My husband is chemically dependent and I had to leave him. We have only been married since June '06. He is in the army & we have a one year old daughter. He is set to deploy April 15th, right now he is in Washington and my daughter and I are in Iowa. He will only be in Iowa for a week of leave in March, if any paperwork needs to be taken care of. I want sole custody of our daughter, he has made very poor choices and does not know how to care for her basic needs, even. How hard will it be to get a separation or divorce finalized if he will not agree to me having sole custody (I will never budge on that, he has only been in her life since she was 4 months old because he was too busy doing drugs and partying during my pregnancy and first months of her life)? I want to go speak with an attourney as early as next week about all this, but any info you can give me will be helpful.
2007-02-21 04:25:17 · 6 answers · asked by .*AnNa*. 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are going to an attorney on base or off base.Let the lawyer know what he does with his spare time.If he can be made aware of you getting the lawyer and him knowing his habit, he may not fight the custody or divorce.Play all your cards even if you have to let the Army know about his problem...His habit will bite him in the rear,make sure to get your child support taken out of his pay automatically and sent to you before he leaves out.Good luck and be careful...
2007-02-21 05:03:58 · answer #1 · answered by Maw-Maw 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The Army has a lot of support services for families in the military, so I'd suggest that you start there. There is a link below to Army services for families.
You will need to speak to an attorney about the custody arrangement. Normally, it's hard to control the custody issue without bringing your husband's chemical dependency into the discussion. It is best to talk to an attorney.
2007-02-21 04:30:18 · answer #2 · answered by Faith 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, yes, yes, speak with a lawyer, please. You can only achieve sole custody if you can prove (and obviously you can) that he is an unfit parent. You can't really *agree* on custody and have it be a sure thing, though, since courts decide custody on what is in the best interest of the child and can completely disregard any agreement the two of you make if they deem necessary.
I suggest packing up and leaving before he comes back in March. Good luck.
2007-02-21 04:33:43 · answer #3 · answered by Undomestic Goddess 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you can probably have both options seperation or divorce ready for his visit. At that point the ball will be in his court to seek a lawyer, and fight for visitation, etc. You may have a long court battle in the making, or it could be relatively easy, It all depends on his choices once served. My instinct with what you have wrote here, is that he won't fight to much in this case, but that is really only a guess.
2007-02-21 04:35:01 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel comfortable telling me which Army Post you are, I can find the appropriate website and help you get in touch with your local support office . I wonder how he has escaped the random drug testing the Army is so fond of.
2007-02-21 04:37:12 · answer #5 · answered by SlyAlice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Faith on this, but the bigger question is how has he not been courtmartialed for drug dependancy.
2007-02-21 04:35:57 · answer #6 · answered by H.B.K. 2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋