I have a 1 month old daughter who was born 6 weeks early; how do I keep smoke away from her?

Question

Everyone in my family, except my parents, and her dad's whole family smokes. It's so hard to bring her over to anyone's house to visit because she cannot handle the smoke in her lungs. If we don't bring her over to visit then it seems like I'm the bad person for keeping her from them. We've brought her over to his sisters and parents and even after telling them that she cannot be by cigarrette smoke, they just go about 10 feet away and light up a ciggarrtte anyways...it's like hello...smoke will travel especially over an open floor plan. They don't want to listen and I don't want her to end up in the hospital again after being in there 2 weeks. PLease.....what would you do?

When we were over at his sisters, they opened a window, but Lacie was still only 5 feet away because it was the first time they saw her.

Answer 1

There is one simple solution...........

If they insist on smoking then you keep your baby away.......They have no regard for the baby if smoking is more important!!!!

Second hand smoke is bad for babies and worse worse for a baby who started her little life 6weeks early!

I hate smoking and I would extend them and open invitation to come to my house anytime they wanted to see the baby but I would tell them under no circumstances will you go to their house and subject your daughter to their smoking!!!
**no smoking in my house*
Stay strong on that, your baby is more important than what anyone else thinks!!!!

I don't even know them and they make me sick for actually smoking 10ft away after you have asked them not tooooo!!!

Answer 2

I know this probably isn't what you want to hear, but if it were my baby, I wouldn't go over to anyone's house if I knew they were going to be smoking. I wouldn't take my healthy children to a smoker's house. It isn't healthy for any child to breathe smoke, and if other people can't respect that, then don't go to their house. You really can't expect smokers not to smoke in their own home, anyway. You CAN, however, expect anyone you like NOT to smoke in YOUR home. So invite them over and make sure they know that your house is SMOKE-FREE. Put an ash tray on the back porch (or wherever outside) and tell them that if they'd like to smoke, they're free to use your smoker's lounge. Or, meet them somewhere public where there is no smoking allowed (this is easier in some states than others, but you might have somewhere around you that will work). It sounds like you already know this, but your child's health is so much more important! You don't have to cut off all contact, but think of it this way: even if you go to a smoker's house and they don't smoke, that house is full of smoke already, even if they don't light up while you are there. They could have just finished one before you walked in the door. It's in the air, it's in the fabric, on the walls, in the carpet... just stay out of it altogether.

Good luck!

Answer 3

Your daughter's health needs to be the priority and you are NOT a bad person if you consider her before the rest of your family. It's too bad that their habit has made them so inconsiderate as to risk her tiny lungs. You just need to be firm in saying that you cannot allow her to be around the smoke. If they want to visit they will have to come to your smoke free home. Hands down..

Answer 4

Well if your family has any respect for you and your baby then they will not smoke around her. You can't even have her in the same house as ANYONE that smokes. So If your house is smoke free have them come over to your house and visit with the baby. I also had 2 premature babies I understand your concern. They also need to understand that their clothing will still have harmful smoke on it that can harm the baby. Good luck ! And stand your ground on this issue.

Answer 5

Okay, we have a similar situation. My son has mild asthma. Everyone in my wife's family smokes. SHE had asthma growing up and they still smoked in the house, which made it infinitely worse for her. They did it anyway. So when my son was first born, my wife was worried that her family would think she was being mean-spirited and unforgiving when we would not go over to their house.... like she was getting back at them for smoking when she was little. And they have given us a little static about not coming to their house. But we talked about it and stated it in simple terms: Our son has asthma. Smoke makes him sick. We won't come to your house unless you don't smoke in the house. And you can't smoke when you come to our house.

We still don't ever spend the night at their house. MY parents live about 45 miles away, so we always stay with them. Even when her family doesn't smoke in the house for a week prior to our visit, we still come away smelling like smoke. My son doesn't have too much problem with that level of smoke residue. Only once or twice, when he already had a cold or something, did he seem to cough any. But we really don't like having to wash all our clothes and baby bedding when we leave there to go back to MY parents house to spend the night. We've even had to yell at them when they go out on the porch at our house to smoke. They come back in --surprise!--stinking of smoke, and want to hold the baby.

It can obviously be a touchy issue. But as long as you explain that it's nothing personal and you aren't trying to judge them or use the baby as a pawn to make them quit, you'll be okay. If you explain that it's for the health of the baby and they still don't agree, then you just going to have to stop visiting and having them over. That's an awful result, but the health of your baby is much more important than the feelings of a mature adult who should know better. Send me a note if you wanna discuss further!

Answer 6

Just tell everyone, they can come over to visit---smoking only allowed outside, but you won't be coming over for a while while they are smoking inside their homes.

Second hand smoke is bad for anyone, and they should respect your choice. Especially since your little one's lungs are even more suseptable. Maybe it will give everyone else motivation to quit.

Answer 7

let me just tell you. My son was 7 weeks early and now is 14 years old. He still to this day has respitory issues. It is a real struggle to keep him well.
Even the smell of cigs on your clothing will set off his asthma and allergies.

1. post a sign on your front door.
2. Inform all of your family that you will not be visiting due to your childs best interest.

I would say if your family does not respect your choices then I say to HELLO with them.
Your child can not speak for herself-it is you duty as her mother to do so.

Answer 8

Tell them she is at risk and may need an inhaler with continued exposure to smoke. Tell them You're sorry it has come to this, but for the health of the baby, they will have to visit at your place, where smoking will not be allowed. The "bad person" is certainly not you. Do what you must to protect your child.

Answer 9

I'm sorry, not to be judgemental about your family, but what the hell is wrong with them! A lot of my family smokes, and no-one smokes around the babies or kids in our family .... not to mention the fact that your baby is a newborn, who was a premie.... I would tell them if they don't respect the fact that is unhealthy for the baby that you are not going to come there anymore, they can go to your house where they have to smoke outside.....

Answer 10

You are the parent now and you just *have* to put your foot down and tell them. You must sit them down and tell them that she cannot be in a house with people smoking. If they cannot abide by the rules at their house, the can come to yours to see the baby, and go outside to smoke.

It's hard to change roles from being the child, but you have to make that transition for your child's sake.

Be firm and explain the consequences for your daughter if they cannot stop smoking around her.

Best of luck to you...be firm.