Like when you explain something, and say "To ... means to ask someone if THEY want to...".
Or, can I say "I have to ask a person if THEY want..."?
I'm asking this because it sounds funny to say "they" when you're talking about just one person.
I always said him/her instead of they, but my English isn't so good.
Could you please explain to me, and give examples? Thank you very much!!
2007-02-19 05:37:56 · 10 answers · asked by Chris 5 in Education & Reference ➔ Words & Wordplay
for bruhaha> I said I use both "he" and "she" at the same time, so no one's confused.
2007-02-19 08:41:33 · update #1
Sorry, but their is NOT a clear "rule" that you must use "he" in these cases. "They" has been used in this way, and by the best of writers, for just as long!
In recent times many have tried to claim that is is illogical and wrong to use "they"/"their" to refer to one unknown ("generic") person.
Yes, it may sound "funny" to say "they when referring to one person. But it is no more illogical of funny-sounding than using "he" to speak about someone who may, in fact, be feminine!
Some think that "they" may be confusing. But if the sentence already indicates that you are speaking about individuals, there is no reason for anyone to be confused.
In fact, "he" can confuse!. And that might be a good test for deciding which to use. If using "he"/"his"/"him" will, in a specific sentence, probably lead people to THINK that you're speaking of males only, but you don't want to do that, try to use "they" instead.
Support: Since the 1300s (Middle English), MANY of the finest authors have used a generic "they"/"their". In fact, this is just about the same time as the generic use of the masculine "he"/"him"/"his"!
For the history, a list of such authors and many examples (esp. from Jane Austen, about whom the page was written), as well as material from the Oxford English Dictionary, see the sections of the article "Jane Austen and other famous authors violate what everyone learned in their English class" beginning with:
http://www.crossmyt.com/hc/linghebr/austheir.html#X1a
I suggest that you use whatever works best in the specific situation. Sometimes it's a good idea, if you can, to make the whole statement PLURAL ("PEOPLE don't always know what's best for THEM.") so that you don't have the problem of gender (he / she) OR number (singular vs. plural). Sometimes "you"/"your" (which doesn't distinguish gender OR number) will make sense.
2007-02-19 07:45:14 · answer #1 · answered by bruhaha 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is not such an easy question ... to avoid "they" ... often in regular everyday speech we do not avoid it ... in writing it is possible to rephrase the statement to avoid the problem altogether .... speaking is ok too, but many of us do not speak well...I am sorry to say
Examples ~~~~ let' see
"I asked the two girls which one of them wanted the box of sandalwood." ~~~~ in this case, to use "them" is ok because you have indicated that there are two girls...
"I asked the person at the end of the line if he would ...."
That means you know if it is a man or woman
"I have to ask a person if they want ...." can be rephrased
as "I must (better usage than 'have to') ask someone if a trip downtown would be ....." ....... it is a step up in the skill in handling the language ... you have changed from the present tense into subjunctive and avoided using the verb form "to go ..." which you indicated was unacceptable ...
it will all come one day ... don't worry ... I did read all the notes here above my entry and am thrilled to see that I may relax!!!
hoping this is helpful
Peace & Love
*****************
2007-02-19 05:54:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
They or them are used when speaking about 2 or more people as in I want to ask my friends if THEY want to to go to the movies.I will ask THEM when I get home. Context is very important to how you use nouns( names) and pronouns(she,he,they, them) Let's say you bought something at a store and you have questions regarding it, you would say something like I have to call the store and ask THEM... or you can say I have to ask someone if THEY...
2007-02-19 06:22:19 · answer #3 · answered by Georgewasmyfavorite 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's just english Chris, it has a lot of stupid rules and exceptions and it doesn't make sense all the time. As for your question, you could say it both ways, with him/her or they.
2007-02-19 05:42:13 · answer #4 · answered by Mandy 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Apparently, Chris, your English is better than many others'. You are correct in your assumption that it should always be "him/her", not "they" when referring to one person. However, it has become accepted in the vernacular to use "they" even when referring to one person. So while it is true that you should say, "I need to ask someone if he or she can help me," it has become common practice to say "...if they can help me."
2007-02-19 05:43:28 · answer #5 · answered by goodasisaacs 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I have to ask her if she wants.... or, I have to ask him if he wants... And according to your question, it seems as if your english is fine. Keep striving for knowledge and you'll never have to worry.
2007-02-19 05:48:33 · answer #6 · answered by Nick C 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Using "they" in the singular is wrong, but people use it because the proper form ("he") is frowned upon by some.
Correct: "Each of you should take his shoes to the next room."
Politically Correct: "Each of you should take their shoes to the next room."
But it's not historically gramatically correct.
2007-02-19 05:42:52 · answer #7 · answered by Meg W 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
YOU are correct. Unfortunately, in American speech, people are using 'they' because it is easier then sayng the three words...him or her. And through usage, it has become almost acceptible.
2007-02-19 05:40:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I know what you mean.
It is perfectly acceptable to say "they" and "their" instead of "he or she" or "his or her". Some people prefer not to, but I think it's rather cumbersome saying "he or she" and "his or her" all the time.
.
2007-02-19 16:19:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
nope... good question though....
you have to use him or her or him/her or her/him ...
i wondered about the same thing in the past...
you can say "one" but that's more impersonal... and will sound weired in certain context...
"you can ask one to help you with your taxes"
2007-02-19 05:45:14 · answer #10 · answered by Ales M 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋