I have 3 close friends & a couple of aquaintances who recently had babies. None of the pregnancies were planned. They were all "accidents". None of them are married. In fact, a few of their boyfriends didn't propose until after they got pregnant! All have started asking me when I'm going to have a baby. I am single! I have no intentions of having a baby at this point in my life & I'm sick of them always asking me that question. They've even said "we'll have to find you a man". Like I have no life because I'm single & childless. It's not like their's were planned. It happened & now they've adjusted their lives but they make it seem like it's so wonderful & anyone who doesn't have a baby is missing out on something. I'm starting to feel like they've formed their own little group & I won't be part of it until I have a baby too. Has anyone else had this happen? If so, did you open up to your friends about how you feel? Any suggestions on what I should say when they bring up the subject?
2007-02-19 15:04:55 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I really appreciate all of your answers.
Thanks!
2007-02-19 15:16:02 · update #1
You may be wise to find new friends. You've obviously got different standards than they have (and different goals). You are smart. Accidents happen but purposely not using birth control and allowing yourself to get pregnant is not an accident, right?
Anyway, in the meantime, just tell them what you told us.... that you have no intention of walking the same route they chose to take and you are not desperate for a man and, "NO Thanks,... I don't want tied down with kids just yet.... want to keep my options open"
They are probably just jealous of your freedom.
2007-02-19 15:12:11 · answer #1 · answered by Yinzer from Sixburgh 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
properly, feels like you have become guilted into infant-sitting. i'm assuming that you're associates with different mom and father. it is honestly no longer out-of-line or rude to communicate the problem with the mummy and father and ask that the children at minimum call and make certain that is okay in the previous coming over. because you've already got a fence on the sources, it feels like the mummy and father will be favoring no longer in trouble-free terms the 'free' infant-sitting, yet also the protection of the children no longer 'operating off'. Like another reported, clarify to the mummy and father that your 'infant-sitting' facilities are not any further going to be free. And stand agency at the same time as it is composed of your human being social existence. it is your position, and also you need to experience smooth to have travelers over whenever you want. The very last decision, and that i advise very last decision, is elementary: large canines, large CHAIN. basically kidding. Or am I...
2016-12-04 09:54:13 · answer #2 · answered by Erika 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It was the other way round for me. I had the baby and not my friends. My suggestion to you would be to still remain friends with this group but start to find some single friends or even childless couples. Whatever you choose. And your right when you say they think your missing out on something because they think you do. They have this new little baby and that is the only thing they see. It's not their fault just like this isn't yours. I wouldn't make a big deal about it to them. Just smile and laugh it off when they say things to annoy you. This could very well be you someday and you just might realise exactly what they are talking about.
2007-02-19 15:11:56 · answer #3 · answered by biancajh 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Your friends priorities are out of order. Why would you want to be a part of 'this group'? Sounds like you are the only one with any sense! Count your lucky stars and find some new mature friends. If you choose to continue with them then be honest. They will probably end up envious of you! Good luck.
2007-02-19 15:09:43 · answer #4 · answered by daffodil 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow talk about peer pressure. take a stand for yourself. you dont need to explain anything to them. if they are your real friends they already know your life plan. children just arent in it for you right now. if being part of their little group means you have to have a baby, well....your intelligent enough to figure out the rest...nuff said.
2007-02-19 15:11:01 · answer #5 · answered by zsaffireblue2003 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have never really wanted children but have nothing against kids either. I look at my friends and relatives that have kids and they have aged much more than I have. Tell them to mind their own business and you are happy the way you are.
2007-02-19 15:08:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell them babies cost money, lots and lots of money. Tell them you will have a baby as they suggest but only if they agree to support it and you.
2007-02-19 15:42:07 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My boy was a wild one, I use to lend him out to young couples as a form of birth control.
2007-02-19 15:07:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have had this question soooo often... in end I just made a joke of it
I would say I had one, sold it on ebay..made millions, then gambled it away in night of extravagance.
..Perhaps they are envious of your single no strings lifestyle.. ;)
2007-02-19 15:10:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
all my friends are pregant right now .... they all keep telling me to have a baby too... i dont want kids so i just tell them how it is... im not having kids... be straight with them
2007-02-19 15:09:05 · answer #10 · answered by bilinda_82 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋