My sister who is only 15, made a mistake and now she thinks she is pregnant, its four months in roughly and she doesn't want to give birth to the child. She wants an abortion. Trouble is she is under 16 so a parents permission is needed, but our parents are proud, very proud catholics. She's worried about them making her keep it or kicking her out of the house at 16. She also doesn't want her boyfriend getting in trouble because they seem very much in love but he is two years older than her (17).
What options are available to her?
She really need advice because she's thinking of running away and I know that won't solve anything.
2007-02-19 08:19:37 · 53 answers · asked by The Man 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
She is too far along to have an abortion. That is no longer an option for her.
Her choices are: Have the baby and raise it. Or have the baby and give it up for adoption.
She must tell your parents immediately and get to a doctor. Risking the baby's health just so she won't get in trouble is not the answer! Your parents will find out sooner or later. Your sister needs to see a doctor.
2007-02-19 08:24:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 5⤋
This is a tricky one. There are many organisations that she can talk to. I have linked one below. Firstly she needs to get a test, seen as you have put she thinks and not that she is pregnant. All this worry could be for nothing as adolescents do have irregular periods. Once she definately knows then she needs to get moving. If she supects that she is 16 weeks pregnant she still has eight weeks. You can have a termination up to 24 weeks with the consent of two doctors although most hospitals and clinics will not carry out a termination after 18 weeks.
I would suggest talking to her local family planning clinic as this will be confidential. I also believe that your parents need to know. They will be far more supportive than both of you think. I'm sure they would be more disappointed if your sister went behind their backs rather than talking to them about what is happening. Make sure that she knows running away is not the answer. She will be without any support and the problem will not go away.
Good luck and I'm sure everything will work out.
2007-02-22 06:17:48 · answer #2 · answered by niccog26 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ab abortion is not the answer eaither,i think she id afriad of giving birth ..which is only natural at any age..i feel perhaps the boyfriend is older therefore should bring this up with his parents..if your parents kicked her out of the house then there is not a lot of love there,if they are purley based thier judgment on thier reputation.We all make mistakes..i had an abortion at 16..and it was emontionaly heart breaking,it is not an easy option at all.Sound to me like they both need a lot of support.Four months into pregnancy is quite advanced and the baby is fully formed now..an abortion at this stage would mean being induced and still giving birth to a dead baby..i ahve been through it and i cannot tell you how i wish i had not,my partener at the time was not very supportive..i am 27 now and have two lovely children..but i still cry at times about this all these years later.Running away is not going to help,atho it is a natural human response..she needs to be onest with her parents,and his parents need to know.There is lots of support out there..your local clinic should be able to give your sister and her boyfriend plenty of support and advice,perhaps he can get some work and put money away..find a place to rent and make a go of it..she is only 15 but will soon grow up once the baby is born..we cannot look at everything in a negative light..your parents will need to be accepting,and loving..na d try to help where they can..but please tell your sister an abortion is by no mean an easy way out,giving birth is not a terrible thing..no one has to have a painful birth these days with the pain relief we,ve got now.I feel for you and your sister..but her boyfriend must take action..this will be a testing time for thier love ..he needs to look after her and do what is right.
thinking of you..take care..let me know how things go...if you want futher support i am here via e-mail.
2007-02-20 08:54:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ok you have had a lot of advice about this but it is too much for you or youre sister to deal with alone. I was in a similar situation but a little older, talk to your parents either on your own or with someone you can trust. they will be disapointed but it is only because they want you to do well in life and although you meight feel like it, its not the end of the world. They love you both and will be there for you, my parents are strict catholics as well and they were brilliant and very supportive. Please tell her that the worst thing to do is run away it is a very cruel world out there and you need all the help you can get. Good luck and take care.
2007-02-21 00:22:06 · answer #4 · answered by Davaneve 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Right, well if it's been 4 months then she really needs to go see her doctor. If you're in the UK then the doctor will probably keep it private unless he feels there is a real reason to let your parents know. She doesn't have long until the abortion will become illegal, at 24 weeks (again, in the UK) abortions are considered murder. If she's 4 months pregnant that's around 16 weeks, there's normally a waiting period for an abortion. Get to the doctor or family planning clinic soon.
And next time, tell her to use a condom.
2007-02-19 08:27:16 · answer #5 · answered by mad_caesar 3 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Has your sister done a pregnancy test you said she THINKS she may be pregnant, get her a test and cross the next hurdle one you are definitely sure. If she is pregnant get it confirmed by the doctor. You need to stick by her, how about you talking to your parents first, they will go mad but then they will calm down. Also there is 2 involved the boyfriend should face up to responsibility too.
First of though like I said do a pregnancy test, if she isn't take her to the family planning clinic and put her on the pill, Catholics or not she should learn and your parents don't need to know she is on the pill.
Good luck
2007-02-21 04:31:04 · answer #6 · answered by Danielle P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Killing her unborn child is not a moral option. At four months, her baby looks and acts like a tiny infant. He can get the hiccups, smile, frown, urinate, grasp an object placed in his palm, suck his thumb, sleep, awaken--and feel pain. Abortion would be very dangerous for your sister as well. Please show her this information, and encourage her to do the right thing and let her baby live:
Photos and Video of Abortions:
http://www.cbrinfo.org/Resources/pictures_3.html
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-4-video.html
Information on All Aspects of Abortion:
http://Abort73.com
Photos and Facts About Prenatal Development:
http://www.justthefacts.org/clar.asp
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-2-prenatal.html
http://www.studentsforlife.uct.ac.za/foetal%20dev%20photos.html
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/in_pictures/3847319.stm
http://www.lifeissues.org/ultrasound/11weeks.htm
Abortion Stories:
http://abortiontv.com/Words/truestoriesfrom-mothers.htm
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-G-2-testimony.html
http://www.teenbreaks.com/abortion/girlswhoaborted.cfm
Abortion Risks:
http://afterabortion.info/complic.html
http://www.abortionfacts.com/reardon/effect_of_abortion.asp
http://www.teenbreaks.com/abortion/complicationsgirls.cfm
Abortion Deaths:
http://www.lifedynamics.com/Pro-life_Group/Pro-choice_Women
http://www.afterabortion.info/news/abortiondeaths.html
Free, Confidential Pregnancy Help (including referrals for financial, medical, legal, and housing assistance; free pregnancy tests and ultrasounds; free maternity and baby supplies; pregnancy, parenting, and adoption information; counseling and emotional support):
http://www.optionline.org/advantage.asp
http://www.heartbeatinternational.org/worldwide_directory.asp
Support for Pregnant Teens:
http://standupgirl.com/site/index.php
Advice on Telling Parents About a Pregnancy:
http://lifehouse.glorifyjesus.com/questions/pregnancy/tellingparents.html
Your parents can't make your sister keep her baby. If she would like to give her child up for adoption, she can. It's very unlikely that they would actually kick her out of the house. Yes, they will be upset, but they love her and will most likely support her in the end. She doesn't need to feel sorry for her boyfriend, either. He made the choice to have sex with her, knowing a baby could result. Your sister is a mother now, and her first responsibility is to her baby, not to her parents or boyfriend. She needs to be strong and do the right thing. Yes, it will be hard, but she'll just have to get through it. Her worries do not justify killing an innocent child.
2007-02-19 13:32:52 · answer #7 · answered by Just the Facts 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
forget approximately with reference to the RC church - forget approximately approximately what others are doing, no count if we are forward or at the back of them - forget approximately approximately no count if being allowed holiday overseas to do some thing makes some thing makes it ok overseas or ok right here - forget approximately with reference to the bully girls and boys on the two sides of the communicate. If a foetus isn't a individual then it is going to be very nicely to abort it, do scientific study on it, use it for elegance study, or maybe devour it. If a foetus IS a individual then definitely you are able to only kill it in an identical circumstances which you will kill any harmless individual - subsequently such because of the fact the existence of the mummy being in possibility, and so on. in case you do no longer know no count if a foetus is or isn't a individual then definitely you're able to err on the component of warning and anticipate that that's. while utilising on a depressing evening you're meant to decelerate and supply up in case you notice a shape that must be a individual mendacity on the line, no longer plough on forward considering the fact which you weren't advantageous. yet particular eire will at last legalise abortion because of the fact many idiots only prefer to maintain up with those overseas or drag us into 2010, 2020, or 2050 or regardless of 300 and sixty 5 days that's going to be while that is executed, incredibly than legalise it because of the fact they have concluded that foetuses are actually not human and that as a result that is positive. of direction i do no longer advise all people could carry their breath waiting....
2016-11-23 19:11:22 · answer #8 · answered by malan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so ANGRY at everyone being so judgemental! How dare you! This isn't about how you feel about abortion at all. And I'm sick of people spouting their self righteous religion.
Some of the sensible, impartial and practical answers are correct however, it is too late for an abortion and many doctors will not perform one that far along. She will have to carry the foetus to term unless she miscarries. If she cannot look after the child then she will have to give it up to the state. It will be heartbraking, much more heartbreaking than an abortion in my opinion, but it is an option and I for one think that if she makes that decision then she is a brave and responsible person. There are too many people that cannot look after children properly and they grow up to be complete disasters. At least this will be giving it a good start and, like somebidy said before, there are many childless couples desperate for a baby to adopt. Good on her if she decides to look after the little one as well, it will be hard and I couldn't have done it. Either way, if your parents love their religion more than her, she's going to need you more than ever.
Stick by her.
2007-02-20 01:53:12 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Okay.16 weeks is doable (at 24-28 and beyond is when she would have problems). Talk to a planned parenthood worker. (1-800-230-plan OR www.plannedparenthood.org)
It took a long time for her to make this decision so do not go to any pregnancy help centers. They will scare her and make her feel bad about wanting an abortion (I know from personal experience).
She will have to fill out a Waiver of Parental Notification if she does not want the parents to know about the abortion. Since they are Catholic, only you all know how they will react and whether or not it will cause her harm.
Running away will not help! Be there for her. If she shows that she is (1) mature enough to make her own decisions AND IS FAMILIAR WITH THE ABORTION PROCESS, (2) if it is not in her best interest, (3) lead to physical or emotional abuse, (4) of lead to sexual abuse, THEN the court could waive parental notification. She has to meet at least one of those possibilities in the eyes of the court
She will need a "guardian" (Adult friend, Aunt, or court-appointed lawyer) to be with her.
GOOD LUCK!
PS- every state is different and that is why you are getting a lot of different answers.
2007-02-19 09:44:09 · answer #10 · answered by Myra G 5 · 2⤊ 3⤋
Women over 16 years do not need their parents' consent to have an abortion. If you are under 16, you normally need your parents' consent. However, the law does say that a girl under 16 can give consent to her own treatment if her doctor considers her to be mature enough to make the decision. But very few doctors are prepared to give medical treatment under these circumstances.
She might want to talk to someone about these people are great.
Women’s Health Concern has nurse counsellors available to answer your health questions and concerns.
They are available Monday and Tuesday from 10.00am to 2.00pm and Wednesday, Thursday and Friday from 10.00am to 1.00pm
Contact them by calling 0845 123 2319 (local rates).
Their website is www.womens-health-concern.org.
Hope everything works out for your sister
2007-02-19 08:24:58 · answer #11 · answered by Jess 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋