How is this for a poem? Also, what words rhyme with blankets?

Question

Now I lay me down to sleep,
And slowly I begin to weep
Terrible visions flash behind my eyes,
And I can hear their mournful cries.

And this poem, too.

Silently
Swiftly
Maliciously
The undead warrior
Creeps
Through the dark dense forest
Hunting!
Slaughtering!

Also, this poem.

Hatred is a dark, bottomless pit
It tastes like hard, burnt steak
It sounds like ghostly moans and breaking bones
It smells like bubbling, curdling blood
It looks like a barren, bloody battlefield
Hatred feels like millions of hands dragging you down..down..down

I do not really like poetry, but we have a "poetry book" project. All my poems seem to be so negative.

What I hate about these is the fact that you have to use a certain layout for all of them, so you have to do them a certain way. I hate that because then they're not as good.

Answer 1

I guessed these were for school lol. I have trouble writing "happy" poems as well because I find negative feelings to be stronger than positive ones. My class just finished our poetry unit. I'm a good poet...but writing poems for the poetry book took me FOREVER since I couldn't write anything decent that wasn't super depressing. Last year for my "five sense" poems I used "guilt" and "trust". I like how you used "hatred" though. Your poems are very descriptive and for poems written for school, they're really really good! I like how you use rhyming too. I know you said you don't like poetry, but I think if you wrote some poems without the outlines and boundaries of the directions the teacher gave, you'd find that you're a fantabulous writer! As for words that rhyme with "blankets" sorry I couldn't find any. But here's a website that helps out with rhyming, definitions, synonyms and other stuff that come in handy while writing. http://rhyme.poetry.com/

Answer 2

If you want an honest answer, they're OK, except the first one which is awful- there's nothing original at all about it, and it scans like a Hallmark verse.
The second one needs finishing. It makes no point and the third line would be better if you carried on the alliteration. Maliciously isn't really the right adjective to suit this context, a more physical work would be better. You have created the image well though, I can see the warrior in the forest but it's a tired image and I don't know what you're trying to say ie what the warrior means, because its unfinished state feels directionless.
You have a decent structure building in the third- 1st line Hatred then 4 starting It... which you could expand on but your similes lack invention.

The best subject to write about is what you know- you're an individual as original as anyone else, don't be shy about putting that into words.

I can't think of any one word that rhymes with blankets! You might be better going for a half-rhyme like trinkets.

Answer 3

So light, so fluffy were the blankets
So light, so fluffy were the pancakes

Tho food she did honor with a banquet ( formal dinner)
Pink flowers covered the old banquette (upholstered bench)

Answer 4

First: I think you did well!
You don't have to ryhme the whole word, the last syllable works too. ie: rackets, caskets...
Also, how about replacing behind my eyes with before my eyes?
Aand: how about revising dark dense forest by just using dark?

Answer 5

Watch football after a nice hot lunch.

Answer 6

They need work but they are alright for homework.
baskets
Try writing some on summer days, or activities you like or holidays.

Answer 7

Here's an online rhyming dictionary for you (see below)

Answer 8

they are good but there sort of all negative like youi said. You could talk about love instead of hate. happpier things not so disgusting

Answer 9

wow... those are really dark poems... and theyre only negative because theyre on freakin' zombies, hatered, and some you hearing some someone crying. jeez, i wonder why! (sarcasm)
but theyre pretty good

Answer 10

You have a real talent.
'Anklets' rhymes with blankets.