Recently, we have been arguing over anything and everything. Its money, food, cooking where we live, me studying and not working. I am sure it is the cultural differences as i am english and he is indian. I feel so depressed at the thought of us being together for the rest of our lives. We have been married for 4 years and i am really losing my head. I love him dearly but i am tearing my hair out. Please help.
2007-02-20 21:31:01 · 16 answers · asked by arsenalbelle 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
every marraige goes throught this, you are not alone, me and my husband have just gone through a very bad patch which resulted in me leaving, its only when your away from your spouse or 1 of you becomes ill that you realise just what you have got, you love this man or you wouldnt have married him, think back to the early days, what did he do that made you feel so special.. youve just lost the spark but it WILL return. dont give up. speak to him about how you feel, come to a compromise, no two person is the same and everyone will have disagreements but part of a marraige is to make each other happy and he needs to understand this. youre studying i presume for a better job in the future!!its better than being stuck in a dead end job. and where you live is a big issue, you both need to be happy with your home or it can wreck a relationship.talk to him, show him what youve wrote, get it all out in the open. i hope it works for you, good luck xXx
2007-02-20 22:14:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Arrange a date with your husband out of the house for you both to talk. Talking things through in an open public place will stop you from arguing and hopefully you can talk better. Communication is a big issue here,you are both unhappy but maybe get your feelings out in the open and give it 6 months and see if things improve. Good luck
2007-02-21 06:44:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, your marriage seems to be in trouble but its never too late to turn things around. communication goes a long way to solvin most problems.
u need to sit down with him and talk things through. when u got married 4 yrs ago, both of u must have been in love. u didn't let cultural differences stop u from getting married. so u need to do the excitin things u did back then. work out together what u need to do to put things right. keep calm and things will work out cos both of u want it to. i really wish u all the best.
2007-02-21 07:07:21 · answer #3 · answered by rambo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be patient! I think the best thing you can do is Assuming you have talked to him about it millions n millions of times and it never seemed to have worked.
Just take a break for a while. When i say break i mean just take things easy be laid back. Dont take everything he say on your heart coz its very easy to tke things negatively in this situation.
Your marriage is not failing its just you both need to talk about other things rather then talking about things which you both know will end up in arguments. Even after all arguments, you are still saying you LOVE him proves this marriage is not failing.
Try not to talk about issues ending up in arguments, but if it does happen just try to be patient, I m sure he will stop after sometime.
2007-02-21 07:13:40 · answer #4 · answered by Unknown Entity 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am from that school of thought which always goes for keeping families together i think if love is still there things would get better there are a lot of queries which r required to give a final decision at this stage like off shoots financial position etc
so in given condition just you two shud lower ur standards expectations and wait for some more time before deciding some thing odd
2007-02-21 07:10:55 · answer #5 · answered by Caring 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bi-racial marriages only have a 10% success rate (USA statsitic).
Yes, the cutural differences are overwheling between Westerners and Indians; even between American blacks and American Whites.
What attracts in the beginning, usually repels at the end in this type of situation.
There is no right or wrong in this situation. I hope you can end as friends and both go your own ways. Your real needs are not being met--neither his nor yours. Why torture yourselves. You both deserve to be happy and fullfilled.
2007-02-21 05:40:50 · answer #6 · answered by Alea S 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If depression is creeping in now is the time to see your gp,sadly culture clashes are all to common today ,and after 4years if the cracks are appearing that not good.You dont mention children ,so to be totally upfront with you if you really love him a heart to heart is needed ,if that fails let him go for your sake ,and continue studying.best of luck.
2007-02-21 05:59:54 · answer #7 · answered by not a mused 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your marriage only is failing if you want it to. Work together with your husband through this hard time and stop the fighting. Remember it takes two to fight. Seek help and counseling for you and for your marriage. This really can be worked through together. Do not give up on your marriage.
http://www.drphil.com
2007-02-21 07:30:38 · answer #8 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sit down and sort things out, try to control your temper, if he yells at you try to stay quiet, that will definitely help you instead of getting hyper. Discuss over the issues which lead to an arguement and avoid getting into a fight, just walk out if things get heaty, divorce is not necessarily the solution in every case
2007-02-21 05:40:43 · answer #9 · answered by faiza_t 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, I think its normal to argue, no marriage is perfect, just sit down with him and talk about everything openly, if you can find middle way solution, then thats good. otherwise, you must seperate. simple.
Why dont you leave the house for a while, this will calm things down.
good luck
2007-02-21 05:37:34 · answer #10 · answered by Maria 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋