My husband's car is in the shop so he's been driving mine. We work opposite shifts some days and on those days I usually get a ride home with my father who lives a few miles away from us. This evening my father will be out of town and unable to give me a ride home. I tried my grandmother and she's in the hospital with my sick uncle and my mom's on a business trip so neither of them are availible either. My best friend lives an hour and a half from me so she isn't an option. I have no other family around this area and there aren't any bus routes that go out to where I live. I called a male friend whom I dated eight years ago to ask for a ride home and he agreed. We've been nothing but friends for eight years and we only dated a few months way back when. The problem is this, if my husband finds out that James gave me a ride home he may react badly and I don't want him to feel at all threatened by James. Any tips on how to handle this?
2007-02-21 05:17:09 · 17 answers · asked by Kitten 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I can't take a taxi because we're in between paychecks and his broken car cost us a LOT to get towed.
2007-02-21 05:28:38 · update #1
I would just tell him a friend gave you a ride home and leave it at that. You aren't really lying to him and you save pain, anger and heartache. Only tell him who it was if he asks.
2007-02-21 05:26:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Lying to your spouse is never a good idea. It will cause for mistrust in the future and if there is nothing for your husband to worry about as you say then you should be able to just tell him. Try to think of other options if your husband is the jealous type. Ask a co-worker to give you a ride. Everyone needs help from time to time... Good luck!
2007-02-21 05:23:50 · answer #2 · answered by enigma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The needing a ride issue is something that should have been discussed "prior" to you needing a ride from another guy/gal or whatever. Fibbing is lying no matter what you call it and if you worry that hubby will be upset, then that should be a good indication that it's not right.
If he loves you, he should understand that getting a ride from another guy is JUST that and that you did NOT have a choice in the matter.
Tell him that!!!!!
2007-02-21 05:25:06 · answer #3 · answered by mom tree 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should never lie or withold facts from your spouse. I think if you are planning a surprise for them or something a little white lie is okay.
As far as the ex giving you a ride home. I would tell your husband, because if he found out that you didn't tell him he will probably think something was going on for you not to tell him. Be honest in a marriage that's where the trust comes from.
2007-02-21 05:23:12 · answer #4 · answered by clints_wench 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well next time you should not ask another male to give you a ride... in the meantime, you should tell him the truth, nicely and calmly...possibly, DONT mention that you called him, instead say that as you were looking for people to call, he happend to call you, asked what you and your husband where up to and see how life is going, and then you told him you needed a ride, he offered, he came and left and that was that...
but honeslty, for the sake and health of your relationship with your husband, i wouldnt let this happen ever again. put yourself in your husband's situation...would you like it if HIS ex gf gave him a ride? iiiiiii ddddooonnttttt thinkkkkkkkkkkk soooo
2007-02-21 05:22:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi ok.B, i actually smiled when I study your question because of the fact I basically had an relatively severe argument with my spouse the day gone by and it became into related to something comparable. I despatched her an e mail and asked her if she has ever lied to me? This became into her respond: " i won't be in a position to bear in mind because of the fact this is been some years yet I attempt to no longer lie and if i do its for the acceptable suited reasons or for the sake of peace. there became into this one time I had a weigh down on a guy and that became right into a skill to come back at you" nicely i understood her however the actuality that she had a weigh down on an relatively good buddy of mine became into worrying. To around this up, mendacity on your significant different is okay if it going to make the dating greater advantageous yet in no way enable the different individual detect it became right into a lie you informed because of the fact he/she wont understand explanation why you mandatory to have performed that. So ok.B wish i became into in a position to respond to your question properly?
2016-10-02 12:20:04 · answer #6 · answered by poehlein 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why don't you ask a co-worker for a ride home? do not lie to your husband, ask him is it okay for James to give you a ride home. do not put your husband in that position for him to react badly. if you don't want him to think something is going on then do not hide things of that nature from him
2007-02-21 05:26:24 · answer #7 · answered by janiebug 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your husband you need a ride on those days, if he can't , your male friend will give you a ride.
It is never okay to lie to your spouse about anything.
2007-02-21 05:28:36 · answer #8 · answered by nwnativeprincess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The breakdown of trust isn''t an immediate thing...it's like a rain breaking down a hill over time....
This lie (let's call it what it is) is that first step down the "dark side"....WHat if your husband finds out....many men (myself included) would think if she'll lie to me about a small thing then she'll lie about a big thing....if you have to take a taxi...do whatever you have to inorder to preserve your trust with your husband...surely their is somone or someway you can get out of this situation...you're smart...you'll figure it out...
GOod luck
2007-02-21 05:24:27 · answer #9 · answered by hoyhoydc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hate to say it, but some things are better left unsaid. Why would you want to tell him something that you know is going to hurt or upset him? Just keep it to yourself and it was only a 1 time thing, so there's no harm especially if nothing happened romantically.
2007-02-21 05:21:41 · answer #10 · answered by sweet libra 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋