me and my girlfriend arent talking what should i do?

Question

last saturday night (now is monday night) me and my girlfriend got into an argument. weve gotten into worse arguments but we havent ever went this long without talking. i miss her so much and i want to call her but she hung up on me when i was talking which i found very rude and hostile so i dont want to call her back. i dont ever call her (or anybody for that matter) if they hang up on me. weve been together for almost 6 months and every hour i get more and more tempted to call her but i am determined to wait until she calls me. my cousin was talking to her and she said shes not gonna call me back until im ready to talk. the reason we were arguing is because she knows i get really mad when she goes to parties without even inviting me and she does it anyways but the bigger reason is because for months i try to make plans with her every weekend but she never makes time for me but she always makes time for her friends and i hate it. i gave up trying to make plans with her she should be..

i told my girlfriend since shes always turning down my plans that im not ever gonna make plans with her she has to make plans with me yet she never does instead she goes off to parties with her friends knowing i get mad and that i have nothing to do she has never cared about my feelings since we got together i hate it! anyways my question is whether i should call her or wait it out. she has to learn to respect me and know that im not gonna call her back when she hangs up and admit that im wrong like her little *****.

it is now thursday and i still have not spoken to my girlfriend. i miss her so damn much but i am determined to win this and wait for her to call me. the problem is she feels the exact same way as me. she believes that i am wrong and she is right therefore she thinks i should call her and tell her im wrong but thats not whats going to happen. if any of you care, this happened between us before we got into a huge argument and we didnt talk for two days. i got really sick and i told her friend who told her and she called me worried and came to my house that day and what we argued about didnt matter anymore. for the first time in my life, i wish i was sick....

Answer 1

Write her a letter. Then put it away for a little while and do something else. Then re-read the letter. If you don't think you'll regret it, mail it to her. Or hand deliver it with a bunch of flowers.

You could email as well, but there's less of a guarantee that you know she'll get it.

Frame things in terms of how you are feeling. Don't put the blame on her, it'll just make her defensive.

Say things like, "when you don't have time for me on weekends, I feel lonely" (or angry, or hurt, or whatever).

Maybe she doesn't know how to hang out with you. Maybe she wants to break-up but can't just say it because she's afraid of hurting you or afraid of a confrontation. Maybe she has really demanding friends.

Try to get the whole story from her by telling her how you feel.

Answer 2

You know what, girls are fussy and you need to sometimes go out of the way and tell her. Why don't you call her once agaiin and when you get together - talk about this issue. Tell her how it feels when she does this and why is it so that she goes off to parties without you? There must be a reason for her to do so, try to find out. Do you know that she loves you too? What does your heart say. Always communicate and hope you both get back together because love is the best thing in this world. Being a girl is not easy with so many harmonal changes happening inside, the mind sometimes does not allow us to think straight. I am a mother of 2 kids and I get mad at them at times for very small things, so keep this in mind and be a bit kind. All the best.

Answer 3

obviously the relationship is a game; to the both of you. if you really cared as much as you do, you wouldn't allow so much time to go by because you're right and you're trying to win the argument. a relationship is nothing without communication; something you guys obviously do not have right now. if you really want to save the relationship, you guys need to call a truce. agree to disagree. and move on from there.

the fact that she would rather spend time with her friends than with you is a problem that you guys must address as well. there is nothing wrong with her wanting to chill with her friends. do you have any boys you can chill with?? you need to level the playing field. right now, it sounds as if she does whatever and you just get mad. no good. it sounds to me as if she doesn't want a relationship right now. if she isn't even putting an effort into involving you into her life, that's a huge red flag. have you ever asked her why you can't go to these parties with her? the fact that she's hiding a part of her life from you is also a clue that you guys are on different pages. bottom line, you guys need to have a heart to heart. one where you hear her out and vice versa. and if that can't be accomplished, maybe it's about time to let go and move on.

Answer 4

Robin c, you are doing a great job. If your girlfriend knows that doing a specific thing gets you angry, she should avoid doing that specific thing to show respect... You don't sound controling to me, and disliking your woman to go to parties with friends is not considered controling... Many of our girlfriends get involved with other guys at parties and were boost by their friends influences. So, I agree with you about not liking your woman to go to parties, especially if she has never once invited you...

Please note that you MUST also trust your partner, and also allow her to spend times with other people and not with you all the time.

Give her a call. That's what we men do, be the brave one to call... We're not women, so call her and talk to her. If she doesn't want to talk, then hang up. Call again in the morning, even give her a personal visit. If she still refuses, then you know what you have to do; you'll have to stop calling her completely and let she misses you...

Answer 5

It seems she is pretty much still mad at you,obviously calling doesn't help.So I advise you to switch to be old-fashioned, and write her a sweet love letter. Apologise and admit where u were wrong. Tell her again how much she means to you, and if u promise to change your wrongs, then write your promise down to her. Suggest a future date where you expect her to make a decision about getting together back on track or simply to tell you straight away if she wants to end it, so you don't waste time waiting. I know love hurts, but sometime it ends.
Good Luck!

Answer 6

i think you should call again and explain to her how you feel calmly so that it wont lead to another arguement. but if she hangs up on you and is not trying to hear you out then you should just fall back a little bit. like dont call her and do what you can to keep busy and keep your mind off of her. if she did make more time to you i could understand her not inviting you to parties with her because girls sometimes just feel uncomfortable having thier bf there.. but since she spends more time with her girls.. it just seems like she is not putting as much into this relationship. and if she continues to act like this.. you should move on

Answer 7

this is a tough one...i really feel you when you say that you dont wanna call her back but one yall has to be the bigger person. im guessing it is you... i always tell people communication is the key! call her.... if she wont pick up the phone, drop by... if she wont answer the door... then you did your part... and the next decision is up to you.... all im sayin is you cant grow is a relationship if you know you are hurting someone and continue to do it!!
but to answer your question try to call her and see what the deal is

Answer 8

It's clear your girlfriend doesn't want a relationship with you, certainly not one that involves being with you all the time at least. She likes her time with her friends, and that is ok too but you need to get used to the idea that you are more interested in a steady relationship than she is right now.

Answer 9

she isn't going to call you i think the reson she hung up on you is because you were hostile when you called her what you need to do is be gentle about it dont get defencive or hostile with her first of all apologize to her tell her your sorry if you sounded hostile but you are upset because you feel that you arent spending enough time with her and you think that maybe you two should do more together and no matter what she says don't get hostile with her or i garuntee its over beetween you two

Answer 10

Let go of your pride, and just call her. All you're really doing is causing yourself misery. If you're too proud to make the call then move on. Start going out, have fun, live, let her see that she doesn't control your life. Althoug, it does seem that you would be better off without her if she's as careless about your feelings and efforts as you make her out to be.