My step-daughter (lives with her dad and me full time) has asked to stay at a condo on the beach for spring break. There will be no adults there. Step-daughter is almost 18 and the two cousins she will be with will be 18 and 19 (all girls). Her mom has said she will pay if we let her go. Problem is there will no doubt be drinking and step-daughter has already admitted to her cousin that her boyfriend will be going down there with her. (and that her mom knows this) I personally dont think she should stay. And it's not like we are far from the beach. She can drive there in 15 mins so she could still go down there during the day. What would you do and say in this situation?
2007-02-20 12:56:30 · 15 answers · asked by Charlie D 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Ummmmm....NO - would be my adamant and clear answer. I wonder what on Gods earth her mother is thinking? Don't we all remember being that age and what goes on!
What would I say to her? I would flat out tell her that I loved her too much to let her be in that situation. As her parent I don't need to give her any more of an explanation than that. If she wants to have a party here, in our home under adult supervision fine. They have to get the booze on their own. EVERYONE in the front door has to spend the night. But, under no circumstances would she be spending a weekend without adult supervision and alcohol at her age.
2007-02-20 12:59:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
me being a perent of 2 girls 16 & 19 myself would say yes unless she has given you reasons in the past not to trust her or her cousins. If you live that close to the condo, you and her dad could make a random stop by just to see what is going on. Give her a little room. You are going to have to learn to trust her some time or another. How can she earn your trust if you dont give her a chance?
Its alway hard to let go, but think about it, when you were her age wouldn't you have loved to have the same opportunity to show your parents how well they raised you?
Good luck
2007-02-20 21:06:53 · answer #2 · answered by patti p 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a teenager and i say you will have to look at ur step daughter to see if she is responsible enough to concur negative peer pressure. THink of all the choices she has made and see if she is ready to live on her own with others her same age. If you dont think she is ready than tell her no. Remember u are not suppose to be ur childs best friend ur suppose to guide them. Shes not 18 just yet. Good luck
2007-02-20 21:37:29 · answer #3 · answered by Sexylova49 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you say she is almost 18. What do you mean by that? Is she 17 and 1/2? If so, she is practically an adult. I would let her go. Unless you feel she is irresponsible and will get into wreckless behavior, then don't let her go. It is your call.
Bottom line, you should know where your child (or step child) is at all times, what they are doing, who they are with, and if drugs and alcohol are involved!
2007-02-20 23:10:05 · answer #4 · answered by Mother of 5/Madre de 5 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
o great. a worry-parent.
listen, once someone is 18, they will become a college student. you can't keep college students from being college students. most college students (whether they go to college or not) will end up drinking and/or having sex. College student is just a term for the ages of 18-22. You need to let them learn lessons on their own, so they can grow up and learn to take responsibilty. this is the time where they need to learn things the hard way. So let them go, and life will take course.
2007-02-20 21:11:31 · answer #5 · answered by Russly F 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Whatever can happen during the night can happen during the day.
This is one of the big problems with parents today: they treat their teens like little kids and then complain that they aren't responsible adults when they turn 18.
She is going to do what is going to do. Trying to stand in her way will just make her resent you.
2007-02-20 22:27:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok I agree she shouldnt stay,but what can happen durring the night could happen any time...And what if she does drink?She could be talked into doing it even if shes comming back home...And then she would be drinking and driving...I would give her a good talk,and let her know how much you trust her.So before she does somthing she will regret,she will hear your voice saying you trust her...If she has already had sex with her bf,make sure you tell her to be safe if somthing happens...
2007-02-20 22:11:59 · answer #7 · answered by jill@doodle 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would say " What,you think I just fel loff the turnip truck? I just got in on a bananna boat? HE--- NO!!!! Why, you ask ,"Cause you still live under my roof and you follow MY RULES!!!!!!!YOU think I was born yesterday? I know whats up and whats down!! p.s. OK you can go and I am staying with you & your cousins!! Come to think of it go with the 2nd one, cause if nothing is wrong or funny she will say OK!! After all,you only got to get up 15 min earlier to go to work
2007-02-20 21:44:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Is she a mature 17 year old? and do you trust her? or is she a little on the wild side. My decision would rest on this. Good luck!
2007-02-20 21:06:28 · answer #9 · answered by soozikabloozi 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe after she is 18
2007-02-21 02:39:15 · answer #10 · answered by smallsassy 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋