Should I tell my parents?

Question

I've just recently come out to a cppl of my mates even though ive known the truth for years, and I'm considering telling my parents but they are pentecostal christians and also work within an ex-gay ministry, i know they would be really unhappy, but i also hate lying to them. I consider myself a christian but couldnt imagine telling anybody within my church either? Does anyone think i should tell or have experience in coming out to thier parents when thier parents are totally anti gay?

Answer 1

DON'T TELL THEM UNTIL YOU'RE FREE OF THEIR CONTROL!!! I usually don't use capital letters like that, but it would be a very bad idea for your mental health to come out to them. They'd be very, very likely to force that ex-gay ministry and their ignorant dogma down your throat. They'd do some serious stuff to your mind that could scar you for years. It's happened waaay too often and in your situation, I'd really suggest hiding your sexuality until after you're living on your own. Right now they can force you into an ex-gay ministry and do all sorts of inhumane stuff to you to try to change your sexuality and there's nothing you can do about it.

Answer 2

It's all a matter of what you're comfortable with and what kind of a reaction you think you'll get. If you're out of the house and on your own, at least you don't have to see your parents every day in case they need some time to get used to the idea. The plus side is that you don't have to live a lie for their benefit if you tell them. But if there isn't any other reason to tell, you don't have to. You're still their child, and that trumps gay/straight, or it should.

Answer 3

one million. That i grow to be an entire time smoker til i found out i grow to be pregnant. 2. That I even have performed drugs earlier. 3. misplaced my virginity at sixteen. 4. how many human beings i've got slept with. 5. That i began out eating at an early age. 6. The time I lied approximately while i grow to be staying for clean Years while i grow to be a junior in severe college. 7. Met a guy in guy or woman as quickly as that I met off the information superhighway. 8. pushed drunk a number of situations, lots of those underage. 9. What sexual stuff i'm into. 10. the situations I had my boyfriend sneak into my room while i grow to be sixteen.

Answer 4

I think eventually you will have to come out to them, but first you need to be completely financially independent. You need to be living in your own place and paying all of your bills by yourself. No help for college or occasionally paying a bill. Also, you need a few really good friends who will support you no matter what and who have the patience to be there in your darkest times. Once you have financial independence and friends you can rely on, and once you feel you are ready then you should do it. Be prepared for it to go bad, but realize that the truth will set you free and you will eventually be better for it.

Answer 5

Tough one.
The truth is that you are, and this is who you choose to be,waiting isn't gonna change the outcome,it just prolongs it.If your parents are Christians then they should know that it is not wise to judge or condemn who you choose to be.If your old enough to be out on your own then tell them, if your not,and you have to live under their roof,then your world is about to change,not only will the truth be out but you maybe too. For every action there is a reaction,it really depends on how understanding your parents are.

Answer 6

it's really up for you to decide if and when you "need" to tell them. personally, if you are still a teen and living at home, you might not want to mention it until the time comes when you are out on your own. or, if thetime comes when you are dating someone seriously that you want them to meet. sexual orientation is a very personal subject, and there's never really any obligation to tell parents. it may not be something they need to know, at least not yet.

then again, if you feel trapped and alone and need someone to talk to about this, and if you feel they are the only ones, then give it a try.. but be prepared for negative reactions out of them..

Answer 7

According to the bible this lifestyle is an abomination to the lord. This is why penecostal and other christians disagee so strongly with the gay lifestyle. If you tell them of this they will not be receptive and will probably blow a gasket. This decision will have to be your own and if you decide to tell them I wish you the best of luck and hope they will be understanding.

Answer 8

Hi , I am sorry for such a combination. I know a boy who was actually even in seminary for future priest and he decided to leave and to tell to his parents he is a gay. They rejected him but you know what? If your parents trully love you they will be hurt but they will still love you as thier child. Be ready for a storm and ocean of tears and desperate cries but if you feel to tell them, tell. Try to do it maybe in hints to prepare them and then tell them. Be ready that it may take years until it heals but it will give you freedom to be who you are. i cross my fingers for you. I married in silence man that my parents didn't wanted me, I don't regret i save them tears at my wedding and today it doesn't hurt them anymore and they get along OK with my husband. It took 3 years or more to heal thier pain and dissapointment. He is different religion as me it is why that was a problem... God bless you!

Answer 9

If you think they'll take the news harshly you might want to consider writing a letter and finding a friends house where you can stay at for awhile?

Answer 10

NO. Don't do it. I got thrown out of the house, and completely dis-inherited by my family. I'd strongly advise against it.
But only you can decide for yourself.