I have a question about my impotence and should I let my wife have occasional sex on the side with young studs

Question

This is a serious question that she and I talked about and I am needing serious educated responses. I have been 50% impotent due to diabetes now for 8 years. My lovely wife of 49 years has stood by me through my adult onset diabetes and told me she loved me no matter what. I thought that to show a little gratitude to my wife, that I would let her occasionally have sex on the side with young men that she might fancy. I feel bad for her being deprived of sex and she being so loyal to me, that I would allow her to have an occasional treat. PLEASE, SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY.

She does have a toy that she likes, it's one of those big Sean Michaels life likes. But still, it's not the same and I know she misses it. If she could separate the emotion and just look at it as sex and still love me after, then I think it could work but i need more opinions.

To those that keep bringing up toys. YES, SHE HAS ONE OF THOSE BIG SEAN MICHEALS LIFE LIKE DONGS

Answer 1

When I was 23, I rented a large home (with friends) on Long Island Sound for the summer. A neighbor who was a successful attorney, went out of his way to introduce me to his wife and subtley point out some common interests we had. This seemed friendly but a little odd, but mostly it was comfortable and fun.
One day when I went over to their house, she (Ann) was in a light summer robe. She teased me then seduced me. I was slightly delrious and nervous, but she was warm and gently. She explained that her husband couldn't meet some of her needs. She thought that I was safe to experiment with. We "played around" several times before we actually had sex.
I didn't really know if this was trouble or heaven, but I got involved because she was very attractive and nice. Since it was only a 3-4 month internship before I moved again it seemed safe enough because of the time limitations.
I learned alot about physical imtimacy and she enjoyed being a teacher. There was never a conflict that I was aware of. Thirty years later, I have fond memories of that time. They seemed to have a solid relationship and I was never considered a threat to that. So, these things can happen and be a positive experience if the participants are emotionally stable enough to handle it.

Answer 2

Don't do it, there is so much more to life than sex and they make many products that you and your wife could use together to still have an intimate relationship. Being with you through thick and thin is what a good marriage is all about, you are just inviting trouble when inviting strangers into your relationship. So many people these days are not to be trusted, don't allow someone to ruin the special bond you and your wife have. Take her on an amazing trip, see places you've never seen before together, do things you've never done before, just enjoy the fact that you still have each other, don't make sex such an important issue, cause there's so much more to live for.

Answer 3

Two things jump out at me on this one John.

First and most important......why not just be creative and satisfy her in ways that dont involve your penis during the 50% of the time it isnt working properly?

Secondly......and I dont mean to sound callous here.....but if you have been married to her for 49 years she may be of an age where finding "young studs" for her may be a little hard to do.

I think the best thing you could do is forget the other sex partners and please her the best you can with what you have. After this many years you must have a pretty good idea of what she likes and how to push her buttons to get her bell to ring. The other partners thing may sound like a good idea but it could also cause big problems.

Answer 4

You should never let another man touch your wife anyway you look at it it is adultery you are married you can still have a pleasurable sex life with out using your dick. Now it has been 49yrs so you must know how to use your tongue, and your hands well incorporate your working tools with her toy and well you shall bring her the pleasure she is looking for if your heart is okay what about Viagra. Do not feel bad it is in the wedding vows for better or worse till death us part if your wife had any reason to do this she would have already but come on your wife is sacred and yours alone thats what mariage is all about. Good Luck with what you decide but I would never let another man
be with my wife period until I'm six feet under that is then she can make her own choice.

Think for yourself one thing I consider in a hard choice or decision is what would Jesus do?

Answer 5

Sorry but the answer is no. If she has stood by your side through the vow of "in sickness and in health" she should stand by your side through the vow of faithfulness. If you're worried about the sexual part of it, my suggestion would be adult novelties and toys. That way, you can still both be part of the experience and it's just extended foreplay without penetration. There are things such as massage oils; toys that require batteries (I don't know what Yahoo will let me post!); blindfolds; feather ticklers; and a lot of other things you can still do together that doesn't involve the "limosine" going into the "garage". Good luck with everything.

Answer 6

You told her that she loves you no matter what.You have answered your question.She has stood by you so far and will continue to.The only form of gratitude you can offer her is by letting her know how thankful you are.Love and care for her with all your heart and soul forever.That's the best treat she deserves.
I think such loyal dedicated wife that's happy with you no matter how you are will not expect any occasional treat from others.

Answer 7

Sounds like you have a great wife now, why would you want to change that? She must really love you. I think you should just be thankful that she is such a good woman. What if she had sex with someone else and then felt guilty, even though you allowed it? Not a good idea in my humble opinion.

Answer 8

No, you don't want to allow her to do that. It would cause more problems then it's worth. There are other things you can do for her. There are things the both of you can do together. Talk with your doctor and see if there are any suggestions he can make regarding sex. There are a lot of people out there with diabetes and impotentcy problems. Never allow another person to get in the marital bed.

Answer 9

That is something you and your wife would have to discuss seriously. You have to be willing to let your wife sleep with someone else to begin with and then how comfortable would you feel about it anyway. If your wife has her own way of dealing with it then let her continue doing so because you are both asking for hurt if you let her sleep with other people. But I think both of you have to be totally upfront and honest before anything happens with someone else. You both should just put it all on the table and discuss the issue and come up with a compromise.

Answer 10

well thats an interesting question well to me there is no consent to adultury even if u say its ok if she say she loves u no matter what then she means it, don't let because ur penis let u down turn u away from ur sex life if u have diabeties then it can be treated they have a medication for diabeties and erectile problems its not ur fault talk it over with her let her understand i know she will help u love can overcome any obsticle thrown at u go to church pray and i know everthing will work out for the best i hope this helps u. GOOD LUCK!!!