My lawyer is filing papers to stop this. This will include ski trips or anything where they can get the impression that this activity is OK. People are saying that what they do with him is up to him even though apparently the courts don't think so. I am tempted to remove custody from him all together.
We are not divorced or even legally separated.
By the way, I am dating someone. This is not about whether he sticks it in a woman, man or horse. I don't want my kids in that environment.
2007-02-20 02:08:04 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hello? Hello? My bf is not spending the night. Thank you. You women haters ( male and female) are simply funny!
2007-02-20 02:18:08 · update #1
My lawyer just called to say that the judge signed the order first thing this morning. Guess the courts can dictate, huh?
2007-02-20 02:19:24 · update #2
No one is keeping the kids away from their father. He just shouldn't have sex with her when my kids are around. He has 1/2 the month to do that.
2007-02-20 02:26:57 · update #3
This is just going to make your divorce get extremely ugly. Why you are so concerned about your children seeing your soon to be ex-husband with another woman does not make sense. If he is sleeping with her in front of the children, that is a problem, but having her around is not.
It sounds more like you are jealous than anything else. Since you are already in a relationship as well, you will not get much support in the court. I would say that you should pick your battles more carefully and try to create an equitable divorce so that your children have two good homes to share their time in.
Remember, you have to have some relationship with your soon to be ex-husband no matter what, since you share children. Why not make it be a working relationship rather than just open hatred?
If your divorce is due to him having an affair than your anger makes sense, but your actions are not going to benefit you or your children in the long run.
Take care,
Troy
2007-02-20 02:22:35 · answer #1 · answered by tiuliucci 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Let me see here, You and your husband are not even separated Legally, yet you are taking him to Court for Full Custody..I have never heard of a Court doing that when you are not even legally Separated. Also and very important, you say he is taking your children around the OW, yet you are dating also. Do you think its ok for you to take your children around the OM you date? It does not sound like you are seeing Both sides of the picture, and if yall go to Court, His Lawyer is gonna use these things I have just said right here to Hurt you. Neither of you need to be seeing anyone else unless you have Separation papers, and you BOTH need to stop using the Kids as Pawns, they have been through enough already with Mom and Dad Splitting up.
2007-02-20 10:20:03 · answer #2 · answered by donna_honeycutt47 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Where do you and this new man of your meet to have a relationship? How old are your children? Be careful what stipulations you put on your "X" after all if it's "law" for him it should also be "law" for you. It can blow up in your face. Children regardless of age are not stupid. If Mommy stays out all night, ( to avoid exposing her children to infidelity) she can be labeled a neglectful parent. Think it out before you put it on paper, and remember in today's world the Father has to want to give up his rights. You both have a right to a life, you don't however have the right to keep your children away from their Father just because you "think" he is sending the wrong message. What do you think your children will say after time goes by and all they hear is what a bad person their Father is? I know my mom kept me from my Father and told me he was a no good son of a xxxxx, I had little respect for her and beyond all her hope an undying love for him. her attempts backfired big time. So unless he is abussing the children, let everyone have a life and be happy. You sound very bitter, be carful, bitter can be deadly. "Horse" get real
2007-02-20 10:25:17 · answer #3 · answered by whateverhohum 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You make it sound like they are having orgys in front of the children. . Your husband will eventually have a wife. How is he suppose to get one if he doesn't have a gf first? As long as he is not bringing home a different girl every night I think you are being unreasonable. Whats important is that your children see love, kindness, compassion, and caring between two adults, and that their parents( you and him) deal with each other with respect when they are watching and listening. I think you are letting your emotions get the best of you here. It is hard to see your X with someone else. I have been divorced for 4yrs and if my X found another it would break my heart. You will always have love for your X, but he deserves to be happy with someone else if the two of you are over. The same goes for you. This "activity" as you put it ,is perfectly normal and natural. What environment are you talking about?( Your kids are not in the bedroom with them) He is behaving just like the two of you did when you were in love with each other. Kids need to see love.
2007-02-20 10:26:29 · answer #4 · answered by sweetpea 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You two are living separate lives so why aren't you divorced or even legally separated. The kids live in the here and now and in the here and now mommies and daddies sometimes cant work out their differences and end up meeting different people that would like to spend time with PERIOD Personally i dont know why he would want to spend time with his other woman while spending time with his kids UNLESS they live together BUT if the other woman isn't posing a threat to your kids ...I dont see the big deal UNLESS the kids have issues regarding it. (u didnt mention the kids ages) One last thought ....you dont want your kids in that enviroment but your legally married to their father and dating someone else so I really dont get your point and purpose. GET A DAMN DIVORCE!!!!!!!!!
2007-02-20 10:20:10 · answer #5 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, I don't think you have this right at all. If the kids aren't in danger from this woman, and the father is devoting his time to them best he can, you shouldn't be upset. I have been through this myself, and the courts generally don't do this sort of thing unless there is a danger to the kids.
2007-02-20 10:17:30 · answer #6 · answered by emt_dragon339 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Let's see.. you are not divorced, not legally separated...yet you are DATING someone? How are you different from him?
What message is THAT sending to your children?
And no, I don't believe for one minute you can enforce your idea of what you think is right on someone else.
I don't believe his actions are right either, but the fact is, no court will dictate to him what he cannot do in that regard.
2007-02-20 10:17:50 · answer #7 · answered by Jed 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
could JEALOUSY be a big part of this?? move on and act like an adult. kids will know the difference sooner or later and there's no sense in you making it later thus hindering their knowledge. let them decide if they want to accept the idea or not of their dad's g/f spending the night.
Mom of B & D
2007-02-21 11:09:14 · answer #8 · answered by Mom of B & D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh so it's ok for YOU to have the BF around with the kids, but the hubby can't have the OW around? You're a double standard bearing Beatch.
2007-02-20 10:14:11 · answer #9 · answered by H.B.K. 2 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hey...if there have been no papers filed by either of you and you are both out screwing around then neither of you can dictate to the other about what they should be or cannot be doing.
2007-02-20 10:12:14 · answer #10 · answered by IGH3Rat 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋