What is the best way someone can contribute financially to someone in medical duress?

Question

I have a friend who was just diagnosed with cancer. I want to either find a way I can help to raise the money or find a foundatrion or charity that would be able to help. Please give only serious suggestions, I have watched both my parents die and then I was too young to help so now I want to do the best I can for my friend.

Answer 1

Hi,
As far as the help goes, the best thing you can do is be there for your friend emotionally. Depending on the type of cancer and in what stage it is in will determine what if anything can be done to save your friend's life. As far as monetary needs, he/she should apply to Medicaid or Medicare for benefits. (under the status of a terminal illness.) Medicaid if your friend has less than $2,000.00 in the bank or investments. They are allowed to keep their house and their car if it is more than 2 years old. Medicare under early permanent disability waiver. If your friend has more than this in their accounts then apply anyway so that you open up a medical record of need for them. They will soon get down to that level with the costs of treatment.When that happens then to activate their request just takes a flip of a switch. Depending on how long he/she has to live if nothing else the benefits can be activated even after death with the qualifying documentation of bills owed for treatment. But the clock starts when the application is received so do it right away.

There is already funding that exists under these two programs. Raising money for them and letting them put it in their account will disqualify them from Medicaid if funds are greater than $2,000.00.

Life is a journey for each one of us.How long or how short, most of us don't know and we really have little control over this.What we do while we are here is another story. Help your friend by being a friend. I am sure if this is happening early in their life, they feel a little scared and alone. If you want to do something useful then be there as a friend and help them not walk alone on their journey.... sometimes that is the only thing they really need and the reality is this is something you will have control over. The rest of it if you think you have some control then you are mistaken.

I have a friend who is in her last 3 months of life with stage 4 lung cancer. I am giving you advice I am following myself and it is appreciated more than the crown jewels to her. (my mom died of brain cancer at the age of 27 and I was only 7 so I know the sensation of being powerless.... but use your power where it really can make a difference.)

Answer 2

I think the best thing to do is to get a moment when you can sit down quietly with your friend and ask your friend exactly what he/she needs financially during this time. They may need different things financially as time progresses and they are undergoing whatever treatment(s) are necessary. Your friend might need help with the immediate basics, like food, paying the rent/mortgage/utilities/car payments, child care/pet care, etc. I think you want to speak to an attorney, as well. See who has the power of attorney for your friend - see if they want it to be you. If you have the power of attorney, (which will occur after you both sign the appropriate forms with an attorney) then you can open a checking account, and also begin to have the bills automatically paid out of that account. Your friend (as you know from previous experience with cancer) will need all their strength and focus just to fight the cancer. They may get way too sick to deal with anything else, and that is where you can possibly be the most helpful. They will also need regular transporation to and from their doctor/hospital/chemo/radiation appointments. Also, what about a nurse at home to assist with bathing and helping them with bathroom needs?

What a lucky friend you have. Good luck, and I hope I was helpful to at least some extent.