Does marriage cause more problems that it solves?

Question

From all the Q's and A's I read on these forums, It looks to me like it causes way too many problems.

At least in my marriage to my husband, we do not keep any secrets and are willing to talk about the dirtiest of fantasies.

Answer 1

kool for you but then that doesnt say you dont have problems.
My experience is that it does cause more problems than it solves.........Every day

Answer 2

Being married doesn't cause problems. You have to work at it. Marriage is just like anything else in this world, you put forth effort and patience, you can get through it. But if you think that it will work out on it own...well keep dreamin. Alot of people rushes into marriage which is a big mistake. WHy rush? Take your time and enjoy each other and get to know each other. Even when you do decide to get married, you really don't know much about each other. You learn more about a person once you start living together especially with the sleepin habits, cleaning habits, etc. I have flaws and so does my husband but we get through them day after day.

In closing, I will say marriage is a wonderful blessing but some people need to realize that it is not all about having a wedding. When you take those vows, they need to be for real. No joke!

Answer 3

Honey, sounds to me like you haven't been married that long!

As the years go by, many challenges will face you. Money, mortgages, children, career changes, family, moving, staying. You have no idea. With all the changes comes increased stress. Decisions and compromises must be made, often it's the woman who ends up with the greatest burden when it comes to children, the home, being a wife and having a career.

As I said many outside factors which you can't possibly fathom at this time will enter your lifes...even ill health which could change much...children can complicate life and get in the way of normal routines which you now take for granted.

You can turn into the infamous "nag"...don't think you're immune...*S*

I'm just saying that a lot of things can change what you have in the early years of marriage, but if you can weather the storms and if it all stems from love and you work it all out, you'll stay together.

Sadly most people don't have the staying power and refuse to make the sacrifices it takes to see it through.

Answer 4

Marriage either brings out the best in people, or the worst in them. A couple that had a firm foundation before marriage will be able to weather the storms after marriage. A marriage that was not built on a solid ground will fall apart at the seams when problems arise.

When you say, "At least in my marriage", you seem to be comparing your marriage to other couples in this forum. That's not a wise thing to do, because you don't know what the future holds. If you think you and your husband don't keep secrets, and you can talk about the filthiest fantasies, good for you. Here's hoping you'll someday rise to higher ground.

Answer 5

In a marriage, a couple should be able to talk about anything, spilling the darkest of secrets to each other. Honesty is the key to a good marriage. Problem is, people get married either too young or too early, or even sometimes(in the military) for extra pay! You shouldnt when you think you can live with someone, you should get married when you know you can't live without them.

Answer 6

You don't marry to solve any problems and if you do then you are compounding them not resolving them. Marriage doesn't create problems it is simply a joining of two energy forces. Each with their own will, views and feelings. So one must learn to compromise and respect the other.

Answer 7

Marriage is not meant to solve problems.

Answer 8

Sometimes, letting go seems like the easiest thing to do. But think about this: you've invested so much of your time and energy into another person; you've made a solemn promise; and you still know there's love, even if it's hiding underneath the surface. This website will show you how to save a marriage and avoid divorce, even if you're the only one trying https://tr.im/VtHvK

Answer 9

When selfish overgrown kids get married or produce children it causes a lot of problems. But they shouldn't be getting laid at any level.

Keeping secrets is a form of selfishness, just like the past don't count. That's code for I don't want my past to count.

Answer 10

Sometimes it just goes that way, I really think you need to know a person a lot better than you think you do, before you say 'I do.' Good for you on your marriage.