Am I selfish for thinking about walking away from a 3 year relationship + a kid because my bf doesn't want to get married or have other kids? He said he might change his mind, but do I stay and 10 years down the road realize I might have lost something I can't get back?
2007-02-20 20:13:01 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Some brutal honesty..It seems like the only reason he is with you is for the kid. Split ways but still let him see the kid. As much as you want nothing but for your child to be happy, dont you deserve happiness too? That being with someone who loves and cares about you enough to say "This is my wife"..
2007-02-20 20:31:51 · answer #1 · answered by KOOSE 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Its about what YOU want. Its also about risking. Would you see yourself being happy 10 years along the track with no one whether you stayed or not? Or should you open those possibilities of finding that special someone who wants the same things as you.
There's lots of pros and cons - should you stay for the kids sake? or should you go and do what you want to do to make yourself happy?
My personal belief is not to be in a relationship if theres any doubts, a chance at you being unhappy or any chance of your partner being unhappy.
Weigh up the pros and cons and see which side sticks out more for you. then follow your gut instinct. i'm sure in the end you'll work out the best direction for both your kid and yourself.
2007-02-20 20:50:31 · answer #2 · answered by ppl_tell_me_im_insane 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Am sorry you are in such a situation , but after a child and three years he may never change, because by now he would be sure about the future.
My boyfriend once told me he never wanted to get married , he changed his mind and three years after wedding he says it was a mistake and wants me out of his life.
Be wise.
Wish you all the best.
2007-02-20 20:22:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
All getting married does is change how you file your taxes.
A "ceremony" performed by a "holy" man of "God".
Why the obsession with tying the knot? You obviously aren't saving yourself for marriage.
I believe only-children are smarter(unfortunately sometimes also spoiled!)
You must not care about this guy very much if you are considering bailing on him over the distinction of your name beginning with Mrs. or Miss.
2007-02-20 21:09:07 · answer #4 · answered by hambycat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what about the child? what would be best for them? you should have thought of these things a long time ago but you are now in a lose lose situation..you will lose your BF and lose the father of your child. few men you meet will treat your child like the father would..its not fair to your baby..you should have been thinking of his welfare first last and always..until he is old enough to take care of himself..just no more children...then that would really cook your goose
2007-02-20 20:20:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him about this scenario...Dont push him that hard since its really really a big thing...Marriage should comes from the heart and not just because you "obliged" to it by the kid...In time, when his head is clear, you will know the answer.....For now, stay with him and be supportive about your situation....Just dont give him pressure....
2007-02-20 20:25:45 · answer #6 · answered by silly girl.... 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Three years is long enough to wait. Tell you boyfriend that either you will set a date (in the very near future) or you will have to find someone who shares your dreams - a marriage and more than one child.
2007-02-20 20:20:17 · answer #7 · answered by Liz 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stay! Maybe he just needs more time. You might be making him feel a little pressured about it at the moment. Some guys need to feel like it's their idea, even if it isn't!
2007-02-20 20:18:27 · answer #8 · answered by impossiblemama 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
analyze it first. think about it a hundred times. if you think nothing will cone out of it, walk away. build a new life. better still, have a serious talk with your bf. if nothing came out of it, then you're free.want to get your kid?
2007-02-20 20:18:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
what will u do with yr kid in case u leave
if u stayed 3 yrs what will the marriage add to yr realationship
2007-02-20 20:18:04 · answer #10 · answered by stranger 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋