I have a horrible habit where I just can't wait to get to the next step. They become more than a goal. It's a cycle: I'm in love, I want to be engaged: if I was engaged, I'd want to be married; if I was married, I'd want to have children. It is like this in most aspects of my life but especially in my relationship with my boyfriend. I don't understand why I just can't be content and slow down and enjoy my life! How do I look forward to these things without letting them control my life ? and how do I quit trying to rush them? (I also have this insane fear that I won't be able to have kids so I need to start trying now. This isn't based on anything at all. Is it really odd for me to feel this way?)
2007-02-20 13:09:39 · 11 answers · asked by Amanda 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I think that you are not alone with this problem. Many people are always looking into the future, rather than enjoying the here and now.
You need to start living your life on a day-to-day basis. In other words, live in the present. None of us know if we will still be here tomorrow, so we need to concentrate on making the most of today.
Make good use of any talents you may have (writing, artistic, musical, etc.). Do things to keep yourself healthy (eat right, get plenty of fresh air and exercise). Take classes or learn to do a hobby that really interests you.
Go out to fun places with your boyfriend, and really enjoy yourself. Don't always be cooped up in the house, or just hanging out randomly.
2007-02-20 13:20:57 · answer #1 · answered by Holiday Magic 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You left out a couple of parts of your question.
How old are you? And how many times have you done this?
If you are not very old, and have done this a few times, I'd say that maybe you are rushing the situation(s) a bit and have developed a complex. The part about not being able to conceive is irrational, also, and maybe could use a little therapy.
If you are older, and have never been married, there is nothing irrational about that. I can certainly understand why you would want to move on with your life.
If not, maybe you should be alone for a while, learn to be independent and trust in yourself for happiness before trying a relationship. Some people look to relationships for their happiness, when they should be happy FIRST then look to a relationship for completion. Maybe then you will be able to relax and take things a step at a time.
If you do these things and still feel overwhelmed or unhappy, there is nothing wrong with seeking some professional help and guidance. That's what therapists are there for!
2007-02-20 13:18:21 · answer #2 · answered by luvmelodio 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm 27... I had a little too much fun a littler earlier in my twenties and decided that life isn't just a party. You can't enjoy life now, and pay later unless you put things on credit (no matter what form). You have to work a little harder in the end this way because you have to pay interest usually on this credit. So, by being a little frugal on not having any debt I find I'm a whole lot happier. When I go on a trip and I can pay cash for everything and I planned it in advance, and I know its not going to put me at risk a little later, I enjoy myself more than I ever did before. It funny too, people don't realize how a little delayed gratification will actually pay off a lot quicker than they might think if they just save that extra money they get when they're cheap about things. A penny saved is really a penny earned.
2016-05-24 00:22:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
life is a journey that ends at the same juncture for everyone. Since the destination isn't anything to look forward to, then the joy must be in the trip. It's simple, slow down and smell the roses you are rushing your life away, there doesn't even need to be a next step. Each moment of the day you may be making memories that will last your lifetime, but instead of a whole bunch of vague memories, why not make them monumental moments in your life by really cherishing each and every one of them while you are making them.
2007-02-20 13:59:24 · answer #4 · answered by al b 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do things to help, serve, make life better for, any other people that you come across your way. Serving and helping others brings ajoy to the heart that cannot be matched. Look for things each day, big or tiny where by you can make life a little brighter for someone else.
It will bring a little sunshine into yoer life and help others at the same time. As the old TV commerical used to say, "Try it, you'll like it."
2007-02-20 13:13:22 · answer #5 · answered by Kerry 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It must be exhausting to feel like that.
Maybe you can teach yourself to live in the moment otherwise you're going to miss out on the fun parts of your life.
2007-02-20 13:13:53 · answer #6 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen to music, music affects people a lot and listen to happy music u enjoy. I always listen to music 24/7
2007-02-20 16:21:20 · answer #7 · answered by The Sweetest Sin 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was given this data by a mental health nurse.
Concentrate on what you have, not what you don't have. And consider this---there's a LOT of people who would love to have what you have.Stop and smell the roses.
2007-02-20 13:14:23 · answer #8 · answered by TedEx 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not only U many people in the world including me r like this only
the one and only solution for this is
"Don't expect more"
2007-02-20 16:07:27 · answer #9 · answered by Night Warrior 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well this has happened to me and the best thing to do is take things slowly and play or do wat u like to do most and just enjoy the time ur doing it with and stuff and just do the things u like and listen tot he things and stuff and life is to short to be thinking bout that stuff just let things happen wen they need to happen
2007-02-20 13:17:35 · answer #10 · answered by ? 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋