How do I convince my parents that my boyfriend is a great catch?

Question

My parents hate my boyfriend. They've gone so far as to tell me to my face that he's the worst thing to ever happen to me! The thing is, I have NO idea why. He's romantic, attentive, sweet, strong and so so loving. We've been together for over two years.
The major problem that my mother seems to have is that he's not very finacially secure, he doesn't have a lot of savings, or own a house. That's not a big deal for me, after all, I'm a student with 50,000 debt. We both work, we get by... there are just things that are more important than money to me.
What do I do? Can I convince my parents that he's as wonderful as I know he is? Can I deal with the consequences if I can't convince them? I love my boyfriend and I don't want to leave.

Answer 1

Well, let me just tell you from experience. First of all, I am probably old enough to be your Mom. But, I am also very open minded for my age. And I feel enlightened. My husband was not liked by my family either when first met and were dating or in the beginning of our marriage. Over the years, they have learned to love him as one of their own. My husband's parents came from wealth and always felt that I was never good enough for him. Now we have been married for 27 years and are very happy and in love to this day. As I have gotten older, raised my own children and sent them into the world, I have learned some things. First of all kids don't owe their parents anything. It was the parents decision and responsibility to have them and raise them. Kids don't owe their parents anything for doing what the parents were supposed to do. As well I have learned that love and your needs for it change as time goes by. And in my experience, there is only one love that is truely fullfilling. The love of a companion. Providing that the companion is your soul mate. And you and only you can determine that. Listen to you heart, if you are truely honest with yourself, you will know the answer to that question.
There isn't anything else that matters in the end. Not money, social acceptance, status or approval from others. In the end, even parents cannot fill that special void of the soulmate.
So be true to yourself, and happiness will be inevitable and long lasting.
What you have to do beyond that is to learn not to let what others say bother you. Stand up for yourself and your feelings. Be in control of your life by taking control. This comes with confidence that you can make your own decisions without doubting yourself. Be confident with you decisions. Know that you can be happy. Don't just wish it. Exude it to all who challenge your conviction to it. You will grow stronger each time. Good luck with this.

Answer 2

I'm in a similar situation, except I'm the boyfriend. I can say for certain that the only way your family will accept him is if they choose to. He can become financially secure, he can bend over backwards and conform in every way, and in the end it will only be enough if your family accepts it as enough.

This may be hard for you to hear and/or do, but the right thing for the two of you to do is to keep doing what you're doing. If your relationship works out and you are both happy, eventually your family will accept that if they want to be part of your life they are simply going to have to accept him. Not only that, but they will likely respect you for doing the right thing even when they opposed you. That is, assuming your famliy is composed of decent, relatively intelligent people. Nothing personal - it's just not a guarantee that they are, especially if this guy is as great as you say he is.

And, yes, if your family isn't so great, then you'll have to be prepared for a rough time by being with him. In the end, you'll either have to make your own family or keep working to save your family. Either way, I can tell you this for certain:

You will be happy.

Stay in school, love him like you love life, and do what you think is right. And remember that we're all here, the good and the bad, when you have another question. Good luck.

Answer 3

If I were you, I would sit down with your parents and have a civilized conversation with them. Ask them what it is about him that they don't approve of, and LISTEN! Try not to get defensive because your polite conversation will turn into a screaming match. Besides, they may have a good point or 2, you never know. Give them the chance to explain their feelings, then explain yours. If you're really serious about this guy and you really see this going somewhere, you need to let your parents know that. With any luck they can learn to let go and let you make your own decisions, whether they feel that it's a mistake on your part or not. Whatever you do, don't let this disagreement ruin the relationship you have with your parents. As awful as it sounds, boyfriends unfortunately come and go. Family is forever.

Answer 4

I would venture to say that there is more to your parent's objection to your boyfriend than his lack of financial stability. While it is possible that your parents may never feel that any guy would be good enough for their little girl, I suggest that you really try to hear what they are saying and give it careful consideration. Don't allow them to rule your life, but do listen to their perspective. They have wisdom that only comes from life experience.
If you still believe that your boyfriend is Mr. Wonderful, communicate to your parents that you respect their views, but firmly disagree. Since you are obviously a grown woman, you have the right to make your own decisions and the responsibility to live with the consequences whether good or bad.

Answer 5

Courtship, engagement, marriage, sex, in that order, era! it really is the healthiest for you interior the longer time period. No guilt. : ) in the journey that your moms and dads say no to this holiday jointly then it really is not any. appreciate them for they're searching on your acceptable interests, your psychological and actual wellbeing. Seeing you've already been jointly like a married couple, then trust isn't on your vocabulary. Ask God for forgiveness and purify your self by replacing your recommendations and not at all napping with this boy lower back! Admit to him that you both made a mistake and also you should make issues proper. do not pass in this holiday. you're not to any extent further fooling absolutely everyone; your target is to be jointly. it really is a temptation you want to avert until eventually marriage. Are you planning on marrying this boy and residing jointly for some thing of your lives? Or are you in effortless words being a loose female with someone who truly has no objective on making you his spouse? Have self appreciate; Jesus loves you and needs you to do issues proper. Take heed helpful female.

Answer 6

Talk to them, i would sit them down separetly....and do it. If this is someone serious then you might as well. People sometimes see things sometimes ppl in love don't. Look at both sides and listen to what they say. Doesn't hurt to take their thoughts.

Good luck. that is a hard situation!!!!

Answer 7

They will always have their opinion about who you date. They just want the best for you. You have to make ur self happy before you can please them though. As long ur happy that's all that matters. They will learn to accept him. You see parts of him they don't see and probably never will see.

Answer 8

Forget it... parents will have their opinions until they get ready to change them... Just do what I did, move away!

Answer 9

His love for you will only last as long as a cheap litted cigarette

Answer 10

you wont but its your life and your choice...my daughter didnt listen and she will always struggle cuz she loves him..