how do i keep it a secret?

Question

i really want to give my baby up i just am not ready am i doing a bad thing the people in my community look down on things like that like you are wicked or you dont care the thing is i do care thats why i am making this big sacrafice is it a sin will god forgive me and also i am starting to show now its becoming noticable what do i say to fam&friends that i am just getting fat they will never buy that and when i caome home without a baby what do i say the baby died i am so nervous about how i will be viewed i know i should not think about what others say but in a small island like this one my reputation can be crushed for a long time is there anyway to hide my pregnancy

i already have 3 youngest is 14months i cant handle another i am going back to school and i got a good job now i was in a nasty abusive relationship for years i am really too young to go through this again i feel good about life again i am only 24 years old now you see what i mean

Answer 1

There are still pregnancy homes for mothers if you want to go away for awhile. Also maybe you could stay with some family for a time.

Edited to add:
Hmm well that makes it hard. Obviously you can't take three other kids to a home for pregnant women.

Can you possibly stay with another family member for awhile? Probably impossible, work, etc.

Well the best thing if anyone gives you a hard time about where the baby is, lie. Tell them you had a stillborn. That'll shut them up and you are under no obligation to be polite to strangers that are not polite to you.

(And please ignore the idiots about prenatal care, and any other idiots *lol*)

Answer 2

There's not really much you can do to hide a pregnant belly unless you are a bigger girl already or you just start wearing baggy clothes so that no one can tell.. do not tell them the baby died though and lie to them about that because that will just start a bunch of other stuff.. does your family know?? If so, have you family help you.. if your family doesn't know and finds out those are people you can always count on.. tell them you are pregnant and aren't ready for the child so you are going to put it up for adoption and if they are against it because they think you won't see the child there is always open adoption which is where you still can see pictures of the kid etc etc.. so your not completely parting with the child. It's not a sin to give up your child, if your not mentally, physically, emotionally, financially.. whatever your reasoning may be to take care of a kid right now then the right thing to do is give it up for adoption. Give it to a family that you know will love and care for the child as well as if it were their own so that your child will only have the best things in life. God will not despise you or look down on you for doing the right thing.. Some people may say it is a responsibility and consequence you have to face but if your not ready, you're not ready! At least this way you are still giving the child a chance at life instead of aborting the child altogether! Best of luck to you!!!!

Answer 3

If you cant or dont want to take care of that baby that is no ones business but yours, the babys interest comes first and people are throwing their babies in the garbage and killing them now that is something for people to look down on and say that you are wicked for! Did you ever think what they will say if they knew you were having sex and not married obviously not because you will be showing and they will all know that! First of all what about all those people will they be there to take care of that baby when he/she comes home i dont think so, so the decision is yours. I am adopted and I dont know why my mother gave me up for adoption but I am happy that she didnt kill me! It doesnt have to be a secret and yes god will forgive you. He forgives for murder and that is not something that you are doing. Also what about those other people you dont know what they did in their lives and I am sure you will never know. If you think you are doing the right thing do it! You have a reputation anyway and they wont be looking at you forever someone on that island will do something more drastic then you and they will be the talk of the island. Do what makes you able to sleep at night with. Good Luck to You!

Answer 4

You could but you really need prenatal care whether you are keeping the baby or not. If you could get by with it, make an excuse to leave town for a while and take care of things there where nobody knows you. You can get all types of information on adoption through the doctor's office. I'd much rather see someone who really wants this baby have it as I know you don't, and it's not a bad thing because there are loving people out there who would love it and care for it in your place. Just tell others you just want to travel the world for a few months. They may suspect what you are doing but could never prove it. Or you could let people know and just not care what they think. You'd be doing a good thing giving the baby to someone who wants it though and if people can't see that then screw them right.

Answer 5

First off God bless you. I know how people can be, but you are doing the right thing. If you know you can't give it the life it deserves then you are making the right choice. As to hiding it, big clothes maybe,depending on how much weight you gain. Possible going away the last few weeks if possible. What you tell them is totally up to you, what you are comfortable with. I have been trying to have a baby for seven years and would love to adopt, but I can not afford to go through an agency I need to do a private adoption. I know how hard it can be for some one wanting a child and not being able to have one, so I know you are going to make someones dream come true. Plus your child will have a great life with someone who desperately wants them. Good luck and God bless.

Answer 6

First of all, congrats on being responsible and mature enough to realize that you are not capable of raising a child at this point in your life and by giving up the child, you are actually doing what's best for it. That being said, I feel you should speak with your family frankly about the situation. If you are a thin person, it will soon be too hard to hide the pregnancy. Have you considered that a family member might be able to adopt this baby and raise it as their own? Anyways, good luck, I know it's hard to be pregnant and also worry about what others will say.

Answer 7

Sounds like you need to leave your island. As for God, he forgives if you ask him to. As for the family, that is tough. Family are worse than neighbors. There are agencies that will house you and adopt your baby out. Years ago they were Home for Wayward Girls. Check around. Just be sure this is what you want. And after your pregnancy be more careful. Use birth control.

Answer 8

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Answer 9

I am adopted and have 2 adopted kids. Both of my children's birth moms were your age, and had 3 kids. The birth mom of our son, came to live in our town until the baby was born and then went home after his birth. Adoption is a huge sacrifice but one that you will not regret. An abortion you can regret later, and there are risks to you as well. Abortion is not a quick fix. Believe me, I counsel women who have had abortions or contemplating having one. Your family and friends will support you, even though it is hard to tell them. Adoption is a great thing, you will be blessed, because you remember giving life to your child, and also you can select the parents you desire to raise him/her. If you want to talk more, you can email me. Know that I will be praying for you and your baby.

Answer 10

It is unhealthy for you to hide your pregnancy. If you do not seek prenatal care for your unborn child you are risking their life. And yours. Go see a doctor and tell your mom or dad. Or even an aunt or uncle. Somebody you trust and can help you. Good luck to you and please be safe!!!