average) age for a girl to start her menstrual periods. The toilet paper was a great idea. All of us women have had to do that at least once.
Education will help both of you through this. Entering womanhood is a trying experience for both of you. Tampons are completely acceptable in a virgin who is menstruating. Some women have no discomfort, and breaking the hymen does not mean that she has lost her virginity, per se. Many girls have a partial hymen or have broken theirs during sports, etc. However, most girls prefer not to use tampons early on. Leave this choice to her.
As far as education goes, you need to learn as well. You can call your (or her) doctor or nurse to get the facts about menstruation and puberty. I encourage you to have her talk to a close female family member to get the "secrets" of womanhood, including how to use feminine products. It will be ackward if you try to explain that.
This is a normal part of growing up. You are not going to "break" her. Just be honest and caring. If you don't know the answer, just tell her that you don't know. Best of luck.
2007-02-21 06:00:25 · answer #1 · answered by SA16 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
12 is actually a very average age for a girl to start menstruating. It can happen as young as 8 or 9, or when she is 16 or 17, there is a big range.
If you would like to buy tampons, I would suggest starting with the smallest size. Some brands sell "juniors". Inside of each tampon box comes a booklet with instructions on how to insert one, as well as information on Toxic Shock Syndrome. The best way to avoid TSS is to change the tampon around every 4 hours. I personally would wait a few months before giving her tampons.
Other things which may be helpful to keep in the house include Midol, or a heating pad (warmth to the abdomen does wonders for cramping).
2007-02-21 07:44:09 · answer #2 · answered by Laura H 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
12 is very normal for a girl to start her period. I do feel for you and for your daughter. Mine is so scared that she is going to start hers while she is with her dad and he won't do anything so from experience you did the right thing. Next step I would suggest is get her to talk to someone she feels comfortable talking to explain everything and if that means you then you will have to find the information. As far as the tampons compared to the pads the pads are just fine unless she is going swimming and then she would either have to wait till she is done with her period or use a tampon. That is the only time that there is a definite and it does not hurt a virgin if it is put in correctly......Best of luck
2007-02-22 20:16:31 · answer #3 · answered by angelwings091502 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a single father, I seriously urge to you educate yourself on the puberty and growth structure, as well as female anatomy. 12 year olds are reaching puberty and their menstrual cycles frequently. There is nothing wrong with her using a tampon though it may hurt her at first but providing her with both options was wise. It gives her the chance to choose. The instructions are on the box or on the pamphlet inside. You can read them for her or have her read them and do the insertion. If she is uncomfortable having you help her, then taking her to an OBGYN will not hurt, unless there is a female role model she may feel comfortable with.
The bottom line, with your education of this lifestyle change, you can explain to her what's happening. It's no reason to stay home from school. ALL young girls will go through this.
2007-02-21 06:04:12 · answer #4 · answered by S H 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hello!
12 is the normal age,i started mine at 13 though.Yes,the toilet paper was fine,that's what i had to use my first time.Pad's have always been my choice,so much easier than tampons just get a fresh one when the other one is use gets stinky or to full.Yes the tampon will break her hymen,it might hurt.12 is not to young,my cousin started hers at age 10!.Try talking to a female family relative or someone thats a female you know.
Here's some advice from me to you,
1.they make these pads by 'Always' and they have little wipes attached to the pad,that way she could stay clean.
2.Try buying your daughter a book about purberty or the period.This really helped me reading books about it.
3.Unless she likes tampons,try sticking to pads for now,and save tampons for later.like i said pads are easier in my opinion.
goodluck!
2007-02-21 06:08:14 · answer #5 · answered by BabyGirl Emily. 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you would both feel more comfortable if she discussed this with a female. Have her choose someone who she would feel comfortable discussing this with. Possibly a friend's mother, since her friends are all going through the same things and the mother has some experience with this.
Purchase pads and small tampons (they have slim size and teen size) for her and keep them at your house. Let her use whichever she is most comfortable with. Remind her to read the directions carefully if she opts to use the tampons. Also tell her that you will be happy to get her whatever kind she wants and she should feel free to just ask you or write it on your grocery list.
2007-02-21 06:02:14 · answer #6 · answered by ♥Lucky♥ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I just want to make something clear...she is NOT too young for tampons!! Just leave the tampons for her, if she wants to use them she will. I used them right from the beginning...I always thought, and still think, pads are gross. You are a dad doing the best you can...just remember that she probably learned all about her period and what to use from school and especially her friends. She'll be fine...this is life!!
2007-02-21 06:29:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
12 is not too young to menustrate. Dont make her use the tampons, there is no reason for that. Pads are fine. You need to have someone explain all this to her, preferably a woman, like a nurse or a friend.
2007-02-21 05:59:58 · answer #8 · answered by chiara 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you have any close female freinds to talk to her and get her some books . Let her read them . Omg she was so embarassed I bet . Take her to the dr on the tampon issue okay cause I dont have any daughters all I have are sons . I think you do need to get her some books though and let her read them and then have a female friend on standby in case she has any ? s . good luck daddy . I know this must be hard on you . No 12 is about the right age . good luck to you .
2007-02-21 06:03:51 · answer #9 · answered by Kate T. 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It may be a little scary for her,and for yourself but it is perfectly normal. 12 is normally when girls will get their first menstrual cycle. I think you should just give her pads right now since she just started and then as she gets older let her decide if she wants to use pads or tampons. Again dont freak out to much its totally normal :)
2007-02-21 06:00:00 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋