What can be done about this? I dont know why my husband doesnt want sex, he claims heis stresse, tired and whatever else. In turn I think I have developed some self esteem issues, trying to figure out what is wrong with me.
And sometimes I think he only has sex with me becuase I comlpain, and there for the sex doesnt mean anything to me.
This situation leads to others, that will eventually lead to divorce? What can be done?
2007-02-19 01:46:22 · 18 answers · asked by lalala 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well your husband is cheating on you with his hand.
He probably is selfish and takes care of his own needs by himself and doesnt care about your needs.
You need to have a frank conversation with him and make him understand what you need.
Also try being creative about sex, wear sexy outfits and be aggressive.
You get what you need girl!!
2007-02-19 01:51:00 · answer #1 · answered by jim 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Visit a marriage counselor and if your husband does not have any physical problems and still is not interested in sex anymore, perhaps he does not want to be married anymore. There can be many issues that can account for his decreased or negligible interest in sex that can range from tiredness and stress to psychological problems to overactive spiritual inclination to not feeling compatible with you. You are right, you cannot keep begging for sex and of course, your self-esteem is hurt if you are the only one trying to keep your sex life intact. Try counseling and psychiatric help first, but if that doesn't work, perhaps you will have to opt for a way out of marriage.
2007-02-19 09:55:01 · answer #2 · answered by Smriti 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing I found is a combination of two things: communication and patience. As much as I don't want to say this, sometimes you just have to stop, put your needs on hold, and give him some space. Work on making YOURSELF feel good. I know this weighs on your self-esteem, but you need to understand one thing: YOU CANNOT LET SOMEONE ELSE - even your husband - MAKE YOU FEEL BAD ABOUT YOURSELF! Quite honestly, give him a little break on the subject, and spend that time taking care of you: mani/pedi, massages, new haircut, get some new clothes. During that time, make sure you talk to him honestly and let him know you care about his feelings, that you do want him and love him, and that you understand his stress. Tell him you are giving him some time, but that you still find him desirable and attractive. Maybe if you guys stop stressing about the sex, it will come more easily to you.
2007-02-19 10:38:39 · answer #3 · answered by fossiesteele 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, he jsut told you why he doesn't want sex..
"I'm tired, stress, ect ect ect.."
You really shoulnd't take it so personally. What you need to do, is stop complaining about how you are not getting any sex, and just go for it. Nothing like a suprise "oral attack" while he's doing something really boring.
AS for your confidence issues, chuck them out the door!! You husband loves you, but its really getting miffed that you are nagging him about sex. Once you are nicer and don't complaine and whine, he'll want you more and you'll feel like a whole new woman.
If his excuses are getting old though, ask him what is making him so stressed and tired. if its work, tell him its time to a vacation and you can make sure he gets plenty of rest! (when you aren't humping him that is!!!!)
good luck!
2007-02-19 10:11:01 · answer #4 · answered by Pandora 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When I was dating my now husband. He bought a Topco sex swing for Valentines day last year. That is my suggestion, If you did, it would be day he would never forget. I experienced my first big - O, it was amazing, so I just had to marry him.
From this woman's point of view the swing we got made my butt sore. It was like sitting on a swing at the playground. It made my legs go a little numb. I guess from a man's point of view. well lets say the point of view is what counts to him :)
I have been asking about the RHW swing I seen on ebay. The RockHer World Swing looks like it is built more from the woman's point of view. Looks like this is the one we are going to get next. It just looks so comfy. I found it by doing a search for "sex swing" on ebay. I have gotten one answer to my question I have posted here that made me make up my mind to get one for sure.
Has any one Else bought the RHW Swing
A sex swing would help you guys really like the idea
2007-02-19 09:54:33 · answer #5 · answered by Just Married 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first thing to do his pray to the almighty god jesus to take control
then stop changing in front of him give your self space dont let him see you naked unless he wants sex, lock ur doors in the shower. then at night wear sexy night cloths. also start going to the gym and randomly (intentionaly) pose when he is near like pik a pencil or arch while leaning on the table anything..
another senario is low testostorone might be causing low sex drive. see a doc
2007-02-19 09:53:47 · answer #6 · answered by uncrowned ruler 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try and get him to be more open about what's going on and have a right good talk about where you two are at. If he finds this hard then try and talk to a councilor or someone professional who can point you in the right direction to get this sorted.
2007-02-19 09:51:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
hey just relax and try and talkthings thu with him, maybe a weekend break, so he isnt stressed and try and get down to the real problem, whatever you do dont nag him. I wish u luck!
2007-02-19 09:51:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
because you were having "Sex"! Try getting to know, eachother. And actually falling in Love with eachother. THEN! You can "Make Love" and that's something totally different. If it ain't for Love? It ain't for real! Respect yourself. And only execpt it in return!
2007-02-19 09:52:00 · answer #9 · answered by Goggles 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your husband and tell him how you feel, and ask him to confide in you as to what is happening. Hope things improves for you in the future.
2007-02-19 09:52:36 · answer #10 · answered by WC 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋