What are common pitfalls in marriage - how can they be avoided??

Question

I am 25 and my girlfriend is 26. I haven't popped the question yet but I seee us engaged by the end of the year and maybe married within two. To those who have been married, what problems did you face and what did you do about it? Rather learn from your mistakes than mine - lol

Answer 1

1)money
2)happiness
3)sex
4)in-laws
just make sure that you guys budget your money right because when the money is not right then nobody is happy. make sure that you keep her happy by doing what she loves to do that way she says happy with you. sex is also important because if it is not good between you two then one of you will end up cheating and we dont want that so you guys should do whatever it is that pleases each other. and last but not least the in-laws and friends. she might have some friends and family members that you dont like. the only advice i can give you on that point is to pretend you like them around them because that what i do and it works for me

Answer 2

One thing that annoys me about my husband is that he doesn't like some of my family memebers. when we were dating i knew this but he was still kind of nice to them. now that we are married he is rude and is always expressing to me that he doesnt like them. I havent been able to fix this problem yet... advice: sometimes things that annoy you a little (while u r dating) may become a bigger problem later.
He doesn't clean up after himself well not right away. For example he will eat lunch and leave his plate, soda, and ketchup on the table. Most of the time im at work during this time (he works the night shift) I'll come home and ask him to pick up his stuff and he'll say "in a minute." Then he'll either fall asleep or he'll wait until dinner to clear it off and make a new mess. advice: if u r a person who likes to keep a clean house make sure that they are the same way.
I am christian and he is agnostic. at first this did not bother me at all because i wasn't going to church all that often. now when i want to go to church he asks me "why?" advice: make sure ya'll are either the same religion or that u won't have a problem with the other religion and decide which u will practice once u have children.

there is so much more..... just take ur time and make the right decision.... talk about ur future together a lot before u take that step.... by future i mean even the little things ie laundry or what bank u'll be using. GOOD LUCK

PS There are also a lot of things i like about my husband lol

Answer 3

When your that young make sure that you have a good job your own home and not depend on others for paying your bills or even living with them, you should try not to fight about money and keep a level head about things when problems arise, you try and find a solution instead of making things worse.Marriage is a 2 way street not a 1 way don't ever forget that.Lose your single friends because they will try to talk you into things which will lead you into trouble.Hang out with married people.

Answer 4

I think one common pitfall is a failure to recognise the fact that over time a relationship will change, that it will be different from how it was in the beginning, and that this is natural, inevitable, and a good thing. I think a lot of marital problems stem from this; people equating these changes with something 'wrong' with the marriage, and wishing they could get back the relationship they had in the beginning.

Best wishes!

Answer 5

So what's your question? Surveys can spot traits, yet i've got self assurance "love is blind" is a reality, and couples decide to have self assurance that they've got here across a soul mate, that they are going to stay fortuitously ever after, and are oblivious to defects in character. for the duration of the courtship they often are on their greater powerful habit, enormously if the courtship is short. as quickly as the secret of intercourse is over, the dedication is there, human beings relax into their undesirable behaviors, the little ones arrive is while tensions start to construct if couples are no longer arranged for a clean little guy or woman of their lives. some human beings have not got something in worry-unfastened yet intercourse, then husbands needs are placed aside for the needs of the little ones, husbands ideals approximately raising little ones impact their relationship with their better halves, it expenses money to develop little ones, the financial pressures develop. religious ideals are greater actually addressed earlier marriage through fact maximum religions choose you to marry interior your faith and require premarital practise. If somebody adopts a clean faith after the marriage that would desire to be an argument. the final instructor for marital fulfillment is that if the guy's mothers and dads had an prolonged marriage, they study compromise and doing issues for the income of the marriage and family individuals. How will divorce legal experts instruct human beings approximately marriage? That cuts into their income.

Answer 6

1. Respect each other's need for privacy. Everything changes when you begin living with someone. Realize that people still need alone time.

2. Wait to have kids. Don't start immediately. You need time to be sure you have a steady, stable marriage before you start bringing children into the picture. Because, trust me, nothing will be steady or stable anymore after kids come into the picture! You need a firm foundation to handle the changes.

3. Love each other. As long as you love her like you want to be loved and treat her with the respect that she deserves (and vice versa), you will have a mutual, long-lasting love and commitment that will beat the odds.

Good luck to you. And congratulations!

Answer 7

first learning how to live with the other person,,married is a big step,.....we go into marrieed thinking the oerson we marrieed are like us, but realy they to think the same, an learn ,we not ,2th bills are a big deal, learning to give as well how to recived,. getting made an saying thing we dont mean, always think be fore you say something, word can an do hurt,,once say can not be taken back,,learn to talk to you mate,, rember you both have choises,,,before you buy something sit down an talk about it, an the big thing never let sleep fall on you when you in a fight, alway work it out,, then their haveing kids, they going to put a strain on you both,,,most men dont want to give up his wife,when kids come a long, for they feel left out, ,an the last thing rember he are she is your mate,you do not own that person

Answer 8

Become best friends. Never go to bed angry. Keep your own friends but mix it up once in awhile. Say I love you at least everyday. Hug and kiss and hold hands a lot. Dont' diss her to your friends or family. Don't keep old letters from past g-friends around. Realize that "happily ever after" is not reality. You will go through very hard times together--but always, always try your best to work it out.

Answer 9

Kids are the big change,
make SURE you spend alone time together every so often, like once a month at least for dinner so you do not drift apart and let the child come between you too much.

Answer 10

my marriage never had a problem with trust our problem was that he didn't know how to show me how much he loved me. not by buying me stuff all the time, i mean affection. lot's of hugs and kisses, a lot of communication is a must. don't hold back what you are feeling. if you want to say something then say it. how you are feeling, why you are so happy or why you are sad. Good Luck to you!!!