tips on calming down after a huge fight?

Question

that don't involve drugs

Answer 1

Take a deep breath, it helps relax you.

Answer 2

Deep breathing is the quickest way to lower heart rate and blood pressure, which is good, but if you're still angry (which is normal), try "burning it off" with exercise! I used to run really fast or if REALLY angry, first run, then try whacking stuff (not people) with a stick or baseball bat. It really gets out the anger and then you can calm down.

If you're stuck inside, try a tennis racket on a pillow or bed, even while swearing (unless you have kids around, then go outside or you'll scare them). You can also yell things you didn't get to say during the fight, like, "Get off my back!" or "I hate you!"...etc., but they won't cause more fighting if the other person can't hear you (obviously).

There are several exercises you can do in this type of therapy called "Bioenergetics", which release different types of emotions. It's more controlled than just whacking things and gives you a rehearsed way to get out your anger so it doesn't stay bottled up OR explode in the wrong way. I've done it many times and it REALLY WORKS (I've had LOTS of anger to vent! :D )
Check out the site below.

Another good idea after a huge fight is to AVOID the person or persons in question for awhile, 'til you're all calmed down. That way the fight won't start up again and possibly escalate into physical violence. It happens to the best of people! Good luck with your anger management...and props for asking how to deal w/it, when most people do NOT!

Answer 3

I just took leave of absence from a graduate program in mental health. We actually covered this topic.

1st - Do not punch walls, stomp, punch anything (not even a punching bag) etc... Any kind of motion that is stopped, were you can't follow through only makes the body more angry. Instead use circular motions. Good circular motions include swimming and riding a bike

2nd - Listen to music. Music of your taste is great, doesn't have to be classical. Just listen to the calmest music in your taste preference. Music has healing qualities. It also helps someone change their mood.

3rd - Use comforting motions. If you notice that when your nervous you typically rub your hands together, then purposely do this. It'll help you calm down. Also anything to do with your feet like rubbing them with your hands or calming rubbing them against the carpet. It helps ground you and it helps you feel better.

4th - Notice your body. Notice if one side of your body is tense. Take methods to help these parts of your body relax.

5th - Use the physical environment to your benefit. For example: If you notice that you are feeling insecure or vulnerable then place something in front of you, any physical object such as a chair. This will act as your guard. While that is acting as your guard you may notice you don't have to do it yourself and will be able to use your mind to focus on other things such as calming down.

6th - Use breathing exercises or relaxation exercises. Breathing - notice your breath. Inhale for 4 seconds, hold 2 seconds, exhale 4 seconds, hold 2 seconds, etc... Breath from your nose. Air should come from your stomach. Place a hand on your stomach. When you breath in your stomach should fill up with air and poke out, when you exhale it should come in. Often when we are angry we do the opposite. Relaxation - Sit or lay down in a comfortable position. Relax your muscles one by one. Start at your toes, tense them up/flex them and then release. Move slowly all the way up your body.

These things work anytime your angry. Maybe try using them before you fight?

Answer 4

A list:

1: Herbal Tea.

2: Something that calms you down (varies between individuals... surely you knew that!)

3: REAL Cacao tea (unprocessed cacao nibs ground in coffee grinder, twisted into coffee filter and soaked as a tea bag)

4: Cold food or beverages

5: A warm shower

6: Playing with pets, walking/exercising pets, etc.

7: Just about anything that can calm you down.

Answer 5

Well to ensure yourself you will do good, practice a few times to get confident. Before the routine don't think about. I'm serious, i have band tests every week where you play in front of the class alone where people stare. & last year for a concert I had to do a solo in front of the school. What you do is get a song stuck in your head or think about something completely not about it. If you think you'll mess up than most likely you'll have an increased chance of messing up, so have confidence you won't.

Answer 6

You might want to try some meditation, listening to some very soothing nature sounds, (you can get a CD at Target, WalMart or other stores of this nature). Breathe deeply, visualize white light coming into you from the top of your head, and going throughout your body. When your body is filled with the white light, visualize it pushing out black or negative energy, imagine yourself at peace in a garden. Ask a guru, (your teacher in the garden) what you were meant to learn from this experience and wait for the answer.

Just remember, if you are stuck in your emotions, then you need to THINK about what is going on. If you think, you can't feel, your mind can only deal with one thing at a time, so thinking about what you are learning pulls you out of the physical sensations of anger and rage and allows you to calmly and rationally think about the situation. My daughter does this frequently and when she calls me, as she always does, I tell her to "GET OUT OF THE BOX" meaning, she needs to stop trying to think with her emotions and start thinking with her brain. As soon as she does, an answer always comes to her. She's very smart, just like you are. You just have to get out of your way so that you can hear your heart speak.

Hope you learn alot my friend. Best of luck to you.

Answer 7

Hard physical exercise (running, swimming, whatever works for you), an endorphin release is the best way to get past feelings of anger and frustration and get things back into perspective.

Answer 8

Do five minutes of deep breathing. It reduces stress and calms you down significantly.

Answer 9

Take a walk, look around and let your mind wander about what you see. The combination of exercise and distraction should help.

Answer 10

Pot