How do I tell if my girlfriend is ready for sex? I am starting to annoy her that I ask her to have sex with me every once per week in my opinion. She wanted to break up with me... I don't want to continue pushing the subject with her anymore. We have been together for almost 6 years now. We are both 24.
2007-02-19 03:47:46 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
That sounds kind of strange. Maybe this is a sign that she's a lesbian, or maybe she doen't want to be in the relationship anymore. I don't think you should have to ask for sex. Sex is an important part of a relationship and if it's not working then maybe you guys should see other people.
2007-02-19 05:12:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe she's waiting for marriage. If you guys are commited why not take the next step? You have already had a long term committment and she may have her values. Ask yourself if you are ready for another commitment. If she has waited six years then maybe she doesn't think you will ever marry her. I can not tell you for sure, but my hubby and I waited 2 years before we got married and just in that time I thought he wasn't serious. I was a virgin and would not have sex until I knew we were going to be married. I wasn't about to let him just get sex without a wedding ring. It was the best thing we ever did. She probably feels that you care about sex and not a true commitment. :) It's us women for you. And there can be many other reasons but from what I have seen those are the main ones. I think that is good though. You know she will be faithful and even though it is hard on the guy, believe it or not it is just as hard for the women. Men aren't the only ones with a sex drive. If you love her, you will find out her reasoning. She may feel like she is not getting any younger.
Also, as odd as this sounds, because he waited until we were married and he knew how hard it was for both of us the sex is off the charts. Also, it was because I knew he cared enough about wanting to wait. I know that waiting is not an option for some, but for me it showed me it wasn't just about sex. We have been married for nearly 4 1/2 years now and are having our first child. I am 24 as well and my hubby is 30 so he was 23 when we got together.
16 weeks and 4 days pregnant.
2007-02-19 11:58:18 · answer #2 · answered by Kelly s 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She will tell you when she is ready. You can't make that decison for her. I would suggest having a serious talk with her about why she isn't. Don't try to persude her to do it, just ask for facts and ask if there is anything you can do to help her.
If she is scared of pregnancy, education and birth control options can help her in that aspect. If it's for religious reasons, you may be out of luck because relgion is personal and rigid. If she feels that you are pressuring her too much, explain that you are feeling the need to bring the reltionship to the sexual level and you are unsure of the signs.
Basically, I would put the ball in her court. Ask her what you need to do, and tell her to be unfront and vocal about the right time. Tell her you love her no matter if she does or doesn't, but she needs to keep you posted and let you know there is sex in sight somewhere and give a goal to work towards.
Oh, and DON'T get married just to have sex... Marriage is a huge thing, and committing to that just to get some sex is the worst idea in the world. If she says she is waiting till she is married, think long and hard about every aspect before you decide to do it. (I personally would never marry anyone who wouldn't let me have sex with them first.... I don't buy a car without test driving! )
2007-02-19 12:00:29 · answer #3 · answered by harpseal1998 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, the first step is not just "asking" for sex, but discussing the idea of sex with her. You can ask why she does not want to and you could try to reach a middle ground. She may also have some fears in relation to sex (this is perfectly normal, sex is such a taboo and so demonized that it becomes a scary topic), and you should address these fears. There should also be a certain amount of exploration and preliminaries prior to the sexual relations. It would give her time to get used to the idea of sex.
Also, if its a question of how often you do it, well, if its not good for her, she wont want it. Sex is a lot less scary when its fun.
2007-02-19 11:59:26 · answer #4 · answered by ryushinigami 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is up to her on whether she is ready for sex or not, there is no visual sign to tell. And asking anyone the same question every week would annoy them. You may need to sit down and have a good long talk to find out what is the reasons she has for not having sex with you. You may have bigger problem than just not having sex.
2007-02-19 11:59:20 · answer #5 · answered by zinistir 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Obviously you two are not on the same page with this whole thing. You need to have a discussion, if you haven't already, about why she is waiting. Is she waiting til marriage? If so, are you going to marry her? Is she just unsure still? You need to have a serious discussion to UNDERSTAND where she is coming from. Once you understand, there won't be a need to keep asking her over and over. She will let you know when she is ready, and until then you are just going to have to wait, or move on.
2007-02-19 11:57:02 · answer #6 · answered by EllisFan 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There are lots of reasons why someone isn't ready to have sex. She could be waiting for marriage, the right moment, she could have been sexually abused and is still in need of some healing.
You need to sit down and seriously discuss this with her.
But here's the biggest sign for whether or not your girlfriend is ready to have sex with you. If she isn't even comfortable or ready to discuss it with you, she definitely isn't ready to have sex with you.
2007-02-19 12:10:45 · answer #7 · answered by hourglasspixie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You've been together for 6 years, your both 24, and you haven't had sex yet? What's holding her back? Does she want to wait until marriage? Why haven't you married her?
Seems very strange that you haven't had sex yet
2007-02-19 11:52:18 · answer #8 · answered by naenae0011 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Maybe before you ask her to have sex you should ask her to marry you. That sounds harsh but if you are willing to have the commitment of sex you SHOULD be married to her. I mean, if you have been together for 6 years you should know if you are in love with her or not. If you think you are ready to have sex with her than you should be 100% sure you want to marry her. That is all there is to it.
2007-02-19 11:54:38 · answer #9 · answered by Silent Murder 1 · 2⤊ 2⤋
So she's a virgin? Is she waiting for marriage? I would just sit and talk about the subject and find out why she doesn't think she's ready for it. Make dinner or take her to dinner one night and discuss it.
2007-02-19 11:51:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋