2007-02-20 13:42:18 · 33 answers · asked by Vanessa L 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
No way! At that age, you can't spoil her. She's crying because she needs you for something...even if it's just reassurance. It's important that you go to her. If she were 10 months old, I could understand letting her wait for a bit, but at a month...you shouldn't let her cry.
2007-02-20 13:45:47 · answer #1 · answered by Lisa E 6 · 4⤊ 1⤋
I've seen a lot of varing answers thus far, but one thing remains true: No one knows your daughter like you do. If you're certain she's full, clean, and not in pain (hasn't had an ear infection, isn't running a fever, clothes are loose and she's not too hot or cold) it could simply be just crying to cry.
I know people say that it's uncaring or mean to not pick a crying baby up, but after having my own and feeling so conflicted about what to do (pick her up even though I know she's only crying because she's tired and fighting sleep or let her keep crying?) I decided that no one else could make the choice for me. If I was certain she was fine and just crying to cry, then I'd let her lay there for a few minutes (10-15 minutes) and if she didn't stop, then I'd go in and pick her up, rock her a little, and try to put her back down.
I know it's hard- it's really hard when you're trying to do the dishes, make dinner, and you have a baby that's perfectly fine by crying because you're not *right there*... I even went so far as to have my mom make me a baby sling, but I only wore it once or twice- I just couldn't see what it helped keeping her that close when my whole purpose is to teach her independence...
At about 4 months, she began to realize that crying just because she was tired wasn't necessary, and now (at 7 months) she's so independent and capable... she's advanced for her age, and she's very trusting of people- she hasn't went through the 'afraid of strangers' stage, and I honestly don't think she will.
I'm not saying that I think it's right for everyone, but go with your gut. If you feel like she needs you, pick her up. I do think it's possible to teach them to respond to behaviors at any age (I cry and mom comes running) so I feel like you have to differentiate between a need and a want at any age.
I hope that helped some. Best of luck!
2007-02-20 14:00:02 · answer #2 · answered by beccalynn14bb 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
No, a baby that young should not be left to cry that long. First, you cannot spoil a baby because they cry for a reason and do not yet understand cause and effect. Actually, by tending to your baby while they are young they are more comfortable and secure and are less likely to cry often when they are older. A newborn baby cries for a reason and has no other way to communicate when they need something and if left to cry and not tended to can be very frightening for the baby. This also increases their stress level and could led to other problems.
2007-02-20 14:13:37 · answer #3 · answered by hcarebear87 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
at one month, I would say that anything over 5 minutes means the child is hungry.
When a baby that young cries, it can mean several things, they are hungry, they feel insecure, they are cold, they are uncomfortable (wet or messy diaper)
After your baby is changed and fed, wrap her securly in her baby blanket. This is like swaddling and is secure enough that the child cannot move their arms. I've said it a million times, and people seem to think it's cruel or something, but the truth is, swaddling makes a child - especially a newborn - feel very secure. Your child will relax almost right away, you can hold her securely until she settles and lay her down to sleep.
ps - NEVER wake a sleeping baby - even if it's "feeding time". let your baby dicate her feeding schedule for the first 2 months at least, then start to moderate to fit your schedule.
2007-02-20 13:48:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm a mother of 5 and have a lot of experience with this. I'm not afraid to let a baby cry. When I know a baby is changed, fed, and comfortable, I don't see a problem letting them cry. ESPECIALLY when they stop as soon as you pick them up. If they are able to stop crying as soon as they feel you picking them up, then you can be absolutely certain that nothing is wrong with them other than wanting to be held. An upset stomach or any other pain wouldn't stop just by you picking them up. Good luck!
2007-02-20 14:30:11 · answer #5 · answered by Mish B 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
i am big on the believe that until your baby is 6 months old that they cant be held to much and they wont get spoiled if you hold them a lot until that 6 month period so unless its for some major reason they don't need to cry if its because your trying to get things done try getting a sling or a front pack this might help baby be close to you but your hands are still free.
2007-02-20 13:47:01 · answer #6 · answered by peterpansdate 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
One month is too young. You're not teaching her anything by allowing her to cry.. except that she's all alone and nobody cares that she's tired, or hungry, or sleepy, or wet, or wanting some cuddling.
Start letting her cry it out when she's old enough to be expressing an opinion, not a need... When she's trying to cry to get you to pick her up because she just wants it, then the option is yours... At this point, though, she doesn't know anything about that and is just crying. Making her continue crying at this age is not appropriate.
2007-02-20 18:50:52 · answer #7 · answered by Amy S 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
To the OP, no, you shouldn't let an infant cry like that. Don't let anyone try to tell you that. Follow your heart and your motherly instincts, and you will do a great job.
To a few of the others.....Oh my God, you make me sick. Why don't you just give your children to someone who will love them and nurture them?? Using controlled crying on an older infant during sleep training is one thing (which I don't agree with, but still) but just letting a baby cry as long as its fed and changed just because you don't want to pick them up???
I can't believe people would let a newborn cry itself into hopelessly giving up, just so their lives are more convenient. Nothing like cherishing the gift huh.
2007-02-20 16:09:14 · answer #8 · answered by EMT_and_Mom_to1 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I've had five children of my own- yes on purpose....lol
Any infant is too young to just let cry. After about five to six months you can let them alone for very short periods of time to 'cry' it out but never allow your baby to think he/she is all alone.
Your baby has grown to rely on you for protection and staying alive. And as far as they are concerned you're the ONLY one that matters to them.
Infants cry for a reason. Not because they are spoiled. The main reasons are: Wet, hungry, tired, scared, and pain
Do a run through of all these things and most likely you'll find the answer. It takes a little while to learn the types of cries as well...just listen to your baby and soon you'll know.
If the reason your little one is crying is due to needing sleep? Then you can leave them in the bed...but do NOT leave them alone. Pat the back or bottom gently...and talk to him/her in a soothing voice to get them to calm down or just to show that you are there for them. Eventually (and it may feel like YEARS) the infant will fall asleep, secure in knowing that you are a hand away.
I've even been known to curl my arm up around them and get real close to soothe them to sleep. Sometimes humming works too. It's up to you to find out how you and your baby 'click'.....but leaving them alone to cry isn't one of the ways to do that.
2007-02-20 14:05:30 · answer #9 · answered by Lynn D 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Nooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That is mean! I don't care if its 2:00 in the morning on a saterday, and I have'nt gotten any sleep in the past week, I would stil pick up my baby. I don't have one 'cuz i'm 14 and all, but I have a baby brother thats 20 months old, and I still get him out of his bed when he crys.
2007-02-20 13:48:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋